When I moved out of my parent's house, no one told me how to scrutinize my credit report, live on a diet of macaroni and cheese or handle disappointment if I didn't marry by the time I turned 30 years old. Maybe I just didn't feel like these were important issues at the time. Or maybe, like millions of other single women, I assumed that my Mr. Right would make me his bride, take care of the finances and encourage me to buy food that wasn't of the pre-packaged variety.
Reality is so different than what I imagined nineteen years ago. Since then, I've won the battle of the bank book and have only sometimes eaten SpaghettiOs from the can. But the one thing that hasn't changed is my marital status.
For the life of me, I can't figure out why I haven't met a mate. I'm open to love, family and marriage, I'm emotionally stable and I've prayed countless times for a spouse. Still, I haven't met my husband.
Over the years, I've come to terms with my singleness. I've learned to cut out the whining and to celebrate life.
The most important I've learned is that I don't have to trick myself into believing that life is good. When we focus on others, when we strive to serve God, when we choose to believe that He is in control of our lives, that He loves us and knows what is best for us, we're more likely to focus on "whatever is good, whatever is lovely" (Phil. 4:8) like Scripture commands. Which I know from experience is much better than focusing on what you don't have and feeling miserable.
This isn't an easy mentality to embrace. It's even harder when it gets lonely or when fears about the future set in. The key is to go on the offensive. These are a few ways that have helped me combat self-pity, embrace joy and celebrate life: