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How to Help Your Children Find Purpose

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Dad has his arm affectionately wrapped around his smiling, young son’s head as they sit together outside
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How will you lead your children to following Jesus before they enter adulthood?

As the council argued over who would destroy the One Ring in the movie The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, hobbit Frodo Baggins stood up. Trying to be heard over the “I will take it. I will take the ring to Mordor. Though I do not know the way.”

Like Frodo, embedded in the DNA of all children is a deep sense that they are on this planet to do something impactful, to make a difference, to build a better world. But they often don’t know what it is or how to do it. They don’t know the way.

While a child’s body will mature with or without the input of others, character is forged in a child when adults, especially dads, instill a vision for how to be a good man or woman — a person who can be counted on, does the right thing, serves others, seeks the greater good, uses his or her unique gifts and talents for godly purposes and takes up his or her cross and follows Jesus.

Here are some ideas for how dads can give their sons and daughters these ideals to strive toward:

Give a blessing

Before Jesus began His ministry, His Father armed Him with His blessing during His baptism. God said, “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased” (Mark 1:11).

Children need to know their father is proud of them and that he loves them. If they don’t, they will live with a gaping father wound and will often try to fill it in the wrong way. My father’s father was an alcoholic. He abandoned my dad’s family. As a result, my dad lived his life trying to earn his dad’s love.

The good news is that Dad didn’t pass along that wound to his children. Instead, through his words, involvement, hugs and affirmation, he gave us the blessings we craved. This empowered us to be who God created us to be.

As a parent, continually look for opportunities to bless your children. Look them in the eyes, put your hand on their shoulders, and say, “I’m proud of you. I love you and will always love you.”

Model adulthood well

By modeling the way you interact with your spouse and friends at work, you train your children to be confident individuals. But there are specific moments in a child’s life that lend themselves to more intensive training opportunities.

  • Turning 13, for example, is a great time to help your children begin to process what it means to be a man or woman, inviting each to answer the question, “What kind of man (woman) do you want to be and what will you do now to be that kind of man (woman)?”
  • Turning 16 and getting a driver’s license is an opportune time to talk about responsibility.
  • Going on a date is a time to chat about how individuals should treat members of the opposite sex.

Invite them to follow you as you follow Jesus

This invitation may seem daunting, as so many of us feel unqualified to lead our children in the adventure of faith. But here’s the good news: Leading your children on the faith journey isn’t about being perfect or even qualified. It’s about living in the promise that you’re God’s beloved child, and He is fully pleased with you.

The support of your faith community, the influence of those who love your child, your prayer and worship life, energized by God’s Spirit, will empower you to point and lead your children into their God-given purpose: to follow Jesus into adulthood.

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Your Teen Needs You Most of All

No parent of teens is perfect and even the best can learn how to better connect with their son or daughter. Get practical action steps to better connect with your teenager in 8 Essential Tips for Parenting Your Teen in this FREE video series!

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
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Understand How to Respect and Love your Son Well

Why doesn’t my son listen to me? Have you ever asked that question? The truth is, how you see your son and talk to him has a significant effect on how he thinks and acts. That’s why we want to help you. In fact, we’ve created a free five-part video series called “Recognizing Your Son’s Need for Respect” that will help you understand how showing respect, rather than shaming and badgering, will serve to motivate and guide your son.

Reconnected: The Digital Experience

Is the love there, but not the spark? Reawaken fun in your marriage and move from roommates to soulmates again with the help of this 7-part online video experience. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually as husband and wife using techniques such as dreaming together and establishing deep, heartfelt communication. The Digital Experience includes 7 teaching videos, an online study guide and access to additional tools and resources to help spouses reconnect.
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