by Jim Daly
November 2005
Dear Friends:
Dr. Dobson is taking a well-deserved break from writing his regular newsletter this month in order to catch up on a number of other projects that have emerged during what has been an extremely hectic autumn. His absence provides me with an excellent opportunity to focus on a subject about which Dr. Dobson would be hesitant to write himself — Dr. Dobson! More specifically, I'd like to share a couple of excerpts from a newly released book that provides a unique glimpse at the people, beliefs and experiences that have shaped Dr. Dobson's life and worldview. The book, titled Family Man: The Biography of Dr. James Dobson, was written by former Wall Street Journal reporter Dale Buss.
The first excerpt discusses several individuals beyond his immediate family who were profoundly influential in James Dobson's life during his formative years. Of course, his own mother and father were of paramount importance, but several others contributed to the development of the man we know and love today. This section of the book, with its emphasis on mentoring, is especially meaningful to me in light of my own difficult childhood. As you may know, my parents divorced when I was only 5 years old. My mother remarried when I was 9, but died unexpectedly just one year later. Our stepfather was waiting on the curb with his bags packed when my siblings and I arrived back home after our mother's funeral. He hopped into a cab, and that was the last we saw of him. After reconnecting with my Dad, he also died by the time I was 12. I was an orphan, and I hadn't even reached my teen years.
The absence of parental influences and a stable home environment could potentially have been devastating to me. However, God, in His grace, filled this gaping void in my life with several older individuals who served as mentors to me during the critical teen years. I shudder to consider what direction my life might have taken if not for their care and concern. Sadly, my childhood experiences are not unique. In fact, 34 percent of American children — a whopping 24 million kids — currently live absent of their biological father, while nearly 20 million live in single-parent homes. If we are to equip this upcoming generation for success, we must be willing to come alongside them as role models and mentors. As you read the following, especially as we prepare to count our blessings come Thanksgiving, I would encourage you to consider those in your own life who have sacrificially given of their time and influence to help shape the person you are today.
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Four men influenced Dobson at critical junctures while he was in college, providing him with the same type of strong male mentorship he'd received from his father. Each had a Ph.D. — the same honorific that later would become an integral part of Dobson's persona and career success.
Dr. Eddie Harwood was an English professor who immediately recognized Dobson's potential as a writer and pushed him hard to excel; Dobson took four classes from Professor Harwood. Dobson credits Harwood not only with teaching him how to handle the rigors of writing a serious work but also with passing on the demanding editorial technique that Dobson uses when evaluating the work of others. They remained friends until Harwood's death in 2004.
Dr. Clyde Narramore, a pioneer in Christian psychology, offered to spend an afternoon with any promising student who wanted to enter the field of mental health. In a two-hour visit, he impressed upon Dobson, among other things, the worthiness of behavioral studies as a godly pursuit and the importance of postponing the commitment of marriage until after his career was established.
Dr. Ken Hopkins, who had graduated from Pasadena three years before Dobson and had just earned his Ph.D. from the University of Southern California, was instrumental in Dobson's decision to enroll at USC graduate school instead of attending the University of Texas. (Dobson's entry to USC kept him within the orbit of Shirley Deere, the eventual Mrs. Dobson, at a crucial time in their relationship.) Hopkins became Dobson's major professor in graduate school.
But the man with a Ph.D. who had the most impact on Dobson clearly was Dr. Paul Culbertson, who became his major professor in undergraduate school and mentor for years to come. It was during a freshman-year class with Culbertson that Dobson quickly opened his mind to the study of psychology and to the possibility of lashing it to his Christian worldview. Culbertson was the one to introduce to him the formula for a biblically based study of psychology that later became Dobson's hallmark. It was Professor Culbertson who helped Dobson shape the powerful concepts that would serve as the core of his future ministry. And it was Culbertson who began equipping his protégé with the philosophical tools to promote those ideas with confidence.
"[Culbertson] was a brilliant man," says Wil Spaite, who also became a psychology major and shared most of his classes in that field with Dobson. Culbertson actually had been invited to teach at the much larger and more prestigious University of California — Berkeley up the coast near San Francisco, and he possessed a great understanding of Sigmund Freud, Abraham Maslow and the other secular masters of the still-young field of psychology. But Culbertson was drawn to Pasadena, Spaite recalls, "because as a Christian, he wanted to be able to educate Christians. He was a rare combination of a brilliant mind and a heart for God. He often would say that he still wasn't totally sure whether he was to be a psychologist or a theologian. In a way, he was saying, 'Whatever you do, do it as a minister, not necessarily as a clergyman.'"
Clearly, Dobson was absorbing Culbertson's every teaching.
Culbertson's devotionals at the beginning of class sometimes would go halfway through the session, Spaite recalls. "It wasn't because he was in opposition to psychology or neglecting it, but because he had a deep, profound relationship with God. He would teach in his devotionals that God desired persons to be made whole — and that psychology was a means to bring about healing even though God was the ultimate source of it. I can still remember him talking about how Christ regarded the infinite worth of every person. [Culbertson] had a sense of destiny about himself and his students."
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On behalf of the millions of Christians who have benefited from the wisdom and leadership of Dr. James Dobson, I thank the Lord for Doctors Hardwood, Narramore, Hopkins and Culbertson. Indeed, because we are the product of the lives that touch ours, these men have, both individually and collectively, made a distinct contribution to the kingdom. In that same vein, but with a slight twist, let's now take a look at another excerpt from Family Man discussing a few individuals who suggest that it was Dr. Dobson whose life has made a difference in their own respective careers.
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Consider those who chose Christian radio as a career, largely after being exposed to Dobson. In the mid-1970s, Janet Parshall was a stay-at-home mother of four children in Wisconsin, looking for validation in the role she had chosen instead of responding to her pangs for career satisfaction. "I could have daily messages in my home from Dan Rather and Tom Brokaw or I could turn on Christian radio," Parshall says. Dobson's was "the voice that resonated with what was going on in my heart." After confronting attempts at her kids' public school to introduce New Age practices of the sort that Dobson had been warning about on the air, "in one afternoon I became a member of the knee-jerk, radical Religious Right." As her kids left the nest, Parshall began hosting a daily talk show on a Christian radio station in Milwaukee; and within a couple of years, Concerned Women for America recruited her to Washington, D.C. to be its president. At the same time her husband, Craig Parshall, joined the staff of the Rutherford Institute, a Christian legal organization. More recently, Parshall hosted her own weekly program for Focus, "Renewing the Heart," and now she fills in for Dobson on "Focus" occasionally. Bill Maier trod some of the same ground Dobson did at Childrens Hospital in Los Angeles, both in his psychological training and even in hosting a radio show in California.
Still, joining Focus as one of its "other voices" in January 2002 was a difficult decision for Maier. He and his wife, Lisa, were particularly concerned that when they had children she would be able to remain home with them, but taking the Focus job required Bill to take a pay cut from a lucrative radio and television voice-over career in Los Angeles. Then the Maiers traveled with Dobson to Nashville in February 2002 for the National Religious Broadcasters convention, where Dobson delivered a spirited challenge to his audience to engage the culture. After recounting how homosexual activists were infiltrating public schools and how postmodern culture was discounting the value of preborn life, Dobson challenged his 3,500 listeners to follow in the way of saints and martyrs stretching from John the Baptist to Martin Luther King Jr.
"It was one of the most powerfully convicting messages I'd ever heard… " Maier recalls. Dobson's oratory certainly stirred Maier, who was very quiet afterward in his hotel room. When Lisa Maier asked why, her husband said that God had confirmed their decision to join Focus through Dobson's speech. "I felt the Lord was saying, 'I want you to learn from this man and make a difference in the lives of America's children,'" Bill Maier told his wife.
Many politicians also find themselves swayed by Dobson, probably because they're uniquely empowered to do something about the sources of his alarm. Many of them have even been motivated to run for office because of Dobson's urgings.
Sometimes Dobson strikes really close to home. David Schultheis had been Dobson's neighbor since the mid-1990s when he and his wife, Sandra, and their two daughters and sons-in-law moved to Colorado Springs because of reversals in his real-estate business in California. Before long, they and another couple were getting together regularly with the Dobsons to have dinner and watch old movies. In 1998, the Schultheises attended the Council on National Policy meeting in Phoenix with the Dobsons, where Dobson launched his oratorical bid to reclaim the soul of the GOP.
Schultheis heard his friend loud and clear, and in a way that he didn't expect. "It was a defining moment in my life," Schultheis recalls. Later, at a reception in the suite of former vice president Dan Quayle, Schultheis announced to those in attendance that Dobson's speech was "so profound to me that I've decided I'm going to strongly consider mounting" a campaign for state representative from Colorado Springs. After two elections, Schultheis won the seat, and Dobson became one of his constituents. Likewise, Dobson was a significant reason that the number of committed Christian conservatives on Capitol Hill in the early years of this decade reached a modern high. "We've counted a couple of dozen who've been heavily influenced by [Dobson] and a handful who went there directly because of him," says Tom Minnery, Focus' head of public policy.
Trent Franks is one of the former. He was 22 years old and running his own oil-drilling contracting company in Texas in 1980 when he saw Dobson featured along with Pat Robertson, President Reagan and others in an inspirational film called Assignment: Life. He was so impressed with Dobson's message that he bought a copy of the film for $1,800 and began showing it at churches in the Dallas area. Several years later, in large part motivated by Dobson's plea for Christians to run for political office, Franks got elected to the Arizona state legislature. He later ran the nation's first Family Policy Council in Arizona. And in 2002, Franks won his first term in Congress, where he's been a Dobsonian stalwart ever since.
Frank Wolf was one of the heavily influenced. The native Philadelphian and father of five was elected to Congress out of Virginia in 1980, and he admits that he soon allowed career demands to begin to squeeze out his family. That is, until the evening when some House colleagues talked Wolf into attending a showing of Where's Dad? — Focus's recently released TV special. "It starts very slowly, and I was telling the guys that I really had to get back home because I'd taken some meat out of the freezer," Wolf jokes. "I said to myself, What am I doing here? I really was going to leave, except I'd promised these guys."
Then in the film, Dobson turns to one of his favorite rhetorical devices: reading the lyrics of a popular song as poetry. In this case, it is the words to "Cat's in the Cradle," a ballad about a father's unwillingness to pour himself into his son's life — a message that was especially poignant because its author and singer, Harry Chapin, had been killed in a car accident in 1981. "It had a major impact on me," Wolf says. He "immediately made the commitment" to become a better husband and father and followed through on it. And in the ensuing years, his closer attention to Dobson's concerns greatly influenced Wolf's activities in Congress, where he subsequently helped create the national task forces on pornography and gambling. Dobson served on both. Wolf still slips copies of Where's Dad? into the hands of new colleagues and pulls the tape out once a year to watch himself. "I hate to think [what would have happened] if I hadn't gone to see the film that day," Wolf says. "It's had a major impact on my life."
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After reading these encouraging and inspirational testimonies, I wonder if we might ask ourselves a question. That is, are there people in our own past or present who might say the same of us, as these individuals have said of Dr. James Dobson? Are we investing ourselves in the lives of others? As followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to be the "salt of the earth" and the "light of the world" [Matthew 5:13,14, NIV]. As we approach the Thanksgiving holiday, I'd like to challenge you, if possible, to consider not only thanking those who have impacted you, but also to commit yourself to making a positive difference in the life of another person. Not only will you bless them, but I suspect your spirit will be likewise lifted!
Having had a "sneak peek" at Dale Buss's work, I hope you'll consider requesting a copy of Family Man from Focus on the Family for "the rest of the story." In writing and researching the book, Mr. Buss conducted firsthand interviews not only with Dr. Dobson himself, but also with a number of friends, family members and colleagues. He was also given unprecedented access to the Focus on the Family archives. The end result is an engaging account of Dr. Dobson's life and ministry that is refreshingly candid and honest. A number of our staff members here at Focus had an opportunity to read the book before its release, and all agreed that Family Man contained insights about Dr. Dobson that they had not previously known. Even given our close working relationship, I must admit that after reading the book myself, I have an even better understanding — and greater appreciation — for this man with whom I'm privileged to labor alongside. Thanks for allowing me a few moments share these thoughts with you.
We're sometimes moving at such breakneck speeds that we occasionally forget that we have so much for which to be thankful here in the United States. As you gather with friends and loved ones to express gratitude to the Lord this year, I hope you'll also say a prayer for our elected leaders, asking God to enable them to honor the vision and values of the brave pilgrims who risked everything to establish this great nation so many years ago. You might also say a prayer on behalf of the thousands of individuals and families who remain displaced from their homes and communities in the wake of hurricanes Katrina and Rita.
Dr. Dobson will return in this space next month, just in time for Christmas. Until then, on behalf of the Dobsons and everyone here at Focus on the Family, a happy and Christ-centered Thanksgiving to you and yours!
Sincerely,
Jim Daly
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