This might disappoint you, but we don’t think girls your age should ask boys out on dates. Though we can’t tell you what to do or how to run your life, we do have good reasons for feeling this way.
Your mom and dad know you best, and so we recommend that you ask them for guidance. They may seem old to you, but they were young once and they probably understand your situation better than you realize. They also have your best interests at heart.
If you still want our advice, we’d say that it would be wise to wait a few years before getting involved in a one-on-one dating relationship. There are many other ways for you and the boy you like to get to know each other. Maybe you could do things together in a group setting. If he’s involved in a particular club or church group, you may want to join. If he plays on a sports team at your school, go to the games or volunteer to help out with the team or become a sports booster.
Another idea would be to ask your parents if you can invite a group of friends over to your house for a fun activity like a pizza or video night. Then invite this boy and some of his friends to come. Talk to your parents about the details first, and make sure they’ll be home.
In the middle of all this, remember that God loves you as His daughter. Your identity and self-worth don’t depend on your ability to win a boy’s attention or affection. The Lord wants you to grow up and marry a wonderful man who will cherish you and treat you with kindness, gentleness and respect. Any boy who doesn’t act this way toward you isn’t worth a minute of your time.
If you need more insight, we suggest you get a copy of Eric Ludy’s book
When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Approach to Guy/Girl Relationships. And for additional help, feel free to call and speak with one of our staff counselors.
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