An Interview with Charles Berry
Foster parenting experiences are like snowflakes. Each is unique, beautiful, and intentionally designed by God.
Charles Berry and his family had avidly supported their local foster ministry for 12 years. However, through the prompting of the Holy Spirit, Charles and his wife began to feel called to foster and adoptive parenthood. During the COVID-19 pandemic, the Berrys completed their certification to become foster parents. Now, Charles shares about his experience as a foster parent, highlighting his reliance on God’s presence in every step of the process.
Key Takeaways:
- Charles Berry’s story of becoming a foster parent.
- Listen to God’s voice about how you can become a foster parent or supporter of foster care.
- God will stretch those He calls to become foster parents.
- Everyone can help support children in foster care.
Divine Peace in Becoming a Foster Parent
Eighteen months after completing the rigorous process of becoming certified foster parents, the Berry family received a call from their foster care agency. A four-month-old boy needed a home immediately. There was no timeline beyond that. It was an emergency extraction.
“Can you take him?” asked the agent.
Charles Berry turned to his wife. They’d received calls to take in children before, but they had never felt God’s divine peace to bring a child in foster care into their home.
This time was different.
“It was one of those unexplainable moments where we just knew that the peace of God was on it,” says Charles.
Unsure what to expect, Charles and his wife agreed to take the baby boy.
“We’ll be there in two hours,” said the agent.
With only two hours to prepare, the Berrys scrambled to ready their home for the newest member of their family. And when the little boy arrived, all he had was a small diaper bag and his car seat.
“What do we do now?” thought Charles.
Although he had a biological 6-year-old daughter, Charles felt daunted by the task of raising another baby. The prospect of more diaper changes, late nights, and potty training felt overwhelming.
Charles explains that the start of his foster parent experience “was certainly a ‘stretch’ assignment for us, but I trusted that the Lord would be glorified through the process.
Heart-to-Heart
Charles was able to see God’s provision for him and his new child through the support of fellow believers. When the young boy first came to the Berry home, Charles found it difficult to connect with him. Hoping to form a bond with the child, Charles began to seek advice from other foster and adoption-minded Christians. One of these people was Wait No More’s Dr. Sharen Ford. She counseled him that an effective way to bond with a baby in foster care is through skin-to-skin contact (or “kangaroo care”)
Charles let Sharen’s advice ruminate for a few days, but when another believer counseled him with the same instruction, Charles knew he had to try.
That afternoon, Charles went home and placed his four-month-old next to his heart.
Because of Charles’ powerful experience with God’s presence in his transracial foster placement, he asserts, “Every time people see a transracial foster placement or adoption, I think they see the heart of God.”
“Our hearts were knit together in that moment,” says Charles. “He started to look at me differently, and I started to look at him differently.”
The Heart of God in Foster Parenting
Charles’ understanding of God’s heart for adoption expanded during an experience he had at church. The baby boy had blown out his diaper, so Charles rushed to the restroom to change his child’s clothes. He found a spare shirt and a pair of pants in the diaper bag, but he was missing an extra pair of socks. So, Charles strapped his baby onto his chest, letting the baby’s bare feet hang down.
As Charles walked through the church hallway, he noticed something: He felt that some people were giving him and his baby second glances.
Maybe, thought Charles, it’s because my baby’s white skin is different than my dark skin.
But before Charles could dwell on the second glances any longer, he heard God speaking to him: Don’t worry about their response. You keep loving this little boy because this is the assignment that I have for you.
In that moment, Charles learned at a deeper level that “the Spirit of adoption transcends color, race, creed, age and all the boxes we try to place people in.”
Because of Charles’ powerful experience with God’s presence in his transracial foster
placement, he asserts, “Every time people see a transracial foster placement or adoption, I think they see the heart of God.”
Planting Seeds
Christ continued to work in the hearts of Charles and his little boy. Around two years of age, Charles’ child received a suitcase bundle from Wait No More.
“For me, Daddy?” he asked with wide eyes.
With great excitement, the two-year-old opened his suitcase and found a teddy bear and an Adventures in Odyssey Bible. The compelling pictures in the Bible got him excited to hear his parents read the biblical stories.
Charles recalls the moment when he recognized the significance of the suitcase bundle gift. While the little boy was at daycare, he started talking about God to a daycare employee. Reflecting on this sweet moment, Charles realizes that the suitcase gift planted the seed in his child’s life to understand and share about God.
As Charles continues to raise his little boy, he repeatedly sees examples of God’s presence in their journey.
Three Takeaways from Charles’ Story
The Berrys’ experience with foster parenthood provides a positive model for other believers who are interested in serving Christ through foster ministry. These are three key takeaways from their story:
1. Listen for God’s Voice
Charles’ story highlights the importance of listening to the voice of God. In every step of the process—from deciding to become foster parents to navigating the difficulties—Charles and his wife sought guidance from the Lord. They waited to experience God’s peace before they accepted a foster placement. And Charles heard God’s voice by listening to the counsel of fellow believers. Hearing God is essential to serving Him.
2. Expect to be Stretched in Foster Parenting
A quick perusal through the Scriptures reveals that Kingdom work is rarely done within someone’s comfort zone. And the Berrys’ story reveals the same about foster ministry. Charles felt stretched when faced with raising another infant. He felt out of his comfort zone when he realized that people might stare because his child looked different than him. Still, Charles gained a deeper understanding of God’s heart because he was stretched beyond his comfort zone.
3. Everyone can help
For those who aren’t called to open their homes to kids in foster care, it might be difficult to see what can be gleaned from Charles’ experience as a foster parent. But something important to remember is that Charles and his wife had faithfully supported a foster ministry for 12 years before they chose to become foster parents. In fact, even after they’d stepped into foster parenthood, they still relied on fellow believers and ministries for assistance. Everyone’s support is critical in helping foster families thrive.
Aligning With God’s Heart in Foster Parenting
Charles believes that “foster parents experience the heart of God when they step into it with pure intentions.” Despite the challenges he encountered, Charles demonstrates that his reliance on Christ drew him closer to his son and his Heavenly Father.
Not everyone will have a place in their home for a child in foster care. However, by supporting foster parents and foster ministries, everyone can align their hearts with the heart of God.
In Summary
Charles Berry’s experience with becoming a foster parent taught him how to see the heart of God. Despite the challenges to him and his family, he learned to listen to God’s voice for direction. Providing foster care stretched him and his family, and they grew in their relationship with Christ and with each other as a result. Charles encourages everyone to get involved in foster care. Even if you can’t take a child in foster care into your home, there are a multitude of ways that you can get involved and support foster families, children, and the foster care system.
