As a parent and grandparent, should I step in to help if I feel that my son-in-law is not caring properly for my daughter and my grandchildren? What makes this especially difficult is that his actions (or lack thereof) could put his family’s safety at risk. For example, he constantly forgets to put oil in …
Ages 19+ (Adult Children) Q&A
What kind of standards of conduct and behavior should parents impose upon an adult child living in their home? Our single 29-year-old daughter lives with us in separate quarters off of the main house. She knows how deeply we feel about marriage as the only appropriate context for sexual expression, but she’s made a habit …
How do I know when it’s time to ask my adult child to leave?
Now that our son is over 18, should he still obey us?
How do we deal with an adult child who has no job, is living in our basement, and drawing heavily on our financial resources? My husband and I can’t agree on the best way to handle this situation, and it’s becoming a real strain on our relationship. What should we do?
Is it normal for married adult children to become disconnected from their parents? There’s a coldness, distance, and separation that’s crept into my relationship with my adult daughter, and I think her spouse may have something to do with it. What have I done wrong? How do I show my concern and let her know …
Should we provide financial assistance to our middle-aged adult children? Our son-in-law just lost his job. He’s always made a good living but has struggled with serious health issues that have placed a burden on their finances. Our daughter has never once offered to help with their income by seeking work of any kind. I’m …
Should we force our 18-year-old son to worship with us? He’s a Christian but recently decided to stop going to church. Since he lives in our home and we still support him, we think he should follow the rules we establish. But we don’t want to drive him away from the Lord.
How can we make our grown child’s move back home a smooth and easy transition? Just as we were looking forward to the freedom of an “empty nest,” our daughter decided that she needs to come back and “get her life together” before “moving on to the next step.” The problem is that we don’t …
Why is it so difficult raising adolescents nowadays? I understand that it’s supposed to be a process of gradually letting go, granting them more independence, and setting them free to become the adults God wants them to be. But while I know all this in my head, there are days when I just can’t put …
Should parents come to the rescue when grown and married children need monetary assistance? Our daughter and her husband are struggling, and we’d like to help them out. But we don’t want to set an unhealthy precedent or cross a boundary. How do you think we should handle this?
Should we allow our struggling grown child to move back in with us? Our son recently got divorced. Then he lost his job and started drinking heavily again. He seems to have no sense of direction and now he wants to move back in with us. We’re not sure if this would be the best …
How can I instill a solid Christian character into my child? Most of the parenting materials I’ve seen have a great deal to say about discipline, mental and emotional health, obedience and order in the home. Unfortunately, there isn’t much out there on the subject of character development, especially from a Christian perspective. Do you …
As a Christian father, should I give my daughter away at the wedding if she’s marrying a non-believer? Over the more than twenty years of our marriage we’ve worked hard to raise her in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Her decision has come as a great disappointment to us. We love our daughter, …
As Christian parents, should we attend our son’s wedding if he’s marrying an non-believer? Over the more than twenty years of our marriage we’ve worked hard to raise him in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Now, to our great disappointment, he has made a decision to marry a non-Christian. We love our child, …
Are we right to be worried about our daughter’s decision to move in with her boyfriend? When we found out she that she was living with him, we told her we felt it was immoral. She said our values were “old fashioned” and argued that living together is the best way to test a couple’s …
How should we parent a grown child when there are also two younger children in the home? We have three kids altogether: a boy and a girl who are still in high school, and an older son in his mid-20s. The oldest has had some tough luck recently and needs to move back home for …
Before we agree to allow our adult child to move back in with us, are there some key things we ought to consider or any safeguards we need to put in place? Our thirty-year-old daughter has just completed drug rehab and we’re giving careful thought to the option of letting her come back home until …
How can we help our grown son choose better girlfriends? He’s still living with us, and we’re anxious to see him “grow up,” move out on his own and get married. He’s brought several girls home to meet us over the past few years, but so far he’s shown very poor judgment and we haven’t …
How can we best relate to our grown child who has completely rejected his Christian faith and upbringing? After graduating from high school he moved in with his girlfriend and became involved with drug and alcohol abuse. Our hearts ache to reach out to him, but we don’t want to appear to be condoning his …