Custom CSS of Section contains Conditional Preview for See Life Campaign Elements

Share Your Story Header CTA is Shown by Optimize Experiment in FOTF Container

Focus on the Family Broadcast

Making Peace With Unfulfilled Dreams

Making Peace With Unfulfilled Dreams

If, when you were younger, you had big hopes and dreams for your life that haven't come true, author Chrystal Evans Hurst will encourage you to believe that it's never too late to re-discover your identity in God and reclaim those dreams from long ago.

Opening:

Excerpt:

Chrystal Evans Hurst: You may think it’s too late, but if it’s still in you, it’s not. I think if we will just honor with what we know, even if it’s just one step, then God continues to light our path with what He wants to teach us after.

End of Excerpt

John Fuller: That’s Chrystal Evans Hurst. And she’s our guest today on Focus on the Family, with your host Focus president and author Jim Daly. And I’m John Fuller.

Jim Daly: You know, as a little girl, so many of you listening right now probably had big hopes and dreams for your life. You envisioned what you wanted to be when you grew up. You imagined what your spouse might be like and, uh, maybe even the number of children you’d have when you got married. And then one day, reality sets in, and those dreams no longer seem attainable; they’re out of your reach. Those aspirations disappear with everyday circumstances and responsibilities. And that heart of your inner child is swept aside as you grow up and take your place in the world with all the things that you do as an adult.

Today, we want to help you, uh, deal with those unfulfilled dreams and learn to rekindle your childhood aspirations by obeying God and making the most of everyday life. Um, the apostle Paul put it best in Philippians 4:11 where he said, “For I have learned in whatever situation I am in to be content.” And, of course, that’s a process. But Chrystal Evans Hurst is here to help all of us get on that path today. She’s been on that road of discontentment before, and she understands what you may be facing. And her insights and advice are going to be worthwhile.

John: Mmhmm. Chrystal is a gifted writer, a speaker, a worship leader. And, uh, she is the eldest child of our good friend Dr. Tony Evans and his wife, Lois. And, uh, Chrystal is married to Jessie. They have five children. And, Jim, she’s also a grandmother as well.

Body:

Jim: Amazing. Chrystal, welcome to Focus.

Chrystal: Thank you so much for having me.

Jim: We love, uh, your dad. He’s been on the program many, many times. And your mom – what a wonderful, uh, heritage that they have given you kids, I hope, but not without pain I’m sure, right? So give us a little secret insight into Dr. Tony Evans, being the daughter.

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: Well, you know, I always say is – it’s very true, and I – it’s – I’m not just saying this because, you know, it’s the right thing to say it’s true – he was always dad first before he was Dr. Tony Evans.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: And because we really didn’t see, um, you know, a major difference between – or minor difference between who he was at church and who he was at home, um, he was always dad first. And he always put the commitment that he had to our spiritual health as a family, um, first. I mean, it was very clear that he was interested not just in the church.

Jim: Uh, what are you hearing from women about the unfulfilled dreams in their lives? Really, your book basis – She’s Still There.

Chrystal: Well, the main thing I would say is that there are women who feel lost. It’s not that there’s not good stuff happening in their life, or it may be bad, but the common statement is, “I’m kind of lost in the middle of my life,” uh, whether those be unfulfilled dreams, or “I started fulfilling them and got off track,” or “I never believed that the dreams that I had were capable – I was capable of fulfilling them.” And so, um, the hope that I wanted to offer women in this book was that, uh, loss does not mean that you’re without life. And if you still have life, if you still have breath, then it’s never too late to look at what God wants to do in and through you.

Jim: Let’s look at your life as an example of what you’re talking about. Um, what was it like in the early days? What were you dreaming about as a little girl?

Chrystal: You know what? I’m one of those people that probably had, like, 25 dreams, actually.

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: Twenty-five things you wanted to be.

Chrystal: Twenty-five things I wanted to be. But here…

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: Here’s the connective tissue.

Jim: That’s normal.

Chrystal: The connective tissue is that I’m firstborn, typical achiever type. And so, um, I definitely wanted to just go hard and far with whatever that thing would be. Actress, singer, writer, teacher, author – those were all on the list. Um, the challenge was, I just made some choices in my late teenage years, um, that rendered a lot of those – like, can I actually get up from that? And so that was kind of my lost feeling in life. Can I actually be the best at whatever God wants me to be given my circumstances?

Jim: Well, in that case, to fill that picture in a little bit, because I think a lot of women will relate to that experience, describe what was happening in your teenage years.

Chrystal: Sure. I – um, at 19, I had my first daughter. I was single. I was in college. And so the question then becomes, how can the daughter or one of the daughters of Tony Evans, um, you know, end up as a teenage mom? I remember actually sitting with my dad at the table, and we would watch shows on TV, and he would talk about statistics. And I remember him saying to me, “I just” – and saying to all of us – “I just don’t want you to be a statistic.” And I remember thinking that at 19 – how did I become a statistic? Um, the reality is it was just teenage love, and I was at college with the guy and did not handle that freedom well. Um, a lot of people will make assumptions that “Oh, yup, you know, those preacher’s kids, you know, they just are shut up, and then as soon as they get out, they go wild.” That actually wasn’t my story. I was actually a pretty good kid, wanted to do the right thing, um, was committed to my relationship with the Lord, but we all make mistakes.

So at 19, I had my first daughter. She’s 26 now. And while I worked hard to finish school because I’m an achiever, I do remember thinking, “Can I actually recover who I was supposed to be? Can I move forward in my life because of this?” And I felt lost for a long time because of that.

Jim: Yeah. I mean, and, again, I think a lot of women in that spot made mistakes, maybe not all in the sexual area…

Chrystal: Sure.

Jim: …But certainly made mistakes in one way or another. How does that little girl inside you begin to die, I guess, in some ways? Because all of a sudden, now you have all this responsibility and big decisions to make. How do you cope with that? When you were 19, what – how did that conversation go with your mom and dad?

Chrystal: Oh, well, um, yeah, probably still to this day, that’s probably one of the hardest conversations – well, I’ll say it is the hardest conversation I’ve ever had to have. I think I called my house – has to have been seven or eight times.

Jim: Yeah, and hung up?

Chrystal: And my dad kept picking up the phone.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: And I kept saying, “Where’s mom? Tell me when Mom’s gonna be home” because I was like, “I can’t tell my dad!”

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: Um, and when my mom finally called me back and she said “Chrystal, what’s wrong? Daddy said you’ve been calling all day. What’s going on?” – and I just started crying. And I didn’t even have to tell her. She said, “Are you pregnant?”

Jim: Oh.

Chrystal: And then she ended up handing the phone to my dad. And I could hear the big sigh in his voice, and then he just said, “Okay, well” – because this is typical Tony Evans – “Okay, well, you know, it’ll be okay. We’ll just have to figure out where we go from here.”

Jim: Wow.

Chrystal: He’s always moving forward. Um, so from that point on, it became about making sure that I was okay, making sure – um, “Can you continue school?” What can they do to help me continue in school? And we just kept moving forward. But I think the feeling of disappointment – the problem is – to answer your first question – the problem is, um, for us, as people, when we make decisions that align with someone we think we’re not, that creates an identity crisis. The person I think I am wouldn’t do these things. So if I’m doing these things, then I must not be that person. Well, then who am I? And if we’re not careful, whatever we think the person who took those actions would do, we might start identifying with that person instead.

Jim: It’s really well-said, Chrystal. How do you, at 19 – at that time, how do you process your relationship with the Lord? There’s gonna be many women that have gone through maybe an abortion or something else…

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: …Something devastating that they never anticipated. They didn’t think they were that person.

Chrystal: Mmhmm.

Jim: They didn’t think they’d have to make that kind of decision.

Chrystal: Mmhmm.

Jim: How, as a believer in Christ, do you move through those things, much like King David? I mean, he would not qualify as an elder in the church today.

John: Hm.

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: Yet he was a man after God’s own heart.

Chrystal: Right.

Jim: Being the daughter of a famous pastor – your dad – how do you work through that? How do you get back on track and not allow the enemy to just keep you pinned down?

Chrystal: Well, that’s the reason why I wrote She’s Still There, because in Kingdom Woman, I grazed over the fact that I was a single parent. I didn’t want to spend a whole lot of time on it, didn’t think anybody was that interested in it. And because, um, that became actually one of the most frequently asked questions – so Kingdom Woman – “But wait a minute, you were a single parent. Oh, wait, you were a teenage mom. How did you bridge that gap between who God says you are and what your circumstances may have been telling you – who they were telling you you were?” And so when you say, “You know, how do we get through that, and how do we identify with what the Lord says?” I mean, that is the answer. It’s identifying. And by identify, I really mean rehearsing what He says about you – that if there are voices in your head based on what you see in your life that are telling you you’re something different than what He calls you, then you have to combat that with what He says about you.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: He says we are fearfully and wonderfully made. He says we are loved. We are precious in His sight. There are so many Scriptures in the Bible that speak to how He sees us. And when we don’t feel that way, the problem only comes in when we let our feet be, uh, moved by our feelings and not by the facts of what God says.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: So you literally do have to renew your mind – Romans 12 – with what the word of God says about you until you saturate your mind with what He says, and those saturations drip down to your heart and eventually affect what you do with your feet.

Jim: Well, and I think, you know, it is a process. We said that at the start of the program.

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: Sanctification is a process. I think in parenting, uh, one of the errors we can make is we expect our teenagers to be 40-year-old Christians…

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: …Or 50-year-old Christians.

Chrystal: Right.

Jim: And they haven’t lived life yet. And you can see the mistakes. You can see the errors. I so appreciate your dad’s sigh. I think I would feel the same way – that sigh of, “Oh,” and then, “Okay…”

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: …And then, “Let’s make right choices from here.”

Chrystal: Even more than the sigh, at some point later, he looked me square in the eye. We were sitting face to face, and he just said, “What did we do wrong?”

Jim: Ah, wow.

Chrystal: “What did we do wrong?” Like…

Jim: How did you answer that question?

Chrystal: Uh, I answered it the way I felt, which is the truth. I just said, “Nothing. Um, nothing. And I wish I could offer you some explanation, some connective tissue.” Now I can articulate that Adam and Eve had the perfect parent…

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: …Um, perfect parents, which there are none. But perfect parents, if there is such a thing, don’t necessarily render perfect kids.

Jim: It’s not a formula.

Chrystal: There’s not a formula.

Jim: You know, in that context, you think about it – God gives everybody free will.

Chrystal: That’s right.

Jim: This is the big decision.

Chrystal: We get to choose.

Jim: When you’re a parent, you create life.

Chrystal: That’s right.

Jim: God’s given you the ability to create life. And you do that. And then this child comes, and there’s no stamp, there’s no formula.

Chrystal: That’s right.

Jim: And you can do everything really well and still have a child that, uh, doesn’t choose the direction you would want them to choose.

Chrystal: Listen; I was just telling my boys at the kitchen table – we – we home-school. And so every morning, they have to listen to me do a diatribe of whatever God…

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: …Has been teaching me. And I said to them, “You know, listen; between – don’t take offense to this, boys, but between 15 and 25, those are potentially the dumbest years of your life. Literally, the frontal lobe is not formed until you’re…”

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: “…In your mid-20s. My prayer is that during what could be the dumbest years of your life that you would not make mistakes – because we all make mistakes – that would impact your life in a hugely negative…”

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: “…Way for the rest of your life. But the reality is I have to teach you what I know, pray over you and realize that you get to choose. My prayer is that you make wise choices.”

Jim: You know, before we move on in the story – and we will – um, here at Focus on the Family, we have a really successful program to save babies’ lives called Option Ultrasound. We’ve just hit a milestone of 425,000 babies saved. And we’re hoping, with the help of our listeners and supporters, to save many more. It takes only $60 to help a mom choose life and save her baby from abortion. In your situation, Chrystal, you chose life. Wrap that in a little bit of a bow for the woman listening, that mom listening, who might have a teenage daughter or maybe even that daughter who’s listening herself. Why was it good for you to choose life over the termination of that child?

Chrystal: Well, the Sunday that, um, a lot of the people at my church found out that I was pregnant, there was a friend of mine that came up to me, and she had been a youth worker – a voluntary youth program. She came up to me, and she hugged me. And she says, “I know it feels bad today, but it won’t feel like this forever.”

Jim: Right.

Chrystal: So now that daughter, uh, that I had at 19 is 26. That’s the same daughter who has had two children that has made me a grandmother. And I delight in that daughter, not only as my daughter, but also as my friend. So the thing is we have to look beyond. If you’re in that situation, then that’s a choice you get to make – look beyond today. The way it looks today is not the way it will be forever. But for the person who is not facing the choice but has made that choice, you have to understand that God knew not only who you would be but what you would do before He ever allowed you to live. He knew the outcome of all of your choices, and He still said the blood of Jesus would cover all of your sin – the little ones and the big ones.

Jim: That’s right.

Chrystal: You have to receive that.

John: Well, you’re gonna find more encouragement from Chrystal Evans Hurst in her book She’s Still There: Rescuing the Girl in You. We’ve got copies of that, and we have information about our Option Ultrasound program. You can donate to help us do that – um, details at focusonthefamily.com/broadcast, or call 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY.

Jim: Chrystal, um, moving into the story a little further – so you’ve had this little girl. Um, you eventually get married. Um, there was a time when your husband lost his job. And these are typical things that many of us go through that, you know, it feels like that little girl inside you, the dreamer, when you were 8, 9, 12, um, all of those big dreams become small or, poof, they’re gone. This was another moment in your life where you felt, like, a squashing of the dream. What happened with your husband? And what kind of pressure did you feel at that time?

Chrystal: Well, we – my husband had worked, and he traveled a lot for a living. Um, he actually had a series of health challenges that made it unable for him to continue in what he had been doing. And I remember sitting there looking at the numbers and looking at everything that was in the red in Excel, thinking, “Whoa, how is this gonna work?” But here’s the thing; the lesson that I learned in my 20s, which was that – because the majority of my 20s I was a single mom – which was that God actually does still love me. I learned that gradually. I learned how to identify with His care for me.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: That was what I remembered to grab a hold of in my 30s faced with a different – so I felt the same panic, but I had the experience of God’s love for me and His – His willingness to rescue me from circumstances even that I created for myself. So I was able to feel the panic but then remember the trust that I can have in a God who promises to take care.

Jim: You know, you’ve touched on this, and it’s something I’m learning more and more every time I speak to a woman who has gone through difficulty. The capacity for women to look at their own hearts first, to, in some ways, wear the guilt of their circumstances, it’s an amazing thing. I think we men, we shove it off. Our egos are too big to say, you know, “Yeah, it was the other guy’s fault.” Women own it. They – they dwell on it. They think about it. Speak to the woman who is experiencing that kind of valley right now, and she’s feeling guilt. She’s feeling maybe shame that, you know, she and her husband or their family aren’t doing as well or whatever the circumstances might be. How does she rise above that and feel like a daughter of the king – you know, that these are just temporary, like you mentioned? But how does a woman truly get above the enemy’s taunt? You know, “Are you really special? I don’t think so.”

Chrystal: Yes. Well, here’s the thing. When you think about the enemy’s taunt, one of the things he taunted Eve with was “Did God really say?” So the antidote…

Jim: Yeah, that’s true.

Chrystal: …For the lies of the enemy is, what did God say? So the first thing I always tell a woman is, “Be honest about how you feel,” first of all, ‘cause He already knows. There’s no shame in being scared, hurt, afraid, feeling ashamed, feeling guilty. Be honest. But then you have to go – what if the enemy asked the question, “What does God say?” So be honest. But then search the Scriptures. What does God say about guilt? What does God say about shame? What does He say about care of the ones that He loves? What does He say? Because then when you are able, again, to rehearse what He says in combat with your feelings, that’s where the victory is.

Jim: Yeah. You, uh, had a little bike ride across the Golden Gate Bridge…

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: …That eliminated this for you.

Chrystal: Still have the marks to prove it.

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: Yeah. So what happened?

Chrystal: Well, I’m a little bit of an adventure seeker, and I crossed over the San Francisco Bay Golden Gate Bridge, started heading downhill. I had done it before. Um, and the brakes were a little tight, so when I tapped on them, I went flying over the bicycle…

Jim: Oh, man.

Chrystal: …Hitting my head. But here’s the thing. I – I’m a determined person. I’m an achiever.

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: So I was like…

Jim: You’re firstborn.

Chrystal: “…We’re gonna make it. Put a Band-Aid on it, and let’s keep going.” And my daughter, who was with me, said, “Mom, I don’t think we should.” And I looked down and see the blood on my shirt and realize that my finger is misshapen, and I can’t straighten out my elbow.

Jim: Oh, jeez.

Chrystal: And even when the – when the paramedic arrives, I’m still trying to convince him, “Can you just follow me down the hill? And then when I get down there, then can you take me to the…”

Jim: Yeah, fix my broken bones.

Chrystal: But that’s what we do. So many of us won’t stop to say, “This hurts.”

Jim: Wow.

Chrystal: How can God heal what you won’t admit is painful?

Jim: But, you know, in that context, those physical symptoms are obvious. What about the spiritual and emotional…

Chrystal: Absolutely.

Jim: …Signals?

Chrystal: Well, again, I did not realize until I looked – see, the – the issue is we don’t make the time to look. We are so busy, and we are so – if we feel the pangs of anything, we just push past it.

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: We have to create the space and the margin to look. Another great indicator is that when people who love you – your husband, your kids, your friends, your family – all start asking you, “Are you okay? Is there something wrong? You know, are you okay today?” That’s probably an indicator, too. But making the space to pay attention to your life is the key.

Jim: Yeah. You use an acronym in the book, She’s Still There. Uh, It’s GAIN. Let’s dig into that a little bit. What’s the acronym stands for, and what can women take away from GAIN?

Chrystal: Sure. The G is for gifts. A is abilities. I is for your interests. And N is for your nature or personality. Each one of us, we know we’re unique, we have a fingerprint, and there’s all these unique things physically about us. But we all have unique souls. And when we were born, God gave us gifts, the capacity for abilities, certain passions and personalities that are different. If we want to see what God wants to do with our life, the very first place we can look obviously is His word for His explicit instructions. But the second place is looking in you. What did He give you? Because we each are wired differently. We each are attracted to different things from a passion perspective, and we are naturally gifted at different things. So what did God set you forward to do in terms of just how He wired you? And how are you using what He gave you? And as you look at that, you gain new perspective on your life.

Jim: Yeah. You had a funny story in the book I loved – uh, reaching for – I think it was an almond Hershey chocolate bar.

Chrystal: Yup.

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: Dark chocolate almonds now but…

Jim: But the Lord uses…

Chrystal: …Same thing.

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: He’ll use anything to teach us a lesson, right?

John: I think God uses chocolate a lot…

(LAUGHTER)

John: …Frankly.

Chrystal: He uses chocolate a lot for me.

Jim: But in this case, I can so relate. And I think I’ve finally figured out how to solve this. But you are reaching for this bar in your car. Tell us what happened.

Chrystal: Well, I’m reaching and thinking, “I can reach it.” And in reaching for it, I did reach it, but the hand that was on the steering wheel shifted with the reach…

Jim: Right.

Chrystal: …Which meant I ran off the road. And I was totally okay. But it wasn’t until a few miles later I realized that my car wasn’t okay because the exhaust pipe had been knocked into the median and was blowing smoke and – out of my car. At a gas station a few miles down the road, my car caught on fire because of all the heat…

Jim: Oh, my.

Chrystal: …That was going into the bumper.

Jim: That’s an expensive chocolate bar.

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: Yes, it was. And I just remember thinking…

John: Probably.

Chrystal: …Looking at my car, “Was the chocolate worth it?” Um…

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: But how many times do we wreck something in our life reaching for something that’s just not that important?

Jim: Well, and you related that to drift…

Chrystal: Yes.

Jim: …Which I love.

Chrystal: Yes.

Jim: That idea that you – now, let me just say, the thing that I’ve learned is, just pull over…

Chrystal: Just pull over…

Jim: …And reach over…

Chrystal: …And get the chocolate bar!

Jim: …And get the chocolate!

(LAUGHTER)

Jim: Then keep going. That’s…

Chrystal: Then keep going.

Jim: You know, that’s 50 years of experience there. But, uh…

Chrystal: There you go.

Jim: The point is in life we can drift, we can follow things that pull us away from God’s best. Describe that for us. What were you getting at? That’s my assumption…

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: …Of what you were saying.

Chrystal: That’s absolutely it. We – there are things that we are allowing ourselves to be distracted by. They don’t have to be terrible. But if you’re not paying attention, you’ll look up and be totally – I mean, ‘cause all it takes is a, you know, 1- or 2-degree shift over a long period of time to end up somewhere you never intended to be.

Jim: For a woman, what does that look like? I mean, you’re talking to two husbands…

Chrystal: Sure.

Jim: …Here.

Chrystal: Sure.

Jim: What does that look like for a woman? Where does she experience that drift?

Chrystal: Oh, well, I think – and, again, all drifts don’t have to be bad, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel a little not great. I think every woman who stayed home with her kids looks up when her kids are grown and thinks, “Okay, now all the things that I meant to do – this was a good drift. It was an intentional drive. I wanted to be at home with my kids. But now that the last one has gone to school, now what am I – where were all the things I wanted to do?” And that feeling of, “I lost track of something.” But drifts can also happen obviously because of little decisions that we make over time, like, for instance, um, really wanting to be in a relationship. And then you look up two years later, you’ve put all this time into this relationship, maybe you were dating a guy, and then you don’t even remember what you were doing before you started giving up things in your life to have all this time to be available with him. That can be a drift. It can be a drift because you need to pay the bills, and there’s a passion that you have that you really want to chase. But because you had to take a job to pay the bills – and it was only supposed to be for a year. And 10 years later, you’ve got that job, you’ve got those benefits. Are you actually gonna get back to what you knew you wanted to do? So for a lot of women, um, it can manifest itself in different ways. The question is once you recognize that you’ve taken a drift to not just feel the sadness of how much time has passed and how far you’ve gone but to figure out what steps can you take to get back on track.

Jim: So for that woman, right at the end here, who, you know, may be saying, “That’s me. Chrystal’s describing where I’m at. I’ve given my life to something that now it’s over, and I don’t know who I am.” You know, I’ve mentioned this often, but, um, the greatest number of divorces are occurring with empty-nest couples because typically – not always, but typically – mom looks up and says, “What am I here for? What’s my purpose? What’s my meaning?” And motherhood seemingly is over at that point, and, uh, she doesn’t know what to do. And she doesn’t know her husband any longer. They’ve drifted, to your point. What can she do, not just in that circumstance…

Chrystal: Sure.

Jim: But what can that woman that this is rattling her right now – she’s saying, “Yeah, I used to have a lot of dreams, and now it’s just down to practicality, getting through the day…”

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: “What can I do differently in my routine that makes me feel closer to God, makes me feel passionate about God in my life?”

Chrystal: Yeah.

Jim: “What do I do?”

Chrystal: Well, the first thing is for the woman who is totally lost and has – feels like she has absolutely no clue, the first thing is there’s always usually one thing. There’s one thing. And it may seem tiny and small, but there’s one. So let’s say I don’t know what to do. If you go to church, there are many ministries probably at your church, and you can pick something that you feel like you have some acclimation towards. That’s one thing. As my dad likes to say, “God loves to hit a moving target.”

(LAUGHTER)

Chrystal: And many times…

Jim: That’s good.

Chrystal: …We don’t get to the next thing because we won’t do the one thing that’s in front of us. Um, but just to refer back to what we said about gaining a new perspective, what passions did God give you that you let lay dormant? Well, get back to some of those. You may think it’s too late, but if it’s still in you, it’s not. I think if we will just honor with what we know, even if it’s just one step, then God continues to light our path with what he wants to teach us after.

Closing:

Jim: Chrystal, I so appreciate the insight and wisdom that you have brought to particularly women today, uh, to men, too, for that matter. Our lost dreams and things we wanted to pursue are still important. And when that day-to-day grind catches up with us, we tend to get discouraged. But this book, She’s Still There, is inspiring. And we’ll get the reader dreaming once more, together.

Again, I come back to how you set your dreams aside, chose life for your baby, and persevered as a single mom. That takes a lot of courage and determination. But it was the right thing to do. And I want to encourage you, our listener, to walk with us over the next few weeks as we lift up the value, the sanctity of human life. We have a whole campaign to better inform and equip you to take a stand for pre-born children, which will culminate with a big event in Times Square on May 4th. We’re calling it “Alive from New York.” And we’re planning to show a live, 4D ultrasound up there on the big screen because we want people to see clearly, the image of a 3rd trimester baby so they can see exactly what’s happening in a mother’s womb.

John: Yeah you can learn more about our Times Square event on May 4th and joining us – it’ll be fantastic, invite your friends and family, and join us in taking a stand for life.

Jim: Yes, and you can support our efforts here at Focus on the Family. And as I mentioned earlier, it takes only $60 to save a baby through our Option Ultrasound program. $60! Imagine saving a life for the cost of one meal out with your family. I’d say it’s worth it. And when you give today, your donation will be doubled thanks to some generous friends of this ministry who really believe in this effort. So your $60 will actually be $120 saving two babies! And as our way of saying thank you for standing for life and helping us save these babies, we’ll send you a copy of Chrystal’s book, She’s Still There.

John: Donate and get your copy of She’s Still There and learn more about the “Alive from New York” event on May 4th when you go online at focusonthefamily.com/broadcast. Or call us. Our number is 800-232-6459. 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY.

Jim: Hey, Chrystal, before we say goodbye, I also want to highlight your 90-day challenge. Why is 90 days significant? And can we really turn the ship in 90 days in terms of our perspective and our attitude?

Chrystal: You might be able to turn the ship in 90 days, but what you can definitely do is move the needle. And so what I say is if you can pick three things that are low-hanging fruit that would move you forward – they don’t have to be the end of the story, just move you forward – what you do is you build momentum, and you start to change the narrative about your own life – that you are a person who can move forward. And then you just keep moving in 90-day increments. To set a goal for a year, that’s long. To set a goal for a month, that’s a little short. Ninety days actually give you time to do it…

Jim: Yeah.

Chrystal: …And time for you to convince yourself that you’re the person who can actually make changes in your life.

Jim: Yeah, you can make – get a quick win…

Chrystal: That’s right.

Jim: …And keep winning.

Chrystal: That’s right.

Jim: I love it. Thanks so much for being with us.

Chrystal: Thank you for having me.

John: Well, join us next time as Deb DeArmond discusses the delicate balance of in-law relationships.

Teaser:

Deb DeArmond: And I tell mothers-in-law, “If you make them choose, and you’ve raised them right, he’ll choose his wife, and he’ll break your heart.”

Jim: Right.

Deb: “But if he chooses you, it’ll break God’s heart and perhaps his marriage.”

End of Teaser

Today's Guests

She's Still There

Receive the book She's Still There for your donation of any amount! And when you give today, your donation will be doubled to support the Gift of Family.

Recent Episodes

Focus on the Family Broadcast logo

Abortion Pill Reversal

Rebekah Buell Hagan shares her powerful story of pursuing a chemically-induced abortion and then experiencing a change of heart which led to saving her baby’s life. Dr. Bill Lile, a pro-life OB/GYN, explains how the abortion pill works, how its effects may be reversed, and how this option is being provided to women and teen girls who have second thoughts about having an abortion.

Focus on the Family Broadcast logo

Living For an Audience of One (Part 2 of 2)

Karen Ehman’s journey as a recovering people-pleaser began when she realized she was seeking others’ approval more than God’s. In this conversation, Karen shares practical guidance on healthy boundaries and encourages you to serve God intentionally in the areas he’s called you to serve.

Focus on the Family Broadcast logo

Living For an Audience of One (Part 1 of 2)

Karen Ehman’s journey as a recovering people-pleaser began when she realized she was seeking others’ approval more than God’s. In this conversation, Karen shares practical guidance on healthy boundaries and encourages you to serve God intentionally in the areas he’s called you to serve.

You May Also Like

Focus on the Family Broadcast logo

A Legacy of Music and Trusting the Lord

Popular Christian vocalist Larnelle Harris reflects on his five-decade music career, sharing the valuable life lessons he’s learned about putting his family first, allowing God to redeem a troubled past, recognizing those who’ve sacrificed for his benefit, and faithfully adhering to biblical principles amidst all the opportunities that have come his way.

Focus on the Family Broadcast logo

Accepting Your Imperfect Life

Amy Carroll shares how her perfectionism led to her being discontent in her marriage for over a decade, how she learned to find value in who Christ is, not in what she does, and practical ways everyone can accept the messiness of marriage and of life.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 2

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Cherishing Your Spouse Every Day

Do you love your spouse, or do you truly cherish them? Gary Thomas encourages couples to make a daily effort to go beyond the ‘duty’ of love, and combat the natural inclination to drift apart, by choosing to see the best in their spouse.

Mr. Gary Thomas

Gary Thomas is an international speaker and best-selling, award-winning author whose books include Married SexSacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting. He has also written numerous articles for several prominent national magazines. Gary and his wife, Lisa, reside in Texas and have three children. You can learn more about Gary by visiting his website, www.garythomas.com.

cherish front cover

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.” Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book–Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 2: Heroes Providing Hope

Discover the amazing work our PRC’s Directors, Nurses, and Volunteers are making in their communities! You’ll see firsthand testimonies of a PRC in action, and that there are other options outside of abortions! You’ll also discover how your family can support your local PRC!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video about see life episode 4 normal version

Newest Release - Episode 4: Sometimes the Choice is Hard

Hear real life stories of parents who have made the decision to choose life even though the circumstances were overwhelming. You’ll see why “ALL” life is precious to God and why choosing life is always the right decision!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 3: The Power of a Picture

Have you ever wondered what a baby looked like in the womb? With today’s technology, Moms and Dads can see the baby’s heartbeat, facial expressions, and movements! You’ll find out why more women choose life once they hear their baby’s heartbeat and realize it’s a real living human!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video about see life episode 5 normal version

Newest Release - Episode 5: It’s Going to be Amazing!

After a couple has chosen life, hear the heartwarming stories of children that culture would have cast aside, yet are making tremendous impacts in their communities. Whether the diagnosis was adverse or the circumstances were difficult, these stories will inspire you to come along side of families who have chosen life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 6: Families Helping Families!

So, after all you’ve seen through the SeeLife ‘21 Episodic journey; what can you do now? We’ll share how you can partner with some amazing organizations that are making significant impacts in the pro-life movement! You want to Celebrate Life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 2

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Effective Habits to Embrace in Parenting

To be an effective parent, you must be a leader in your child’s life, guiding with a gentle hand and setting a solid example. Dr. Randy Schroeder provides the insight you need to be a leader-parent. As he explores the foundational Rs—relationship, routines, responsibilities, and rules—you’ll better understand the role you play in your child’s life. You’ll learn great phrases to employ such as “Either/Or/You Decide” and “When You/Then You”. While there is no perfect parent, this nuts-and-bolts material will equip you to lead your child in a loving, confident manner.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder has spent more than four decades writing, counseling, speaking, and teaching. For nearly 25 years, he was Vice President of Student Personnel Services, Dean of Students, and a professor of pastoral counseling at Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne, Ind. He’s also led a successful counseling practice helping individuals, couples, and families to thrive in their lives and relationships.

Cover image of Dr. Randall Schroeder's book "Simple Habits for Effective Parenting"

Simple Habits for Effective Parenting

Effective parenting is now within your grasp! With this inspiring how-to comprehensive book, achieve extraordinary results in raising a child to be self-assured, self-reliant, and responsible! You will be able to successfully lead and lovingly encourage your child toward a Godly life!

The Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage

God designed marriage to reflect His love to the world; and because of this, the enemy wants to destroy God’s beautiful design. Based on his book, Defending Your Marriage, Dr. Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff share about the reality of spiritual warfare against marriages, and how to combat the enemy’s lies with the truth of God. Couples will be encouraged that they’re not alone in the fight for a godly marriage and better equipped to be a shining example for the world around them.

Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff Cropped

Dr. Tim and Mrs. Noreen Muehlhoff

Dr. Tim Muehlhoff is a professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication, apologetics, gender, and conflict resolution.  Tim and his wife, Noreen, are both on staff with Biola’s Center for Marriage and Relationships  where he is a co-host of The Art of Relationship podcast. 

Defending Your Marriage

Is your marriage under attack? Sometimes it can feel like the world is trying to tear your marriage apart. Internal conflicts or external pressures might make you wonder if something sinister is going on. How can you tell if you’re facing spiritual opposition? And what can you do about it? Tim Muehlhoff provides a straightforward resource for protecting your marriage from the threats of the evil one. He looks at what Scripture says about spiritual warfare and how our everyday struggles have deeper spiritual realities. And he provides practical steps for guarding our marriages with the whole armor of God.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 1

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 2

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 2

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage - Part 2

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 1

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

How a Former Abortion Doctor Became Pro-Life

As an abortion doctor at Planned Parenthood, Dr. Patti Giebink believed she was helping women. Later, she began reading scripture and God gradually changed her heart on the abortion issue. Patti tells the story of her long journey from abortion doctor to pro-life and encourages listeners to share the message of life with compassion.

Headshot image of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Patti Giebink

Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

Cover image of the book "Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life"

Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life

Unexpected Choice is told from the perspective of a doctor who actually performed abortions through Planned Parenthood. The book chronicles her journey from being a pro-choice physician to someone speaking on behalf of the pro-life movement.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Thank you for committing to pray for the pre-born!

Sign up below for your free seven-day prayer guide. This daily guide will help give direction to your prayers for the pro-life movement. We will be praying with you!