John Fuller: Last time on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly, Rob Parsons recounted the powerful tale of the prodigal son.
Excerpt:
Rob Parsons: It’s the ancient story of the boy who broke his father’s heart. And he went to a far country and one day he ends up in a pig sty somewhere and he thinks, “I wanna go home.” And he makes up a speech. And I’m no doubt as he’s walking home, he is rehearsing that little speech in his heart. What he doesn’t know is every day since he left, the old man has climbed onto the flat roof of the little house and he’s looking down the road. And when he sees his boy, he starts to run.
End of Excerpt
John: It’s a parable that has a lot to teach those of us who have prodigal children. And that’s our topic today. Thanks for joining us. I’m John Fuller.
Jim Daly: Rob is a very powerful speaker, and if you couldn’t be with us last time, I want to encourage you to get the CD or audio download because there’s so much meat in there that will be helpful to the parent whose heart is heavy for their prodigal.
John: And you can find those online resources at FocusontheFamily.com/broadcast. You can also request Rob’s book, called Bringing Home the Prodigals, which is kind of the foundation for today’s presentation. Or call us for details. Our number is 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY.
(800) 232-6459.
Jim: Rob shares many stories in his presentation. And last time, he cautioned us not to have a critical spirit toward our children. And I can tell you, I’ve been guilty of that.
John: Well, me too, Jim. And I don’t know many people who haven’t said that.
Jim: It’s kind of a normal parenting thing.
John: Mm-hmm.
Jim: Another point Rob made is that sometimes parents of prodigals carry needless guilt. It’s a heavy burden. And I’m sure there are things that you could have done better, but you only have today and tomorrow. So let’s move forward and build bridges, not wallow in that regret.
John: Mm, good points. And uh, here now is Rob Parsons speaking at a Focus on the Family event in Naples, Florida, a few years back.
Rob: A young man told me an amazing story some years ago, it happened in the States. He said he wanted so much for his father to come to Christ. He said, “I’ve asked my father to come and hear the greatest preachers in America.” He said, “Billy Graham and Louis Palau, I’ve sent him books and DVDs. My father would not come to Christ. And I get the news that daddy’s dying. He’s in a hospital thousands of miles away. I ring the hospital, I say, ‘I wanna be with my dad as he dies.’ They say, ‘Come and sleep in little cot at the end of his bed.'”
And he said, “I get there, and they discover I’m involved in a family ministry, and they asked me to speak at chapel. My father’s not there, but I talk about my heart for my father. And listening is a young man in a wheelchair. He has Down Syndrome, but he’s got a lot of other problems apart from that. Can’t keep his head still, there’s saliva running down his face.” But he is listening intently as Gary speaks. He said, “When I finish speaking, the matron comes and says, ‘Sir, there’s a lady that needs family counseling. Could you help her?’ He said, ‘Send her to my dad’s room tomorrow.'” And he said, “I’m in my dad’s room and I’m counseling her. And the door to the corridor is open and I see a movement. And it’s this young man in the wheelchair. And she says, ‘I’m sorry, it’s my son.’ ‘Oh no, he’s fine.’ And we keep talking. But now the young man has brought his wheelchair into the room, and now he’s right by my father’s bed. And now we stop talking because he has one arm on my father’s hand and one hand in the air. He begins to pray for my father’s soul.”
He said, “Two days later, my dad said to me, ‘Son, it’s time I gave my life to Christ.'”
And you know, ladies and gentlemen, sometimes we have to realize only God can do this. There is no better place to bring your prodigal than the foot of his cross. Sometimes we try so hard. We we’re always sending books, we’re always… There’s nothing wrong with that. But we need to know God can do this. We are thrown on him. And when we lay the guilt down, hope rises.
Let me say this, some of your prodigals are not as far from God as you think. They are quite a distance from your particular Christian culture, but some of them are not quite as far from God as you think.
My mind goes to a woman of 45, the secretary of a very wealthy businessman in England. And he said to me, “Rob, I have taken her to so many meetings, she will not come to Christ. I’ve had evangelists in my office speaking to her. She lives with this man. She has now a little baby. She has begged him to marry her, but he won’t marry her.”
And at the end of our meeting, he called her and asked her to give me a lift to the station. She got in the car, she said, “You know, Rob, last night I went to hear your wife Diane talk in a seminar, motherhood, a rollercoaster ride.” She said, “Diane made me laugh and she made me cry.” She said, “You know, I’m not a Christian, don’t you Rob?” I said, “Oh yes, I, I, I know that.” She said, “Where are you going when you leave us? I said, I’m gonna speak to some church leaders about a little book I’ve written called Bringing Home the Prodigals. Susie, did you ever know that little story?” “Oh yes. When I was a little girl, I, I went to a Methodist church, and they taught me the story there.”
“Did you ever go to church now, Susie?” Her head went down, “No, no, I don’t go now.” And then I felt God prompt me and I said, “Susie, I don’t wanna offend you. You’ve told me you’re not a Christian, I understand that. But Susie, do you ever pray?” She said, “I pray all the time I can’t stop praying.” She said, “The other night, I’m lying on my bed, I’m crying out to God. And my partner says, ‘Who are you talking to?’ And I say, ‘I’m talking to God.'” She said, “I think he’s kind of jealous, Rob.” I said, “Susie, would you mind if I told you a little story?”
I said, “A couple of years ago I was speaking at a big convention, 4,000 people. And I spoke for three quarters of an hour. And when I finished, a man got up and told a story. And I knew in my heart when he finished telling it, and it only took him two minutes to tell, if he told it at the beginning, I’d never have spoken. That’s pretty sobering for a preacher.” She said, “Tell it to me.”
I said, “Well, Jeff told us he had a great relationship with his mom and his dad. But in his eighties, his father had a stroke, was unable to speak. And Jeff’s dad loved to speak to him. And Jeff rang his mom one day and said, ‘Mum, I’m doing some business near your home. Can I come and stay the night?’ She said, ‘Of course son.'”
And he said, “It’s 11 o’clock at night and we’re drinking cocoa. And mom and I are speaking with great animation, but my old dad can only smile at me.” And he said, “About 11:30 I go off to bed. They’ve given me the old bedroom I had when I was a boy. And I’m lying there, and there’s even one of my old posters still on part of the wall. And I’m lying and my mind’s going back over years of childhood. And I begin to fall off to sleep, and suddenly there’s a knock at the door. And I’m a bit surprised by that. But I shout, ‘Come in,’ and, and in comes my old dad. And he comes to the bed and he looks down at me and he sees there’s a hair in my eye. And he licks his finger, and he pushes it back across my forehead. And then as he used to when I was a boy, he tucked the bed clothes in around me and straightened the top sheet. And then he leant over me, kissed me, smiled and left.”
And he said, “I’m lying there, and I am 45 years of age, and I’ve got kids of my own, and I’ve got people who work for me, and I have just been tucked into bed by my own father. And boy, didn’t it feel good?”
And Jeff looked out at 4,000 people and said, “God wants to do that for you.”
And I said, “Susie, He wants to do it for you.” She wrote to me the next day, she said, “Thank you for your wise words. You made me think.” I sent her a book I wrote, she wrote back to say she was praying for me.
Ladies and gentlemen, I have no idea where Susie is on a journey of faith, but I know this. It is better to have some love for God, so you cry out to Him in the darkness, but to be too ashamed to go to church, than to be in church every single Sunday, but in your heart for there to be no love.
And sometimes we have to say, “Heavenly Father, help me cooperate with the Holy Spirit in understanding where you are working in this life. So that first I see, not the things that others see, but begin to see what You may yet do.” And as we do, hope rises in our hearts.
John: You’re listening today to Focus on the Family with Jim Daly and that’s Rob Parsons. And uh, you can find more encouragement in his book, Bringing Home The Prodigals. Uh, we’ll send that to you for a donation of any amount to the ministry today. And we’ll also include a free audio download of his entire presentation so you can listen to it again and maybe pass that along to somebody. Donate today and request those at FocusontheFamily.com/broadcast. Or call for details. Our number is 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY. 800-232-6459. Let’s return now, to more from Rob Parsons on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly.
Rob: I just wanna share briefly with you those final two points that God laid on my heart. Number one was, we have made prodigals of some who never were. Secondly, lay down the guilt. And thirdly, and I have to say, I believe this is at the heart of it, when the Father’s house is filled with the Father’s love, the prodigals will come home. But fourthly, when they do come home, pray with all your heart, they meet the Father before they meet the elder brother.
The religious leader said, “Why do you eat with sinners?” And He told them three stories. He told them the story of a sheep that was lost away from home. And then He told them the story of a coin that was lost at home. And finally He told them story of two boys. And one was lost away from home, and one was lost at home.
I remember a theologian saying to me years ago, “The kiss of the father was an incredible kiss.” I say, “Why so?” He said, “Well, but the boy would’ve still been smelling of the pig sty. This father did not say, ‘Go home, have a wash.’ This is a Jewish father embracing the boy smelling of the pig sty. The father will be patient. The elder brother will want it all sorted out immediately. The elder brother will say, ‘Can I smell alcohol on your breath, you still doing this? You still doing that?’ But the father will be patient. The father will know this is gonna take a little time.”
I think of a boy who said to his dad, “Dad, I am back, both to you and to God, but be patient with me. This may take a little time.” The power of the father and the spirit of the elder brother.
The church I mentioned to you some time ago that began at 300 and grew to 10,000. The vicar told me that one of his members had a hairdressing salon and a young stripper from a local strip club, she was only 25 years of age, used to come have her hair done there. And one day she said to him, “Why don’t you try and sleep with me like all the other men do?” He said, “I have different values.” She said, “I’ll bet you go to church, don’t you?” He said, “I do.” She said, “I’d like to come to your church.”
He said, “But I didn’t wanna bring her to our church. We were a happy, respectable little family church.” He said, “I didn’t wanna bring her to our church. And I knew what she’d wear if she came. And she did when she came, she came straight from the club.” The pastor told me, he said, “When she walked down the aisle, I saw women put in their hands over the husband’s eyes.” Again. She sat in the front row. After 10 minutes she turned to the man who bought her and said, “Did you tell the preacher about me?”
“No, I didn’t tell him about you. He knows all about me. He knows everything about my life.” She gave her life to Christ that night, they gave her a Bible. That was the Sunday. On the Wednesday she rang the pastor, “Pastor, it’s Nicki.” “Nicki?” “The stripper.” “Oh, oh, the stripper.” He said, “I got my wife on the other extension.” “Pastor, thank you for the Bible. Pastor, do you read the Bible?” “Yes, Nicki. I read the Bible.” “Pastor, have you read the Corinthian book?” “Yes, Nicki. I’ve read the Corinthian book.” “Pastor, have you read the part where it says, our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit?” “Yes. Nicki, I’ve read that.”
“Well Pastor, if that’s true, I can’t go on stripping. Pastor, have you read the Matthew book?” “Yes, Nicki, I’ve read the Matthew book.” “Pastor, have you read the bit where says that God looks after the birds of the air and the grass of the field? I think if that’s true, if I give up stripping, he’ll give me enough to wear and to eat, I’ll be okay.” She walked into the club on the Friday. She said, “I’m not gonna do this anymore.” When she got baptized, six weeks later, five other strippers and four doormen came to church. They didn’t come to church ’cause they wanted to. They came for Nicki’s sake, and they came in the clothes they wore in the club. The pastor said, “This time I saw women putting black plastic bags over their husbands’ heads.”
Several of those women and those men came to Christ that night. On the Monday morning there was a knock on the pastor’s door. It was an older woman from church. “Pastor,” she said, “You have ruined this church. You have ruined this church bringing these people in. We were a little happy, respectable church. What’s this gonna say to the young people? You have ruined this church.”
If she’d said it to me, I think I’d have got on my high horse about Jesus eating with sinners. But he was brighter than me. He said, “I know I’ve ruined your church. What are we gonna do about it? Will you help me mentor some of these young women?” And he said it was as if heaven itself held its breath waiting for her answer. He said, “Finally she knelt forward. She tapped me on the knee, and said, ‘Well Pastor, we’re just gonna have to love them.'”
My hat goes off to that woman, because of course it was hard for her. And she may have had the spirit of the elder brother or elder sister, but something went on in that woman’s heart that changed her. My heart goes out to her.
Ladies and gentlemen, when they come home, pray with all your heart they meet the Father before they meet the elder brother. And finally, pray. Those of us who pray for prodigals have a great advantage. We have broken hearts. We know no book or seminar is gonna bring our prodigals home. We are thrown on God. God likes us to pray like that.
You know, ladies and gentlemen, wherever we go with a full program, my wife Diane always comes, and she asks people to stand and pray with her for the children. For their own children, or if they don’t have children for children that matter to them, and the university students in their city, and then for the children of the nation.
And if she were here now, she would ask you to stand and pray for the children of your nation. She’d pray for them when they’re still in the womb. Pray for them about the partners they may meet, pray for them. And then she would encourage you to pray with each other. If you’re a single parent, mom or dad, find someone you can pray with for your children. And then she would say this, “If you are a married couple, pray together for your children.” Then she would say this, “It is staggering how many married couples do not pray together.” Ladies and gentlemen, pray together. Pray together. I know it’s hard. I know it can be embarrassing. But begin this very day, even if going home in the car you say, “You know darling, we, we could meet tonight, and we’ll just say the Lord’s prayer together.” And then when you finish saying that lovely prayer, for Thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory. Just for 10 seconds, “Lord bless Peter, wherever he is. Bless Susie, wherever he is.” Pray for your kids!
If any of you are pregnant now, pray for the child in the womb. And if you have children and they’re doing well in the faith, pray for them to hold on. Don’t take anything for granted. Anything can happen to anybody.
I’ll never forget being in New York Subway and we’ve all got our noses in our newspapers, and a young homeless man comes on pitching for money, and we all sink our heads in the sports page. And then he shouts out, “Ladies and gentlemen, I haven’t always been like this. And you should all know that anything can happen to anybody.” And now we lift our heads, ’cause now we know there’s a philosopher on the train. And he’s right, anything can happen to anybody. Pray for your kids.
Keep on praying. It’s not only our only hope, it’s our last hope. I can’t promise you your prodigals will come home, but I can tell you this, God loves them more than you. He knows where they are and only He can bring them home.
Whenever I think about this issue, I think about the way Yancey tells it. The, not a story of a prodigal son, but a prodigal daughter. She has a row with a father about the length of a skirt or the pin in the nose or the color of her hair. And she walks outta their home in little Traverse city and she goes to the place she knows her father will never find her, big Detroit city. The second she gets off the Greyhound bus, there’s a businessman waiting to meet her. He puts her in a penthouse of a hotel, men pay big money for this young girl, and for two years she lives like a queen.
Then the drugs get to her, and she’s ill and he takes her out of the penthouse. And she’s sleeping in the shop doorway, and she’s got newspaper around and cardboard underneath her and a hacking cough. And her mind goes back to home. She remembers apple blossoms in spring. She remembers a brown Labrador dog bouncing through the garden towards her. And she thinks, “I wanna go home.” And she phones her mum and dad, and she gets the answer phone, and she says, “Mum, dad, I wanna come home. My bus gets into Traverse city at midnight. If there’s nobody to meet me, I’ll understand. I’ll get straight back on the bus; I’ll stay on the bus all the way to Canada.” It’s a long way from Detroit city to Traverse city. And it gets dark, starts to snow, and she falls asleep. And then there’s a hiss of breaks and she hears the bus driver say, Traverse City folks we’re just here for 15 minutes. And she thinks, “15 minutes to decide my life.”
She gets the lipstick from her teeth. She tries to rub the nicotine off her fingers; she straightens her blouse. She wonders if there’ll be anybody to meet her. Nothing she ever imagined or dreamt of got her ready for the sight she saw that night when she entered the little bus station in Traverse city. 30, 40 people with party hats on and banners that said, “Welcome home darling,” uncles and aunties and a grandmother and a great-grandmother to boot. And there’s her mother. And here’s her father walking towards her with tears streaming down his face. And she says, “Daddy, I am so sorry.”
“Hush child. We don’t have time for that. We’re gonna be late for the party.”
It’s an incredible story. Just after I wrote the book, a woman wrote to me, I don’t know if she was the kind of woman who wrote this letter to her daughter. “You might be surprised to hear from me. It is some time since we spoke and even longer since we were together. But I’ve rewound and reworded our last conversation and relived our last meeting many times in my heart and imagination. Words passed between us that would have been best left unsaid. But not all memories are painful. I often wind the tape back further like a video film and watch you as a child clambering on a rocky beach or running with an excited smile to show me some treasure. I can still feel your hand in mind as you urge me to hurry along a windy street or held me back because you wanted to watch a tiny insect or an even slower caterpillar.
“I remember you as you grew, the challenges you faced in the friends you made the pride I felt. And then I wonder when things started to go wrong. When we stopped talking and started shouting, when even the shouting gave way to silence, and the silence to absence. You have walked a path in these last days I would not have chosen for you, but as you often have said, it is your life, and you must choose for yourself. And I have accepted those choices; however different they may be from my own. I want you to know though that my love for you is greater than those differences. That despite all that has built a barrier between us, the love I have for you is strong enough to move it, even piece by piece and however long it takes. Both of us need the forgiveness of the other. We need to hear words we’ve longed for. I believe it is never too late.
“You may choose to ignore these words. They may make you angry, rekindling memories you thought you had long forgotten. I understand that. But as your mother, I can do nothing but go on loving you. Go on asking for your forgiveness and offering mine to you. No matter what has happened in the past and whatever is going on in your life right now, I love you. I am here for you, and you can always come home.”
Let me end with this. Woman wrote to me, she said, “When my daughter left at 18, both away from us and God, we didn’t see her for six years. We didn’t know whether she was alive or dead. And as my husband and I put the lights out at night, I would say, ‘Darling, leave a porch light on.’
“I always left the light on.” And she said, “At Christmas, I used to put a little Christmas tree outside as we used to when she was a little girl. And when my daughter came home both wonderfully to us and to God, she said, ‘Mom, I was too ashamed to come home. But some nights in the early hours of the morning, one or two o’clock in the morning, I would come into our street and I would sit in my car in the darkness and every house would be dark apart from our house, you always left a light on. And some nights I would look at the little Christmas tree you put there, and I knew it was for me.'”
Ladies and gentlemen don’t ever give up hope. Always keep on praying and always leave a light on. May God bless you.
John: Well, only God knows how our small acts of faith can work in His plan of redemption. And our thanks to Rob Parsons for a terrific message of hope on today’s episode of Focus on the Family with Jim Daly.
Jim: You know John, uh, I’m sure there are many listening who know the pain of carrying a burden for a prodigal child. And I pray that they’ll not lose heart, uh, that they’ll continue to bring their prodigal to the foot of the cross in prayer. And that their prodigal will eventually see that there is a light on for them when they decide to come home.
John: Mm. Yeah. I can’t help but wonder if we might even have a few prodigals who have heard this very message and they’re wondering right now, “After all this time, could, could I go back? Would I be welcomed home?”
Jim: Man, let it be so. Let me speak directly to those prodigals. Please let this image soak into your heart and mind. God, the Father is up on the rooftop watching for you to come home. And just like in the Bible story, while you’re still a long way off, God is going to come running to you with open arms. And I hope that if that’s you today, you’ll contact us to find out how you can start on the path back home to Him.
John: Yeah, we’d love to hear from you. Our number is (800), the letter A, and the word FAMILY. (800) 232-6459. Uh, you can also look for a free article we have on our website called Coming Home. Uh, you’ll find that at FocusontheFamily.com/broadcast.
Jim: Now for the parents out there whose hearts are breaking for their prodigal child, please note we are here for you. Our friendly staff would love to hear your story, pray for you and your child. And if needed, you can request a call back from one of our caring Christian Counselors. It’s a free service that we are pleased to provide thanks to our donors.
And if Focus on the Family has been there for you in the past, can I encourage you to pay it forward by making a monthly pledge to the ministry? Here’s a great example from a woman named Barb. She said this, “I am donating to say thank you for the free counseling call I received from Focus. The woman who spoke with me was so much better than a secular counselor. Her voice was like a beam of light giving me hope. I hope you can continue providing this service to other listeners.”
John: Mm.
Jim: That’s great.
John: That’s wonderful to know that we could be there for her.
Jim: Yeah, and if you can make a monthly pledge of any amount, we’d be happy to send you a copy of Rob Parsons’ book, Bringing Home The Prodigals, and we’ll include a free audio download of this entire presentation so that you can share it with your spouse.
And if you can’t afford to make a monthly pledge right now, we get it. We’ll send you the book for a one-time gift as well.
By the way, this year’s special edition print from Morgan Weisling features the Prodigal Son’s Homecoming. So it’s apropos that we should mention it. I’d encourage you to request a copy to display in your home, as a reminder of God’s ultimate hope for your prodigal.
John: Hmm. Yeah, it’s a great reminder that the Father forgives all of us. So check it out and request Rob’s book at FocusontheFamily.com/broadcast. Or call and we can tell you more over the phone. Our number is 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY. That’s (800) 232-6459.
On behalf of the team, thanks for listening today to Focus on the Family with Jim Daly. I’m John Fuller, inviting you back as we once again help you and your family thrive in Christ.
