Focus on the Family Broadcast

Forgiving Others, Freeing the Soul (Part 2 of 2)

Forgiving Others, Freeing the Soul (Part 2 of 2)

Dr. Tim Keller unpacks powerful stories of forgiveness and shares Scripture to help you forgive those who’ve wronged you, as you gain a better understanding of all that Christ has forgiven. Dr. Keller takes you through the steps to forgiveness, including the need to forgive yourself, and how to lovingly confront others. (Part 2 of 2)
Original Air Date: November 30, 2022

Preview:

John Fuller: In his book about forgiveness, Dr. Tim Keller writes, “We have a profound need to grant and receive forgiveness. Forgiveness gets down to the bottom of things, to the alienation we feel from God and from ourselves because of our wrongdoing. The deepest need of our nature is for Jesus, and the doorway is to know forgiveness.” Dr. Keller is back with us today on Focus on the Family as we continue a conversation on this topic. And your host is Focus president and author Jim Daly.

End of Preview

Jim Daly: Hey John, we had a really good visit with Tim Keller about this critical matter of forgiveness. And we all need to know how to forgive others, because as Christians, we’ve been forgiven so much. Uh, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to let go of bad feelings we may have for someone else. It’s in our sinful nature to harbor resentment or to want to retaliate. I mean, we see it in the news every day. Today Dr. Keller will bring more powerful stories and very practical help for us in forgiving others, so stay with us.

John: Dr. Tim Keller is an author and the founding pastor of Redeemer Presbyterian Church in Manhattan. He now works with Redeemer City to City, an organization he co-founded. The new book he’s written is called Forgive: Why Should I and How Can I? I hope you’ll contact us today to get your copy. You’ll find us at focusonthefamily.com/broadcast or call 800-A-FAMILY. We spoke with Dr. Keller outdoors near his home in New York and we’ll pick up the conversation with a couple of great examples of forgiveness. And here now is Jim Daly with Dr. Tim Keller on Focus on the Family.

Jim: You had another really impactful story right here in New York. We’re hearing some of the ambient sounds of sirens.

Dr. Timothy Keller: Are you? What?

Jim: You know, this is an active city, isn’t it John?

John: (laughs) Very active.

Jim: (laughs)

John: Very energetic.

Jim: But you had a story of a New York gang member, young man-

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: … Who, uh, demonstrated incredible forgiveness and describe that story and where, where does, uh … What I would decide or believe would be his unbelieving heart, but y- he can demonstrate some powerful Godly truths, even if he doesn’t have a faith in Christ.

Timothy: Well th- you know, there’s actually two stories. One of, one of them was a, a policeman who was trying to break something up and was, uh, injured by a kid, you know, a, a, an inner city youth, and he was paralyzed the rest of his life. And, um, it’s interesting, he tried to talk to the kid in prison, he tried to write him in prison, and the guy wouldn’t talk to him. And then int- weirdly enough, he got out and then died in a motorcycle-

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: … Accident.

Jim: Huh.

Timothy: And then there was another one where the boy, uh, he wasn’t hurt by the, it wasn’t the pol- … He was hurt by other gang members. And he, um, was also paralyzed, and he, he also forgave. And in both cases, the boy, uh, forgave the people who had, had, um, uh, basically paralyzed them. The, the, the policeman had forgiven the youth who had harmed him. In fact, the policeman … By the way, they’re, I know I’m, I’m kind of directing your question to something else. Interesting, the policeman, looking back, said, “I, I now actually realize that it did look pretty racist for me just to show up at these poor kids’ places of, uh, where they were playing and where they were living.” He, he wasn’t just convicted that he needed to become a Christian and forgive, but even that he actually had been a person who was sort of guilty of injustice.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: So it’s, it’s all those, uh, it’s never just I’ve forgiven.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: But usually there’s, uh, a humbling that happens and a new, a new way of understanding themselves.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: So forgiveness is really transformational. It doesn’t just reconcile you to other people, it actually gives you a completely different approach to yourself.

Jim: Well, I, I think the purpose in my asking about those stories is really to set this question up, and that is h- how do you know when you have not or you have truly forgiven somebody? It, there can be a bit of fuzziness about that.

Timothy: Oh yeah.

Jim: I’ll give you a quick example, for me when I speak about my childhood and my dad, the alcoholic, and they divorced, my mom and dad, and men who are 60 and 70 years old will be in this line and they’ll come up to me in tears saying, “I’ve never been able to forgive my father.”

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: And I, it’s a hard one for me that, what do you say? I mean, you have to let it go. You have to not hold that against them. You’ve got to forgive them. But there is a lot of that, Tim, in the-

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: Christian culture, just these grievances that we really haven’t dealt with. So how do we know, A, that they exist, and then B, if we’ve actually forgiven?

Timothy: Right. I don’t think there’s a bright line that you say, if you, if you’ve passed there … I, I do actually think it’s frankly relative. I mean, I’ll g- … That sounds terrible. Oh my goodness, a Presbyterian minister’s s- … Is that relative? It’s, no, I don’t mean that. I mean this, here’s what I’ll do. Shorthand, here’s my pastoral advice to somebody. I will say, and it’s in the book, “Forgiveness is granted before it’s felt.” Most people say, “I, I’m still mad.”

Jim: Uh-huh.

Timothy: “So I haven’t forgiven.” So I’ll say, “Okay, for a moment, why don’t we, uh, separate the two.” Because some people would say, “Since I’m still mad, I can’t forgive.” And I’ll say, “No, forgiveness is something you can grant before you actually feel it.” And that’s very important. And I’ll say, “Well, what does it mean to grant?” Okay, forgiveness is a, is a, it’s a commitment. In principle, the commitment is I am not going to take revenge on this person. I am not gonna make this person pay, okay. In other words, that’s the definition of any forgiveness. I mean, in the book I try to say if somebody knocks your lamp over, it’s $50 and they say, “Oh, I’m so sorry.” You can either say, “Yeah, so that’ll be $50 please,” or you can say, “Forget it,” which means you forgive them, but then you have to go out and buy the lamp. The $50 doesn’t go away.

Jim: Right.

Timothy: Or, or maybe you go in darkness, but the point is, somebody pays. And when … Forgiveness is always, always deciding I’m not gonna make the other person pay. I’m gonna absorb it. But to really grant forgiveness day in and day out is to make a commitment to do three things. Not to keep bringing the matter up to the person, not to keep bringing the matter up to other people to try to kind of run them down, you know, get back at them by hurting their reputation, and not to keep bringing it up over and over again to yourself. So what that means is I, if I find myself thinking about it too much, I say, “No, I’m not gonna do that.” Right, it’s a commitment to yourself. Uh, If I find myself kind of having an opportunity to run the person down to somebody else, I’m not gonna do that. And if I have an opportunity to use this against … And this actually happens, by the way, in marriage.

Jim: I … (laughs) boy, I was thinking that.

Timothy: I know, I know you’re gonna think about. In other words, s- you say … Is your, if your spouse says, “Please forgive me, honey, for that,” and then you say, “Yes,” then you can’t bring it up again f- six months later. You must not bring it up six months later. And here’s the thing, if you actually make, follow through on those commitments, you’ll feel the anger diminishing over time. If you don’t make those three commitments, the anger I think stays a very, very long time. So it’s granted before it’s felt. It’s, the granting is basically I’m not gonna take revenge, but then actual day in and day out, it means just refusing to go in those directions. And I think, now where you actually cross the line, I don’t know. But it gets better and better.

Jim: You know, Tim, I often think, you know, you’re one of the leading theologians. You’ve, you’ve talked and written so deeply on meaningful Biblical topics. This one is kind of in the category. You know, what makes it so difficult for us to forgive? Is it that contrary to our human nature that it, it is only God’s nature that you find that forgiveness? It’s not in the other guy’s, uh capability.

Timothy: I think, I do think that the … The way the Puritans, Jonathan Edwards’s famous sermon A Divine and Supernatural Light talks about the difference between knowing honey is sweet and actually tasting honey.

Jim: Huh.

Timothy: If I tell you honey is sweet, you’ll say, “Okay, I believe honey is sweet,” but if you haven’t tasted it, it, you don’t really know it. You know it but you don’t really know it.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: And once you taste it, then you know it and know it. I mean, e- experientially you know it and intellectually you know it. And I’d say it’s one thing to say, “I’m a forgiven s- … I know that I’m a sinner, but absolutely saved by grace.” To what degree is that a spiritual reality to your heart? It’s, you know it, but I mean, to what degree is it a spiritual reality? And the more it’s a spiritual reality, the more you, the more it makes you weep with both joy and humiliation.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: The easier it is to forgive, it’s just as, it’s almost as simple as that. It, I don’t think, um, that forgiveness is hard. It, it’s harder the less God is real to you and it’s easier the more he’s real to you for the-

Jim: Boy, that is a good statement right there.

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: That’s powerful. And I think that, that also in interviewing a lot of women on the theme of marriage and parenting, and the one thing that I’ve noticed, and you know this, John, they have an incredible capacity to look at themselves first. I think we as men, we kinda have the ego that says, “That’s the other guy’s fault.”

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: But in that context, the question of how to forgive yourself. I’m not the good mom, I’m not the perfect wife. I’m not a good husband. Where does that forgiveness for self come in?

Timothy: Yeah, where does that come? If somebody’s asking me that, I’m not going to, uh … I’m gonna work with them. I’m not sure that I think it’s the best way of talking about it.

Jim: Huh.

Timothy: Uh, now if you’re RC Sproul, what RC used to do is he used to say … If somebody said, “I have, uh, I know God’s forgiven me but I can’t forgive myself,” and he says, “So you have higher standards than God, huh.”

Jim: (laughs)

Timothy: It’s a little … Which I thought was a little bit, I don’t know … I’m not sure that’s the best bedside manner if somebody’s really struggling, but he’s right.

Jim: No, at the core what you’re saying is you’re-

Timothy: You’re really saying, “I have higher standards than God.” I mean, people, well wait a minute. No, I can’t. I don’t have high … And here’s what’s going on I think. I am not gonna say this right outta the blocks, I’m not even sure it’s true. With, with a particular person, I have to spend some time. Generally speaking, there’s another God going on here. God’s forgiven me but I can’t forgive myself. Okay, if your real God is your career and you did something really stupid and you’re probably never gonna get your career back on track, and your self-image is not so much based on I’m a child of God, it’s based on I’m a successful-

Jim: I’m an achiever.

Timothy: … Whatever. Right.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: And now I haven’t achieved and I can’t forgive myself, what you’ve really got here is an idol. And see, false gods can’t forgive, see. What I always like to say to people is the reason why it’d be better to s- to serve Jesus rather than your, your career or anything else, is Jesus, if you get Him, He actually satisfies you. You w- … You know, the CS Lewis thing is you get to the top of your career or you become as beautiful as you wanna be or you get everything you want, and inst-

Jim: It’s never enough.

Timothy: It’s never enough. Jesus is the only God that if you get Him, will satisfy you, and if you fail Him, will forgive you. Your career will never forgive you for your sins. Your career will punish you the rest of your life if that’s your god. And so I, it takes me a while with people. I can’t just jump in and say, “Oh, you must be, there must be some idolatry here.” You know, I mean, in other words-

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: … I would never go in that way fast. Uh, and you might even … Actually i- if you know the person well and they’re not in too much trouble, you might do the, the RC. It’s almost like a joke saying, “So you have higher standards than God if …” You know, and, “No, I guess not.” I mean, sometimes that actually helps.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: But in most cases, it’s usually something that they’ve given their heart way too much to.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: And it is punishing them because it, they failed that false god, and that’s, that’s where a lot of that comes from.

Jim: That i- it’s really insightful. I mean, it’s a test for idolatry. I mean, that is really powerful.

Timothy: Yes. Uh, inordinate … Actually any inordinate emotion that you can’t get rid of … So, uh, inordinate bitterness actually can be, towards somebody else, can mean that this is an idol. Inordinate fear that I’m gonna lose it. Inordinate guilt that oh, I failed. And you just c- … Inordinate meaning it just doesn’t seem to be resolvable.

Jim: Right.

Timothy: Very often there’s some, there’s some kind of idolatry at work.

Jim: That’s something. Let me, let me go back for a moment where you have that conflict with another person and your forgiveness is dependent upon that person’s response.

Timothy: Ah.

Jim: Is, can that be okay or is that unhealthy if, back to the groveling, but there may be some more subtle things like that that-

Timothy: Right.

Jim: … It’s only gonna work if you demonstrate a certain action-

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: … Then I’ll forgive you.

Timothy: Yeah, I’m really glad you got there, uh, you asked that question, ’cause I, we, that’s important part of the book here. There’s, there’s two verses that look like they’re contradictions. Mark 11:25 says, Jesus says, if you’re standing and praying and you realize you’ve got anything against anyone, forgive them. And it doesn’t seem to have any conditions, just you have to forgive them. Luke 17 is where it says if a person repents, you have, should forgive them, even if they do it over and over, you r- forgive them. And so it looks like one is saying you don’t have to forgive til they repent, the other one looks like it says you have to forgive whether they repent or not. And my dear departed friend, David Powlison, I don’t know if you knew who he was-

Jim: No.

Timothy: But he is a counselor, died recently. Actually I think he died of pancreatic cancer, but anyway.

Jim: Oh my.

Timothy: He said there’s an internal forgiveness that you do bef- immediately, that’s Mark 11:25, where you make those commitments we were talking about before, not to keep bringing it up to yourself and others, where you say I’m not gonna pay back and you forgive. But then you do need to go, b- uh, for the person’s sake, for God’s sake, for others’ sake, and say, ” You did something here that you really, I don’t think you should’ve done.” Now if you go to them having forgiven, they still may get their back up and just not wanna talk to you. Uh, if you go to them kind of unforgiving and kinda vengeful saying, “Do you know what you did to me,” th- they will definitely get their back up and not listen to you. But if you go to them forgiven, forgiving and gracious and all that, they might actually start to say, “Oh, I didn’t realize that, I’m so sorry,” and they change and you reconcile. Great. But Romans 12:18 says, “As much as it depends on you, live at peace with all.” And what that means is you take whatever you get. If the person does not respond well or doesn’t wanna talk about it, or even responds very poorly, you know, in a way that’s really kinda half wrong, you know. It, I think what you say is, “I got i- whatever, I can get, and now I’m still gonna s- I’m gonna be forgiving and I’m gonna try to be as open to the person as I possibly can.”

Jim: Wh- in that respect, um, I’m thinking of circumstances I’ve been involved in where you’re extending an olive branch and it gets bitten off, (laughs) you know, so you do it again, and maybe a third time. Is there a time that you can say, “Okay, I gave it my best shot and it’s just not happening,” and you stop extending the olive branch?

Timothy: Yeah, yeah. I think you, I think it, that’s a judgment call that as long as you say that the, the door is, you know, still open.

Jim: But it may have to come from the other direction? (laughs)

Timothy: Yeah, right. That’s right. In other words, I, I think, I don’t know how often.

Jim: Right.

Timothy: You know, the Matthew 18 thing where you go to the person and if they don’t listen to you, you take somebody, if they don’t listen to you, tell it to the church. Most people do not really m- think that Jesus is saying y- you get three tries.

Jim: Right.

Timothy: It certainly looks like a process, and surely in different situations you would take longer and do it more often or … Uh, it’s never loving to make it easy for someone to sin against you.

Jim: Huh.

Timothy: It’s not loving to that person, and I have seen some people, you know, say, “I’m just trying to put out the olive branch,” but basically they’re just getting clobbered-

Jim: Right.

Timothy: … Every single time. And I said, “I don’t think it makes … I- it’s not helping the perpetrator by making it so easy for the perpetrator to despise you and yell at you and I don’t know that that’s a good idea.”

Jim: That’s, yeah, that’s an interesting perspective. You’re emboldening them to continue the behavior-

Timothy: Yeah, and it’s not loving to them.

Jim: … That hurts other people. Um, let me ask you this, one of the hardest things for people to do is to confront someone lovingly, and I think, again-

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: Is there a difference between, uh, confronting a non-believer and someone within the community of Christ. And, you know, the scenario makes all the difference and I, I’m just thinking about do you go about it differently? ‘Cause on the one hand, I can remember a Christian leader saying to me, “Who’s gonna hold them accountable to God’s righteousness,” and that would be the response to loving your neighbor, perhaps without any boundaries. So how do you, how do you engage I guess that accountability between the world and the church?

Timothy: Yeah.

Jim: The fellow believer.

Timothy: Well, certainly I do think that if you have another professing believer who you think has wronged you, I think the Matthew 18 stuff is that you are both accountable to God, you’re both accountable to the scripture, you might be in the same church, maybe not. But I do think you, the reconciliation, uh, attempt can go on longer. You know, you, you have more resources, you probably should, should not give up on it, your brothers or sisters in Christ. Uh, I do think somebody outside, there’s a limit to what you can appeal to when you’re talking to them, you know. I mean, with, with a Christian, you’ve got all that. You’ve got the word of God and you’ve got so many other … You’ve got better arguments for why you shouldn’t have done that.

Jim: Right.

Timothy: Um, and so I guess I would just say that reconciliation, you shouldn’t give up as soon, you should spend more time with it. You’ve got more resources for a Christian. I would say, so in some ways, it’s easier than with a non-Christian, because the non-Christian, you don’t have as many resources, you don’t have as good arguments. But I would say the pro- here’s the problem with the Christian who’s wronged you versus the non-Christian, the non-Christian, you say, “Well, you know, I don’t know whether they know any better.” I mean, you know the place where Treebeard in Lord of the Rings says, “A wizard should know better?”

Jim: (laughs) Right.

Timothy: You know, (laughs) and he says, he s- wait a minute, you’ve done all this to the trees, and wait a minute, you, you’re a wizard. You’re not just somebody else, you’re not just somebody else. You’re a wizard, you should know better. And I do think that Christians very often find it very difficult to forgive other Christians for that very reason. You say, “Come on.”

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: So it’s easier and harder, so they, they’re just different.

Jim: You know, one of the, uh, arguments I’ve heard back when I worked in the business world, this was really interesting, I, I knew a number of secular business people. And they would say to me, you know, “Most of the Christian business people I’ve worked with, they wronged me, they cost me money, they didn’t pay me back,” or something like that, “And so that’s why I don’t pursue God.” And I start smiling at them and I can remember doing this several times, and that irritated them and they’d look at me and I’d say, “W- it’s kinda foolish to keep eternal life from you because somebody didn’t live it well.” (laughs) You know, so using the argument that somebody didn’t live their Christian faith properly in your eyes is no argument not to pursue a relationship with God.

Timothy: No. No.

Jim: (laughs)

Timothy: And you know what I always try to, this may not be the best bedside manner, but I said, “Ah,” when somebody says well this has happened, that happened, that’s why I, I find Christianity … I said, “So that convinced you that Jesus wasn’t raised from the dead.”

Jim: (laughs) Right. Exactly.

Timothy: You know, I said, uh, I said, “Now, w- wait a minute, as a non sequitur, j- just, okay, so this ostensibly Christian businessman cheated you, so that mean … You said, “Ah, that just proves that Jesus wasn’t raised from the dead.” I said, “You really oughta go look at the evidence …”

Jim: (laughs) Right.

Timothy: “… For the Christian faith instead of just say-”

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: “… You know, that guy w- was a hypocrite.”

Jim: Right.

Timothy: So it, it …

Jim: So much wiser. (laughs)

Timothy: I kind of understand it. I mean, there’s no doubt we, we do believe that if you’re an attractive person, you attract people to Christ, but sometimes I think people are not very logical when they, when they just say, “Oh, look at that person. They say he’s a Christian, that shows there’s nothing to it.” Well.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: You know, like I mean, there are quack doctors, that doesn’t mean medicine is, is-

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: … Is a bogus thing.

John: Dr. Keller, somebody has been listening along and they might’ve been influenced by something you’ve said but they just can’t get to that point of forgiving somebody who has really wounded them. They’re still stuck.

Timothy: Y- yeah.

John: What do you say to them?

Timothy: Well, g- get a conversation partner. I’m not saying … It doesn’t have to be a necessarily professional counselor. Get a conversation partner who you think first of all maybe has had to forgive. F- find somebody that you know h- seems to have forgiven something that w- h- hurt them. Uh, find a conversation partner who’s a mature Christian. And open up and I think you probably ought to be talking with somebody about it. Uh, j- I , I really do. Now, I’m hoping the book might be of help.

John: Sure.

Timothy: Uh, and even though, uh, Jim Daly’s quite an, you know, he really can interrogate you.

Jim: (laughs)

Timothy: I want you to know, however, he didn’t get me to say everything that’s in the book.

John: Yeah. Of course.

Timothy: All right. So there’s, there’s a lot in the book that we didn’t cover here.

John: What, what kind of a prayer can that person really zero in on as they talk to God about this?

Timothy: Yeah, you know, uh, I would say l- … I, I w- I would read, by the way, the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant, and then I’d say, “Lord, just speak to me through this. Help me see something that might make it possible for me to forgive my fellow servant. That’s it.

Jim: Uh, Tim, the last question here, uh, ’cause it’s such a good illustration. In the book you mention a story about an Australian medical missionary, uh, which was very powerful, so we don’t wanna miss that one.

Timothy: In India.

Jim: And there’s other stories, but, uh, let’s hit that one right at the end, ’cause a- again, it makes such an impact.

Timothy: Yeah, the, uh, it was an Australian, uh, medical missionary family that was, uh, quite a number of years ago, that was in India working with, um, lepers, and a lot of very, very poor people didn’t have good medical treatment. Um, something that still happens today, I’m afraid, was a, an anti-Christian mob found the husband and I think two sons, I believe. I think there were two sons and a, and a daughter, and the two sons were with the father in a car and they surrounded the car and I th- and, and killed them. Surrounded the car and killed them. And the mother and her daughter, after they’ve discovered this, said, “We’re gonna stay here and we’re gonna continue the work.” And eventually they, they formed a hospital. She stayed her e- her entire life, and, uh, her daughter grew up there, and they just said, “We, you know, this is not gonna stop us from loving these people. Uh, this is not gonna stop us.” And, of course, today they are venerated by, by the way, by the Hindu government, which today is actually still pretty hostile to Christians. And yet they got, I forget what the name of the m- is, there’s some highest order of merit that was given to, uh, her for, for staying there and doing all this, uh, uh, healthcare for the poor of India. It is pretty remarkable.

Jim: That is remarkable.

Timothy: And she, she, when she was being covered, it was, it was big news, of course, at the time. And she says, “Well we’re gonna forgive and we’re gonna stay.”

Jim: Right.

Timothy: And forgiveness is an act of self-denial, but we live in a culture that continually says self-assertion, self-assertion. Don’t let anybody make you feel guilty. Don’t let anybody walk all over you. Don’t let anybody keep you from what you want. In a culture of self-assertion, we will become more and more incapable of forgiveness, and Christians will more and more be a counterculture in which forgiveness is still possible.

Jim: Yeah.

Timothy: And I think Christians therefore can be salt and light in this country if we’re still able to forgive but not if we start to use all the same belligerent sort of language that everybody else is using.

Jim: Kind of ending where we started when I said that we’re, in the Christian community, we’re trying to use carnal tools to battle carnal people.

Timothy: You, you did say that.

Jim: I did.

Timothy: How wise of you, sir. (laughs)

Jim: And then expecting a spiritual result.

Timothy: No, you’re right. Totally.

Jim: You gotta use spiritual tools to get a spiritual result.

Timothy: Totally right.

Jim: (laughs) Tim, it’s so good to be with you. Thank you. I mean, when you say, “Thank you for your time,” that can often be a throwaway line, but given what’s happening in your life and where God has you right now, thank you for your time.

Timothy: Well thank you for actually coming all the way (laughs) …

Jim: It’s all right.

Timothy: … Just yards from where I live in order to have a live interview. I was amazed. If you were gonna, I said, “If you’re gonna do that, okay.” I can come out, so.

Jim: Well that was kind. Thank you so much. Appreciate it.

John: Well, what a privilege to visit with Dr. Tim Keller, who so graciously spoke with us on this very important topic of forgiveness and, uh, his great book about this is called Forgive: Why Should I and How Can I?

Jim: I think every Christian, John, should have a go-to resource like this that they can use in helping to heal relationships that are strained. Dr. Keller has compiled Biblical wisdom on the principles and practices of forgiveness and how to reconcile with someone and receiving God’s forgiveness in the process. Ask for this and when you send a donation of any amount, we’ll send you a copy as our way of saying thank you. And in fact, right now when you give to Focus, your gift will be doubled, dollar for dollar, to help even more families thrive in Christ. So please, help to give families hope with your gift today, and that gift will be doubled, and again, we’ll send you Dr. Keller’s book as our way of saying thank you.

John: Donate today as you can and get your copy of this book by Dr. Keller. Uh, our number is 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY, 800-232-6459, or visit us online at focusonthefamily.com/broadcast. On behalf of Jim Daly and the entire team, thanks for joining us today for Focus on the Family. I’m John Fuller, inviting you back as we once again help you and your family thrive in Christ.

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Forgive: Why Should I and How Can I?

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A Legacy of Music and Trusting the Lord

Popular Christian vocalist Larnelle Harris reflects on his five-decade music career, sharing the valuable life lessons he’s learned about putting his family first, allowing God to redeem a troubled past, recognizing those who’ve sacrificed for his benefit, and faithfully adhering to biblical principles amidst all the opportunities that have come his way.

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Accepting Your Imperfect Life

Amy Carroll shares how her perfectionism led to her being discontent in her marriage for over a decade, how she learned to find value in who Christ is, not in what she does, and practical ways everyone can accept the messiness of marriage and of life.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 2

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Cherishing Your Spouse Every Day

Do you love your spouse, or do you truly cherish them? Gary Thomas encourages couples to make a daily effort to go beyond the ‘duty’ of love, and combat the natural inclination to drift apart, by choosing to see the best in their spouse.

Mr. Gary Thomas

Gary Thomas is an international speaker and best-selling, award-winning author whose books include Married SexSacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting. He has also written numerous articles for several prominent national magazines. Gary and his wife, Lisa, reside in Texas and have three children. You can learn more about Gary by visiting his website, www.garythomas.com.

cherish front cover

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.” Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book–Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

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Newest Release - Episode 2: Heroes Providing Hope

Discover the amazing work our PRC’s Directors, Nurses, and Volunteers are making in their communities! You’ll see firsthand testimonies of a PRC in action, and that there are other options outside of abortions! You’ll also discover how your family can support your local PRC!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 4: Sometimes the Choice is Hard

Hear real life stories of parents who have made the decision to choose life even though the circumstances were overwhelming. You’ll see why “ALL” life is precious to God and why choosing life is always the right decision!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 3: The Power of a Picture

Have you ever wondered what a baby looked like in the womb? With today’s technology, Moms and Dads can see the baby’s heartbeat, facial expressions, and movements! You’ll find out why more women choose life once they hear their baby’s heartbeat and realize it’s a real living human!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 5: It’s Going to be Amazing!

After a couple has chosen life, hear the heartwarming stories of children that culture would have cast aside, yet are making tremendous impacts in their communities. Whether the diagnosis was adverse or the circumstances were difficult, these stories will inspire you to come along side of families who have chosen life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 6: Families Helping Families!

So, after all you’ve seen through the SeeLife ‘21 Episodic journey; what can you do now? We’ll share how you can partner with some amazing organizations that are making significant impacts in the pro-life movement! You want to Celebrate Life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 2

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Effective Habits to Embrace in Parenting

To be an effective parent, you must be a leader in your child’s life, guiding with a gentle hand and setting a solid example. Dr. Randy Schroeder provides the insight you need to be a leader-parent. As he explores the foundational Rs—relationship, routines, responsibilities, and rules—you’ll better understand the role you play in your child’s life. You’ll learn great phrases to employ such as “Either/Or/You Decide” and “When You/Then You”. While there is no perfect parent, this nuts-and-bolts material will equip you to lead your child in a loving, confident manner.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder has spent more than four decades writing, counseling, speaking, and teaching. For nearly 25 years, he was Vice President of Student Personnel Services, Dean of Students, and a professor of pastoral counseling at Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne, Ind. He’s also led a successful counseling practice helping individuals, couples, and families to thrive in their lives and relationships.

Cover image of Dr. Randall Schroeder's book "Simple Habits for Effective Parenting"

Simple Habits for Effective Parenting

Effective parenting is now within your grasp! With this inspiring how-to comprehensive book, achieve extraordinary results in raising a child to be self-assured, self-reliant, and responsible! You will be able to successfully lead and lovingly encourage your child toward a Godly life!

The Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage

God designed marriage to reflect His love to the world; and because of this, the enemy wants to destroy God’s beautiful design. Based on his book, Defending Your Marriage, Dr. Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff share about the reality of spiritual warfare against marriages, and how to combat the enemy’s lies with the truth of God. Couples will be encouraged that they’re not alone in the fight for a godly marriage and better equipped to be a shining example for the world around them.

Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff Cropped

Dr. Tim and Mrs. Noreen Muehlhoff

Dr. Tim Muehlhoff is a professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication, apologetics, gender, and conflict resolution.  Tim and his wife, Noreen, are both on staff with Biola’s Center for Marriage and Relationships  where he is a co-host of The Art of Relationship podcast. 

Defending Your Marriage

Is your marriage under attack? Sometimes it can feel like the world is trying to tear your marriage apart. Internal conflicts or external pressures might make you wonder if something sinister is going on. How can you tell if you’re facing spiritual opposition? And what can you do about it? Tim Muehlhoff provides a straightforward resource for protecting your marriage from the threats of the evil one. He looks at what Scripture says about spiritual warfare and how our everyday struggles have deeper spiritual realities. And he provides practical steps for guarding our marriages with the whole armor of God.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 1

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 2

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 2

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage - Part 2

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 1

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

How a Former Abortion Doctor Became Pro-Life

As an abortion doctor at Planned Parenthood, Dr. Patti Giebink believed she was helping women. Later, she began reading scripture and God gradually changed her heart on the abortion issue. Patti tells the story of her long journey from abortion doctor to pro-life and encourages listeners to share the message of life with compassion.

Headshot image of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Patti Giebink

Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

Cover image of the book "Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life"

Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life

Unexpected Choice is told from the perspective of a doctor who actually performed abortions through Planned Parenthood. The book chronicles her journey from being a pro-choice physician to someone speaking on behalf of the pro-life movement.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Thank you for committing to pray for the pre-born!

Sign up below for your free seven-day prayer guide. This daily guide will help give direction to your prayers for the pro-life movement. We will be praying with you!