Discernment
Set a Family Standard
Setting appropriate entertainment boundaries requires thinking hard, praying and getting past knee-jerk reactions.
adapted from "What's Up With Today's Entertainment?: Raising Media-Wise Teens," a Dare 2 Dig Deeper Parents Series booklet by
Bob Waliszewski, Bob Smithouser
Once you’ve got a handle on your teens’ entertainment preferences, it’s time to set healthy boundaries. Of course, there will be gray areas. We don’t find verses reading, "Thou shalt not watch slasher films" or "Thou shalt not listen to music that glamorizes substance abuse." Instead, each family must decide where to draw the line based on a study of Scripture, fervent prayer and an understanding of each child’s maturity, critical thinking skills and commitment to holiness.
We’ve worked with enough parents over the years to know that thoughtful Christian adults differ substantially on this issue. Some have zealously outlawed secular entertainment in their homes, confident that God has led them to that decision. Others let their children view and listen to almost anything, provided they talk about it first. Between those extremes lies a broad range of possibilities, one of which will be the right fit for your family.
Once you and your spouse have prayerfully settled on an appropriate balance between shielding your teens from mainstream entertainment and discussing it with them, articulate that decision in writing. Develop the equivalent of a "family constitution" as it relates to entertainment habits in your home. Take your time. Ponder the specifics for several days and give the Lord a chance to speak to you about the matter. It will help you work through those "gray areas."
It’s also important that you and your spouse be of like mind as you lovingly lay down the law (after all, it will be up to both of you to enforce it). Stick to your guns. Make it clear that all members of the family are subject to the newly established boundaries. (Note: This can be an especially daunting task if your spouse doesn’t share your vision for entertainment purity, or you are a single parent whose child spends time with a permissive ex-spouse. In such cases, ask that your rules be respected, pray for everyone involved, and when necessary seek out a neutral third party as mediator.)