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PTSD and Your Marriage

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For victims of PTSD and their spouses, there is hope. Treatment and time can help heal the inner injuries of a person battling PTSD and mitigate PTSD's devastating impact on marriage relationships.

Why does he want to be by himself? Why does he seem so angry? Questions tormented Hope’s* thoughts. Her husband, Phil, had returned from deployment a different man, and she wanted to understand why. Eventually she got her answer: post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) — an answer that fueled even more questions, such as, What will this mean for us? Will he get better? Can we still be a family?

When Phil got back, Hope looked forward to recapturing the emotional intimacy they had shared as soul mates before he left. Instead she got a close-lipped spouse who did not want to discuss what happened “over there.” What is hidden behind this new partition of concealment, she wondered. Since they had always been open and transparent with each other, she assumed she had permission to find out. She did not realize her husband’s condition revoked her permission.

Hope pressed Phil to talk about the secrets he kept private. He reacted with anger to protect himself and push her away. He said, “Why should I tell you about what happened when I don’t want to think about it myself?” She recoiled with hurt and resentment.

Trauma occurs when a person experiences a threat or harm to him- or herself or others, such as combat situations, rape, sexual assault, accidents, domestic violence, natural disasters or a confrontation at gunpoint or knifepoint. This can include situations in which police officers and first responders witness trauma to others.

About 7 to 8 percent of people in the U.S. will suffer PTSD in their lifetime. In a given year, 8 million adults have PTSD; 10 percent of those are women, 4 percent are men.

For spouses and victims of PTSD, healing may feel like an endurance event. But there is hope. The belief that a person with PTSD cannot recover is no longer valid. Treatment and supportive relationships can help heal the inner injuries of a person battling PTSD and mitigate PTSD’s impact on marriage relationships.

The hidden wounds of PTSD

When you see an amputee, his or her wounds and losses are somewhat obvious. But when your spouse struggles with PTSD, neither of you may know it. He conceals his emotional wounds to avoid feeling vulnerable. Her anger pushes others away and protects her from exposing her emotional scars. His reactions only hinder him from getting the help he needs to heal. She shuffles through each day like the walking wounded.

Emotional wounds may take time to manifest for several reasons. First, the victim of trauma may not realize how hurt he or she is from the threat or assault. Second, we all have a natural tendency to cover up a wound. If our arm gets hurt, we instinctively put our other hand over it. If our head hurts, we place our hands on the ache. But when a wound is so deep we cannot put our hands on it, we find emotional ways to cover it up.

Third, a victim of PTSD may live with shame about feeling hurt, vulnerable or powerless. The survivor may want to deny the effects of trauma or pretend it did not happen. He or she wants to get on living a normal life.

PTSD symptoms and reactions

Regardless of the traumatic event that caused them, the pattern of PTSD symptoms tends to be consistent. Identifying these symptoms helps survivors and spouses understand how the disorder affects their marriage. Organizations such as the National Center for PTSD review the warning signs of PTSD.

The four general PTSD symptom areas are:

  • Re-experiencing the trauma.
  • Avoidance.
  • Hyperarousal.
  • Changes in beliefs and mood.

Here’s what these symptoms may look like on a daily basis. Survivors may:

  • Disconnect (emotionally detach) from interpersonal relationships and avoid interaction with others.
  • Shut down or become emotionally numb.
  • Use anger and irritability to push away the spouse or caregiver, yielding the high price of toxicity to intimacy.
  • Act out aggressively, both verbally and physically. (Spouses of veterans with PTSD experience more violence, often requiring significant intervention for the spouse’s safety and protection.)
  • Avoid going out in public because of fear, heightened sensitivity and hypervigilance for threats.
  • Sit against a wall with a clear view of doors and exits when in public.
  • Struggle with sleep because of fear, a heightened alertness to sounds or nightmares.
  • Display addictive behavior such as workaholism to avoid and distract from the trauma.

These behaviors affect marriages in a number of ways, but those with the most impact are emotional detachment, numbness, anger and irritability.

PTSD effects upon marriage

Not only can PTSD drive a wedge between a husband and wife, it can devastate marriages. A research article from the National Center for PTSD shows veterans with PTSD have more marital problems than veterans without the condition. Survivors suppress their thoughts and feelings from their partner, worry more about intimacy issues and have lower sexual interest and satisfaction. Research found Vietnam veterans with PTSD got divorced twice as much as those without PTSD, had shorter relationships and were three times more likely to have two or more divorces.

Spouses of Vietnam veterans reported less happiness and life satisfaction, more discouragement, and felt emotionally overwhelmed. Even husbands of female veterans with PTSD reported a lower sense of well-being and more social isolation.

The research on spouses of noncombat PTSD survivors seems to be more limited, but the spouses of people who were raped, threatened at gunpoint or lived through a natural disaster are likely to struggle with similar effects.

PTSD inner injury and marriage

PTSD wounds the intimacy in marriage because it dismantles the emotional connection. Emotional intimacy is formed through a developmental process. The prerequisite conditions for intimacy include safety, trust, power,control and esteem.

A key way that trauma injures these preconditions for intimacy is by changing or reinforcing beliefs. For example, as a child you may have believed I am safe or the world is OK to explore because your parents protected you, you lived in a safe neighborhood, and the people around you were kind and respectful. However, those trust beliefs may change to people are dangerous and I could get hurt after a traumatic event. Even without basis, survivors could apply and overgeneralize faulty beliefs toward their spouses. It’s nearly impossible to be emotionally intimate when a victim believes his or her spouse is a threat.

Likewise, trust is another vital precondition to intimacy, but trauma also erodes trust-forming beliefs, such as I don’t know who I can trust and I can’t trust anyone. Trauma can make the survivor feel powerless and out of control, which can lead to thoughts such as Others will take advantage of me, I will be abused or I must be in control.

Self-esteem is another key precondition for intimacy; an important principle here is that identity precedes intimacy. Developmentally, we form our identity in our late teens and early 20s, deciding what career we will pursue, whether we will go to college, enter the military or learn a trade. Typically, once someone decides “Who am I?” that person moves on to addressing “Whom do I want to be with?”

But, when trauma attacks esteem, the survivor may feel devalued as a person — he may feel like a replaceable part. She may feel she deserves punishment. If a trauma survivor thinks he is no longer loveable and he dislikes himself, he cannot perceive that others still love him and receive love from them. A trauma survivor may think, How could you really love me when I don’t like myself?

Care for the PTSD caregiver

Hope found that being a spouse and caregiver to a trauma survivor challenged her own emotional stability. She wanted to help Phil bear his burden (Galatians 6:2), but he kept pushing her away. As she carried greater responsibility for the tasks around the house and within the family, she felt her needs were unmet.

A friend invited her to a support group for wives of men with PTSD. There she learned about “caregiver burden.” She discovered that caregivers often suffer emotional fatigue and detach from the spouse with PTSD. Hope realized she needed to take care of her own mental, emotional, physical and spiritual needs as she and Phil walked through a long and winding valley of life together.

Spouses of veterans with PTSD are more likely to develop mental health problems than are spouses of veterans without the disorder. Often the victim’s ordeal triggers a secondary traumatization toward his spouse. The survivor may displace outrage onto his caregiver, mirroring the anger he received from the traumatic event. This could even take the form of physical aggression and domestic violence. Some PTSD experts suggest caregivers can even form “vicarious PTSD,” a strong empathy that elicits symptoms of despair in the caregiver. It is vitally important that PTSD caregivers take care of themselves.

Treatment for PTSD

The good news is that a person who suffers trauma can recover. Mental health professionals do not use the word cure because it implies that all the symptoms will go away and never return. But survivors can improve and lessen the effects of PTSD on themselves and their marriages.

According to the National Center for PTSD, 53 percent of those who received trauma-focused psychotherapy and 42 percent who took medication improved to the level their symptoms no longer met PTSD diagnosis criteria. A spouse must encourage the trauma survivor to get treatment, because PTSD is unlikely to go away on its own.

With encouragement from Phil’s doctors and Hope, Phil joined group therapy. He realized he was not alone and that others had experienced situations similar to his. The group helped him feel less socially isolated as he learned about interpersonal relationships. He learned how to regulate and manage his emotions better, becoming less angry and more engaged. He used what he learned to strengthen his marriage.

Experts have developed several types of evidence-based psychotherapies for PTSD. Treatment can reduce PTSD and related depression over the course of 12 to 16 sessions. One is cognitive processing therapy (CPT), a type of cognitive behavioral therapy for individuals or groups. Trauma survivors can make substantial progress in the recovery process due to changing their thoughts and beliefs. Therapists teach survivors how to identify unhealthy thoughts, challenge those mindsets and install new thoughts. CPT aligns with the principle from 2 Corinthians 10:5 to “bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.” There are also other individual therapies for PTSD such as prolonged exposure therapy, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and Skills Training and Affective Interpersonal Regulation (STAIR).

A beneficial treatment for couples is Cognitive-Behavioral Conjoint Therapy. It is designed to reduce individual PTSD symptoms and improve relationships. Similar to CPT, the survivor and spouse work to identify the thoughts and behaviors of PTSD and how those symptoms affect their relationship.

Recovering your intimacy

While emotional intimacy is usually a marriage’s foundation, PTSD can severely erode it. Many couples lose hope for the relationship. But hope abounds through therapy and through spiritual resources.

Physical intimacy between two bodies is an expression of sexual, romantic love, but it is not enough to sustain a marriage. Emotional intimacy is a deeper soul-to-soul connection of friendship love with the mind, will and emotions. But it can still be a conditional love: “I will love you as a friend as long as (fill in the blank).”

But there is a deeper type of spirit-to-spirit intimacy, based upon the more enduring, unconditional agape love. It is not based on feelings or the spouse’s behavior but on the decision and will of the lover. This is God’s type of unconditional love for us, which we can share with our spouses. This type of spiritual love “bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13:7-8, NKJV).

Agape love can provide the resilience you need to help you and your spouse recover from PTSD. God desires to heal the brokenhearted and bind up the wounds (Psalm 147:3) of the PTSD survivor and the caregiver. His love can help you be hopeful in your marriage.

Resources for PTSD recovery

Caregivers and victims of PTSD should seek help to recover. Here’s a short list of resources to get you started:

* Hope and Phil are a fictional couple; however, their struggle represents those various individuals and couples with whom Dr. Vaughan has worked.

A variety of marital issues can lead to challenges or even hopelessness for one or both spouses in a marriage. Gaining a sense of hope and direction often requires understanding the underlying issues and relationship patterns which may have led to the crisis. Reach out to well-trained helpers even if you are the only person in the marriage willing to take action at this time. We can guide you as you seek a referral and take your first steps toward recovery. You can contact us Monday through Friday from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. (Mountain time) at: 855-771-HELP (4357) or [email protected] www.FocusontheFamily.com/Counseling

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There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
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A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!