Husband Wants to Use Porn to Spice up Sex Life With Wife

In a word, yes. There are a number of positive ways in which a couple can "spice up" their marriage relationship. Turning to pornography isn't one of them.

Based on what you've told us, we're unclear as to whether or not you consider yourself a Christian. In either case, you may want to take this opportunity to learn about the biblical view of marriage and God's original design and intent for human sexuality. A good place to begin is Focus on the Family's article series titled "God's Design for Sex."

Pornography undermines the significance of the marriage covenant. By proposing to bring it into your bedroom, you're basically telling your wife that you want to have multiple sex partners at the same time. That's bad enough, but pornography is also powerfully addictive. Those who use it come to depend upon "partners" – images in videos and magazines – other than their own spouses to stimulate sexual arousal. Like any other drug, porn tends to lose its potency over time, so that eventually the addict needs more and more to achieve the same "high." Many users end up gravitating toward hard core erotic material and even violent porn.

As you can tell, we regard the use of pornography in marriage as very dangerous thing. If you can't see the sense of this argument, you may want to call and discuss the issue at greater length with one of our staff counselors. Each is a committed Christian, a licensed therapist whose views and approach are compatible with a biblical perspective.

 

Related Video
Guarding Your Heart and Eyes From Pornography: Gary Rosberg speaks candidly to men about the dangers of pornography and offers advice for escaping its grip.

Resources
Love Must Be Tough: New Hope for Marriages in Crisis

Nothing to Hide: Hope for Marriages Hurt by Pornography and Infidelity

Digital Pornography Addiction: What You Need to Know and Where to Find Help

Articles
God's Design for Sex

Pornography and Virtual Infidelity

Dealing With Pornography

Pornography

Copyright © 2010, Focus on the Family.