Focus on the Family Broadcast

Finding Your Lifelong Love

Finding Your Lifelong Love

Pastor Dan Chun and Boundless' Lisa Anderson discuss some of the most important qualities singles should look for in a potential spouse.

Opening:

Teaser:

John Fuller: Dan Chun is our guest today on “Focus on the Family” with Jim Daly and Dan, what’s one characteristic that a single person should look for in a potential spouse?

Dan Chun: Wow, one characteristic! I think the biggest one is character, is will this person say what he means or she means? And do they really follow through? Do they have honesty and integrity? Character’s a big one.

End of Teaser

John: Well, character is a big one and you’ll hear more from Dan today. And this is gonna be a program for you if you’re single and hoping to marry. Our host, as I said, is Focus president and author, Jim Daly. I’m John Fuller and Jim, as we talk a lot about marriage and parenting on these programs, we also like to come alongside singles and that’s exactly what we’re doin’ today.

Jim Daly: We are, John, and it’s not just for singles. I’m thinking of the moms and dads, too, that have adult children that are tryin’ to decide what’s goin’ on in their life. They’re maybe 20-, 30-something and they haven’t found the person that they want to marry. And this show will be for you, too, to have that dialogue as a concerned and you know, good parent, to say what’s happening. So, we’re speaking to all the audiences today.

Also I recognize, you know what? We’ve got a pretty good, 20-something, 30-something listenership, John and we want to say right from the git-go, the pressure to marry, don’t feel that today. If people feel called to singleness, that’s a blessing and the Bible talks very specifically about that.

John: Uh-hm.

Jim: There are a lot of people, though, who are single today that want to get married and want to do it in a biblical way. And this will be specifically for you and also joining us today will be our very own Lisa Anderson, who heads up Boundless, which is our ministry to singles and it’s gonna be great to have both of their perspectives.

John: Well, I’d agree and Dan has been a pastor for over 35 years, along the way helping singles meet and marry. And he wrote the book, How to Pick a Spouse: A Proven, Practical Guide to Finding a Lifelong Partner.

Body:

Jim: Let me say, welcome to both of you.

Dan: Well—

Lisa Anderson: Thank you.

Dan: –it’s great to be here.

Jim: Hey, Lisa, let me give you the opportunity for that plug. What’s Boundless all about?

Lisa: (Chuckling) Well, we exist to help single young adults grow up, own their faith, date with purpose and prepare for marriage and family. But really functionally, we like to think of ourselves as a community for singles, where they can come and share, not only their joys, but their frustrations with where they are along the road, whether that’s in relationships or grappling with their faith or their career, just trying to navigate adulthood.

Jim: How does a person get in touch with Boundless?

Lisa:www.boundless.org primarily is where it’s all at. I mean, we publish articles. We have an advice column each week. We have a group blog and we have a weekly show. And so (Laughter) it’s fun. I mean, we get great dialogue going between singles and they feel like they’ve found a place where they can be real and where they can be supported.

Jim: Dan, you’ve written a book with the perfect title. It’s called How to Pick a Spouse. What were you trying to do there? What were you trying to accomplish for those who are single, but want to do it in a godly way, that they want to find a mate in a way that honors God?

Dan: Well, for 6 ½ years—

Jim: Okay.

Dan: –and so, Menlo Park Presbyterian Church, asked me to—

Jim: Big church.

Dan: –start a singles’ department, which is a really crazy job description. Nobody grows up saying, “I think I want to be a pastor just to singles.” And so, for the never married, widowed and divorced, all ages and within three years, we had several thousand coming through our program. It was just the thing and Silicon Valley was booming, too.

But I think singles are looking for a safe place where they can find friends, maybe possible dates, maybe a mate, but some community. And so, being with them for 6 ½ years, I realized the great need for them to choose the right spouse, if they were to choose to get married.

And we discovered 20 years later that when I researched it, I wondered, “Gee, I wonder how many of them who got married, how many of them got divorced after I taught them all these different principles.” And 20-plus years later to my stunning amazement, only 25 got divorced out of 261.

Jim: So, it’s about a 9 percent—

Dan: Yeah.

Jim: –rate.

Dan: Yeah, about 9 percent–

Jim: That’s terrific.

Dan: –which is way below the national average, which is around 25 to 30 percent depending on your demographic. It could go as high as 40.

Jim: Well, we’re gonna get into some of those things that you taught during that time and other things that you’ve learned along the way, but let me start kinda at the basics. You know, we hear from a lot of singles every day who don’t want to be single. And Lisa, you’re certainly hearing that with Boundless. Of course, again, some are comfortable there and they’re quite content. But what’s the balance between trusting in God to provide you a spouse and going (Chuckling) you know, out of your way to make it happen? That’s probably one of the most common questions we get here at Focus on the Family. How far should I go in making it happen?

Dan: Well, I don’t know if we can make it happen. I think the bottom line is we have to trust God. We also have to know that when we look at the Bible, the single life is actually the life that the Apostle Paul promotes the most. And it’s kind of like, well, okay, if you can’t be single, then yeah, get married. So, we think singleness is like the second tier, but actually it was the first, because you could be totally devoted to God and not have the anxieties of the world, as Corinthians says.

Jim: So, let me push you a bit on that, because as the marriage rate has been postponed to a later age, in other words, if it used to be 21, it’s now 29 or 30, is that a good thing, you’re saying?

Dan: I would say, that’s a good thing. I think the statistics actually say the longer you date, the longer you wait, is a very good thing and you’re less likely to get divorced if you have longer courtships.

Jim: Let me push on that a bit, because a lot of theologians now and church leadership, they’re promoting marrying younger, because of the, you know, the infatuation hormones, it’s hard to control that through your encouraging people to wait and at the same time, they’re still, you know, they’re in their production years. How do they fight off those temptations that they need to fight off?

Dan: Well, No. 1 and I think whatever age you’re in, you’re gonna be fighting temptations and whether it’s with money or power or sex. And I … it is in our younger years and even in the older years, when we get into romance, we can get into what I call the “weird zone.” We can get infatuated and so, you just have to deal with that in a mature way. And what is worse, actually, when you think about it? Do you want to make, you know, the wrong choice in marriage and suffer through that for decades? Or do you want to wait? And I think it’s worth waiting to make sure you’re picking the right spouse.

If you think about it, a million people, according to the census, there are a million divorces a year. That’s 2 million people involved in divorce. And if they have two kids, that 4 million involved. If there are in-laws, that’s 8 million. If there’s any disease that hit 8 million people for a year in America, we would call that a pandemic. And so, we’ve gotta slow down and figure this out.

Why go through a divorce when it’s so painful and can cause such havoc in one’s life? It’s worse to be lonely in a marriage than lonely as a single person, because when you’re lonely in a marriage, it’s kind of the night of the living dead. You’re constantly reminded by your spouse, you don’t count. You’re not with it enough. I find somebody else more attractive. And so, going through a divorce and having gone through a divorce before I became a pastor, is not something I would wish on an enemy.

Jim: We’ll get back to that. Lisa, what do you think?

Lisa: Yeah, you know, I mean, I agree with Dan in the sense that, you know, I’ve heard from many married people and many people in our Boundless sphere that were married that say that very same thing. I wish that I could look up dating in the concordance of my Bible and just figure out what this is about, but—

Jim: You haven’t seen it?

Lisa: –it’s not there. Well, I mean, I probably need a different version, you know, and see if it’s there. But you know, it’s just not explicitly spelled out for us, which can be frustrating for singles, ’cause we just want to be told, what’s the right way?

And I would say I probably disagree with Dan just a little bit in the sense of, you know, I did wait. I did protract my singleness. I did utilize my 20s to “find myself.” (Laughing) I’m not actually sure where I arrived by the end of them. But (Laughter) you have to be careful as a single not to enter a state of paralysis by virtue of trying to evaluate and find the right mate.

Obviously, and certainly this is what Dan unpacks in his book, there are things that have to be on the table and characteristics that have to be present. But at the same time, I think we can overthink it, too, and get into this idea of, okay, am I sure I’m ready? Am I sure this is the right person? Am I sure they have this quality? Am how can I have this iron-clad conviction that they will never leave me?

Well, you can’t (Chuckling), you know. Eventually, you do have to put this into God’s hands and say, “I have done the best I can to entrust this decision to the Lord and to make a wise choice.” And then from there, you know, you go for it. And I think that a lot of younger singles, if they are mature enough and can get to marriage, have a good chance because of the opportunity to grow and mature together in their marriage, to make that transition a little more smoothly. I jokingly tell people now, you know, [if] I get married now, it will be probably a 12-step program for me to unshackle myself from my own selfishness, my own plans, my own ideas. Everything that I do, you know, authorship and ownership of my finances, my time whatever, I’m sure it will unveil many horrible things about me. And so, I’m just gonna be prepared for that, I guess.

Jim: Well, which I think is one of the great benefits of marriage. I think we—

Lisa: Yeah.

Jim: –I’ve said this before—

Lisa: Absolutely.

Jim: –what one of the reasons I think we come together is two individuals to become one is to learn selflessness. And It’s hard for human beings. Dan, I don’t want to kind of skirt by what you ended with, because I think it’s quite a paradox for you to be doing single ministry and helping singles to find their mate and train them and teach them and we’re gonna get to some of those helpful hints in a minute, but you mentioned just briefly there about your divorce. That had to be such a paradox for you. Tell us what happened and what God taught you in all of that.

Dan: Well, clearly it was one of the worst seasons in my whole life. And here it was, I went up to seminary and you are normally commissioned by your local church. They lay hands on you. They send you off to seminary. And two weeks after we got there, my wife said, “You know, I don’t love you. I never did.”

And it was a stunning shock and we went through some weeks of emergency therapy and then she left for her hometown on the mainland and I stayed there. And a year later we were divorced and it was clearly a very sad, sad time for me and I think for us, we got married very young. She was 20; I was 21 and there are some cultural differences that I didn’t foresee. And so, it was a sad time.

But you know, out of that, God used it tremendously and I was able to become a singles pastor later and use that pain and be now I would say, a “wounded healer.” And I think what gave accessibility to me and authenticity to what I was saying to the singles.

By God’s grace, I then five years later, found my wife, Pam and this year will be our 32nd year of marriage. And so, I do know how to pick a good spouse in the end.

Jim: That had to be a very dark period in your life to go through that, but the Lord, like Romans 8:28 says, He uses all these things for His purposes. If you went back, what were some things that you would’ve done differently at 20, 21, that would’ve helped you perhaps chose more wisely?

Dan: Well, I think No. 1 is you know, one of my principles is it’s good to [do] summer and winter together, meaning you should take a lap around the track of a full year at least. And we had a very short courtship and I don’t think that is wise for most people. And statistically, it shows in research, the longer your courtship, the better. You just discover more about each other and not that you throw your hands up, but just know what you’re getting into.

Jim: Well, it’s true. The research shows that premarital counseling is significant when it comes to stability in marriage. But the stats show very clearly that if they receive 10 hours of premarital counseling, the incidence of divorce goes way down. And that’s a good thing for all of us to invest in.

John: And this is “Focus on the Family” with Jim Daly. Our guests are Dan Chun and Lisa Anderson. And we’ll remind you to connect with us online to get helpful advice on this subject from Dan’s book, How to Pick a Spouse and also from our Boundless outreach. We’ll post some articles and you can learn about the Boundless Pursuit conference here in Colorado Springs in July, when you stop by www.focusonthefamily.com/radio.

Jim: Dan and Lisa, let me just throw this out to both of you, because I think, you know, we want to be rooted in Scripture. I think everything that we should do here at Focus on the Family needs to be rooted in Scripture. So, when you look at courtship and dating, it is a rather new phenomena. It’s not something that they did in the old country. I mean, usually families were involved and a lot of marriages were arranged marriages, which frankly when you look at the data, many of those succeed at a higher rate than infatuation marriage, if you want to call it that. Talk about that change, that new, relatively new phenomena of dating. What’s right about it? What’s wrong about it? And how do we as Christians, how should we approach this, both for parents and for the 20-, 30-something who is looking for a mate?

Dan: Well, that’s absolutely right. Dating is pretty new historically, and that was about the Victorian Age at the turn of the 20th century. But yet, what happened back then is, the community helped chaperone and the community helped pick the date.

And today through the church we have a community, and it is very important to allow the community to have a part in helping you decide is that the right person to mate? And well, one of my principals says, it takes a village to choose a spouse. (Laughter) And we are just not in the habit of giving permission to our friends to speak into our lives, to say that person is good or not.

Jim: Why? Why are we so individualistic around this area of courtship?

Dan: Well, a lot of it has to do with the infatuation stage, in that we are so caught up with the person, so what happens is, we say, you know, the girl says, “What do you think of Ryan? Isn’t he a great guy? He seems so spiritual and he loves to pray and he knows what I’m thinking before I even say it. What do you think?” And at that point, all the friends are like backed into a corner. What can they say?

Jim: Right.

Dan: Because what if you do marry this guy and we don’t want to burn a bridge with him and we want him to be part of our friendship. And so, they say something like, “Oh, he’s nice. Yeah, I like him.” (Laughter) And under their breath they’re saying, “If you don’t mind a sociopath” (Laughter), you know.

And there’s so many stories of people who have broken up five years, even 10 years. Last year a friend broke up after 10 years and they turned to their friends and their friends say, “Yeah, we never thought he was good for you.” And it’s 100 percent and it’s like, what a waste of 10 years.

Jim: But it is tenuous, because you know, for the friends, you might be breaking up something that God is wanting to bring together. It’s a delicate balance. Lisa, have you gone through that?

Lisa: Oh, yeah (Laughter), several times. I’ve been on both sides of this conversation. So, I consider myself a very rational person, but I have noticed in dating people that when I start dating, I go nuts. I basically lose my senses and my friends have, as well. Because immediately, we get so into a person and just backing up a second to what Dan was saying, part of the thing is, a few generations ago, you ended up marrying the people that you grew up with. You had very limited—

Jim: The village.

Lisa: –social circles. You know, it was that person the next farm over. You know, so you knew what they were about. You knew what they came from. You knew what they struggled with. Now we’re meeting people online. We’re doing speed dating, where getting random, you know, set-ups with people. So, you have to do a lot of reconnaissance about this person (Laughter), okay. I mean, this is like, you can take on some full-time, like private investigators. I have searched people via their online handles and found crazy stuff about people that I’ve dated. So, it’s sketchy. And so, you get crazy, and immediately, once you decide you’re into someone, the excuses start and I’ve been here.

I met a guy online. He came out to Colorado, stayed with one of our pastors. I thought he was so great. The whole time he was here, he didn’t pay for a single thing. I paid for everything we did and it was all awkward and I was like, well. And my friends, I remember them staging an intervention with me after he left. And it was like, what was that about? And I immediately started in, look, I’m sure he was nervous. I’m sure he didn’t want to come across like chauvinistic. I’m sure that if I were to go out there, he would pay for everything. I’m sure there’s an explanation. And they’re like, or maybe he’s a jerk. And (Laughter) you just don’t know—

Jim: And that’s the—

Lisa: –what you’re talking about.

Jim: –explanation.

Lisa: Yeah and I just couldn’t believe it, ’cause he was so funny and he was smart and he went to church and he said he loved Jesus and you know, but where was the proof of that? And the proof was, he treated me terribly. As I examined his friends, he had friends with a bunch of frat boy losers. He didn’t have good guys in his life. So, stepping back from it and the thing imploded, praise God, I just see that it was a bad situation and I needed the objectivity of my friends to speak into that.

Jim: Dan, it’s probably touching on a number of the elements that you talk about in the book. Tell me if you’re—

Dan: It does—

Jim: –counseling Lisa.

Dan: –I mean, it’s like you know, what Lisa says, it’s like picking all these different things of all these different chapters. And you know, first of all, I want to say that friends, if they’re your friends, they really want the best for you. I can’t imagine a friend lying to us and saying, like if this guy was really bad, “Oh, he’s good; why don’t you marry him?”

Lisa: Uh-hm.

Dan: I mean, they would really say to Lisa, as they did in this so-called intervention, this guy is bad news. And in the book I talk about having an “anti-virus software.” It goes, Beep, beep, beep, beep.” And your friends can be that and the first one of anti-virus software is stinginess. And so, the guy’s not paying for any meal, that’s a big, you know—

Jim: Red flag.

Dan: —yeah, it’s like a Norton Utility software goin’ off and saying, something’s wrong.

Jim: You talk about the three M‘s. What are the three M‘s in your book?

Dan: Well, I think the three or three of the most important decisions you make in life is, No. 1, you know, what is really your mission in life? What do—

Jim: So, mission.

Dan: –you really want to do? Mission is No. 1. And the second one is “master.” Who is your master? Is it Jesus Christ? Is it money? Is it status? You know, who is your master? And third, then is who is your mate? Three very important decisions. And if you think about it, if you start differing on those from the beginning, it’d be start off seemingly like you’re very similar. But if you’re off on “master,” if you’re off on “mission,” you’re gonna be miles apart later.

It’s like two F-16 fighters taking off and they’re one degree off in their directions. Well, the first 10 feet, 100 feet, 100 yards, you might not notice. But a mile down, 10 miles down, if you’re one degree off, you’re in different lands. And I actually know of somebody who read this book and she and her boyfriend, the day they read it, they broke up that night, because they realized, hey, the guy said, “You’re into Jesus; I’m not. Your mission is to serve the church and serve Jesus’s purposes. That’s not mine.” And so, by the end of the night they said, you know, we need to break up, because there’s no future in this.

Jim: But what an emotional moment. I’m thinking and I don’t mean to be gender specific, but for a woman who is uncertain of her future and wants to be married, to have that conflict, you know, well, maybe if I just hang on to the relationship, he’ll come around and I will show him the way and he will accept Christ and we’ll have a better relationship. I would think, Lisa, a lot of women, this is a great tension for them in their 20s and 30s, maybe beyond that, a remarry situation, where you so desperately want a companion, a mate that you forego some of the red flags that Dan’s talkin’ about.

Lisa: Yeah, you absolutely do and a lot of it’s born out of fear in the sense of, if I let this guy go, will another one ever come along?

Jim: Right.

Lisa: And so, it’s that fear of have I passed up my best opportunity? Maybe this guy is good enough. And quite frankly, there are a lot of women out there and I have met them and I’ve been a little bit in this boat, where I’ve met a lot of Christian guys who are kind of lame. I mean, honestly. (Laughter) I’m gonna put it out–

Jim: I don’t think you need—

Lisa: –there.

Jim: –the Christian label in front of that frankly (Laughter), but—

Lisa: No.

Jim: –we’ll leave it there.

Lisa: But I’m saying, you would expect, you know, oh, he’s a Christian. He’s gonna have all his stuff together.

Dan, I want to give men and women some practical tools for finding a lifelong spouse and to help them think clearly about that decision. You have written about the “seven C‘s” in your book. Give us the list, and John, let’s post that if you–

John: Great idea.

Jim: –will let us, Dan on the website and—

Dan: Wonderful.

Jim: –then you’ll do the same on Boundless, Lisa. But let’s talk about those seven C‘s. What are they?

Dan: It’s just a basic checklist of looking at a person’s character, that’s the first C. And then there’s chemistry. Is there a pizzazz there? I know it’s not No. 1, but—

Jim: That’s okay; it’s important to—

Dan: Yeah.

Jim: –have that chemistry.

Dan: Yeah and sure, it’s not No. 1. It may be secondary, but it’s not 152; it’s No. 2. Then there’s competency. As Lisa was saying earlier, Can this guy keep a job? You know, is he competent in his word?

John: Uh-hm.

Dan: The fourth one is culture, knowing we come from different cultures. It could be ethnic; it could be religious. It could be educational. It could be financial, differences in culture. Commitment, where is he along the spectrum on commitment? Can … will he follow through? Will he be a promise keeper, so to speak. Communication, does he listen well? Does he articulate things well? Does he intuit what you’re feeling? And then lastly—

Jim: (Laughing)

Dan: –core values.

Jim: Maybe one out of 10 that hits that one on the nose.

Dan: Yeah. (Laughter) And then core values. And that’s what I was talking about earlier about mission and master. You know, what are some basic core values are you missing on that? But you know, I want to say, I always think it’s dangerous to give kind of a list, even if it’s a short list. But it’s more important to become the kind of person you want to marry, than to just look for the person who you want to marry.

Because I think oftentimes a guy will come up to me and says, you know, “I’m looking for a woman who’s, you know, a real prayer warrior and who really goes to worship all the time and really serves the poor and loves children and helps out at the church.” And then I ask, “Oh, so, how’s your prayer life?” “Well, not very good.” “You go to church often?” “Well, not really.” “Do you serve the poor?” “No.” “Do you like working with children?” “Well, no, not really.”

So, I say, “Oh, great; so you want to marry somebody who you’re not even like. Why would she like you, ’cause you’re not even like her?” And so, I think we have to become the kind of person we want to marry.

Jim: Well, and that raises something that you said in the book, the infatuation versus courtship. And this is very important biblically, because as the Christian community, we’ve got to get our hands around this. There’s a distinction, but we fall prey to the culture that we live in and really the media, the global media culture. I don’t think it’s just a U.S. issue.

I know friends in Canada and you know, places that “Focus on the Family airs around the world fall prey to the church acting more like the culture they’re in. And around dating, it’s certainly true and we become infatuated first physically. Psychologists will say that’s pretty normal, but for Christians, we’ve got to bridle that appetite and better understand the core character of the individual. That’s what you’re saying.

Dan: Yes and I think also, I think you’re dead on in that the church or followers of Christ has been seduced by the world in so many significant ways. As you just look at movies and premarital sex, for

When I speak on this topic to a variety of groups, whether it’s schools or churches or whatever, I just say, “Okay, just for fun, just list off for me, with all the millions of movies made, list all the movies that you can recall where a married couple is having romantic intimacy.”

Jim: Right.

Dan: And I say, “Go ahead.” And time and time again, they cannot come up with more than two titles. I say, “You gotta be kidding, with all those movies.” And that just shows the tremendous saturation we’re having of how it’s the other way. And so, if I said, “Oh, and how many movies show, you know, sex outside of marriage?” You know, a zillion hands go up and they can go on for hours listing all the different TV shows—

Jim: How—

Dan:–and movies.

Jim: –does a single build a hedge of protection, to use a great Christian cliché? How do we actually build that protection, to not let the culture seep into our own hearts, so that we protect our hearts?

Lisa: I would say, I mean, I think first of all, we have to pay attention to what we’re ingesting. Because I think that the way the church dates is so similar to the world, it’s because we’ve bought hook, line and sinker, the fact that, oh, this is the way it has to be done. If I’m gonna meet someone amazing, I expect this person to be perfect. I expect, you know, kinda to Dan’s point about movies, movies always end after that hour and a half, the romantic comedies do, with that couple getting together. You never see the story continue to all of a sudden, they’re married and they’re doing the dishes and they’re paying their mortgage and—

Jim: The normal stuff.

Lisa: –the real life stuff. Yeah. And so, that’s why I always tell singles, I’m like, get into the church and get into the lives of the married people in the church. Don’t hang around just with all the singles who are out, you know, goin’ out for pizza and that kind of stuff. Get into the lives of married couples. Ask to do dinner with them. Ask to show up at their home and see how they relate to one another. See what real marriages look like so you know what you’re signing up for, because what you’re seeing in the movies is not it.

Jim: And that’s good step in the right direction, Lisa, to become more real about it. This has been a great conversation, Dan and Lisa. I hope that singles and moms and dads with single adult children are encouraged by this. And you know what? In the past year, about 140,000 singles—that’s right, 140,000 singles—have told us we’ve helped them to prepare for marriage and that’s exciting. And you’ve helped us do this through www.boundless.org and in other ways. If you’ve not yet become a Friend of the Family here at Focus, can I ask you to get behind our efforts to build strong marriages today? Our culture needs strong marriages. We need to be able to show the benefit of marriage in a culture that’s losing the definition and the understanding of what marriage does to strengthen our society. And when you pledge to support us with a monthly gift of any amount, we’ll send you a copy of Dan’s book, How to Pick a Spouse.

Dan: And my book has study questions at the end of each chapter, so you can discuss it with your friends, in a small group, in your church.

Jim: Oh, that’s great.

Dan: And so, you can walk through it, with an audio

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Balancing Gender Differences in Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2)

Robert and Pamela Crosby help married couples understand and celebrate their gender differences so that they can enjoy a stronger bond and deeper intimacy. Our guests offer practical tips for improved communication, successful conflict resolution and offering affirmation to your spouse. (Part 1 of 2)

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 2

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Cherishing Your Spouse Every Day

Do you love your spouse, or do you truly cherish them? Gary Thomas encourages couples to make a daily effort to go beyond the ‘duty’ of love, and combat the natural inclination to drift apart, by choosing to see the best in their spouse.

Mr. Gary Thomas

Gary Thomas is an international speaker and best-selling, award-winning author whose books include Married SexSacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting. He has also written numerous articles for several prominent national magazines. Gary and his wife, Lisa, reside in Texas and have three children. You can learn more about Gary by visiting his website, www.garythomas.com.

cherish front cover

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.” Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book–Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

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Newest Release - Episode 2: Heroes Providing Hope

Discover the amazing work our PRC’s Directors, Nurses, and Volunteers are making in their communities! You’ll see firsthand testimonies of a PRC in action, and that there are other options outside of abortions! You’ll also discover how your family can support your local PRC!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 4: Sometimes the Choice is Hard

Hear real life stories of parents who have made the decision to choose life even though the circumstances were overwhelming. You’ll see why “ALL” life is precious to God and why choosing life is always the right decision!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 3: The Power of a Picture

Have you ever wondered what a baby looked like in the womb? With today’s technology, Moms and Dads can see the baby’s heartbeat, facial expressions, and movements! You’ll find out why more women choose life once they hear their baby’s heartbeat and realize it’s a real living human!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 5: It’s Going to be Amazing!

After a couple has chosen life, hear the heartwarming stories of children that culture would have cast aside, yet are making tremendous impacts in their communities. Whether the diagnosis was adverse or the circumstances were difficult, these stories will inspire you to come along side of families who have chosen life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Newest Release - Episode 6: Families Helping Families!

So, after all you’ve seen through the SeeLife ‘21 Episodic journey; what can you do now? We’ll share how you can partner with some amazing organizations that are making significant impacts in the pro-life movement! You want to Celebrate Life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 2

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Effective Habits to Embrace in Parenting

To be an effective parent, you must be a leader in your child’s life, guiding with a gentle hand and setting a solid example. Dr. Randy Schroeder provides the insight you need to be a leader-parent. As he explores the foundational Rs—relationship, routines, responsibilities, and rules—you’ll better understand the role you play in your child’s life. You’ll learn great phrases to employ such as “Either/Or/You Decide” and “When You/Then You”. While there is no perfect parent, this nuts-and-bolts material will equip you to lead your child in a loving, confident manner.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder has spent more than four decades writing, counseling, speaking, and teaching. For nearly 25 years, he was Vice President of Student Personnel Services, Dean of Students, and a professor of pastoral counseling at Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne, Ind. He’s also led a successful counseling practice helping individuals, couples, and families to thrive in their lives and relationships.

Cover image of Dr. Randall Schroeder's book "Simple Habits for Effective Parenting"

Simple Habits for Effective Parenting

Effective parenting is now within your grasp! With this inspiring how-to comprehensive book, achieve extraordinary results in raising a child to be self-assured, self-reliant, and responsible! You will be able to successfully lead and lovingly encourage your child toward a Godly life!

The Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage

God designed marriage to reflect His love to the world; and because of this, the enemy wants to destroy God’s beautiful design. Based on his book, Defending Your Marriage, Dr. Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff share about the reality of spiritual warfare against marriages, and how to combat the enemy’s lies with the truth of God. Couples will be encouraged that they’re not alone in the fight for a godly marriage and better equipped to be a shining example for the world around them.

Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff Cropped

Dr. Tim and Mrs. Noreen Muehlhoff

Dr. Tim Muehlhoff is a professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication, apologetics, gender, and conflict resolution.  Tim and his wife, Noreen, are both on staff with Biola’s Center for Marriage and Relationships  where he is a co-host of The Art of Relationship podcast. 

Defending Your Marriage

Is your marriage under attack? Sometimes it can feel like the world is trying to tear your marriage apart. Internal conflicts or external pressures might make you wonder if something sinister is going on. How can you tell if you’re facing spiritual opposition? And what can you do about it? Tim Muehlhoff provides a straightforward resource for protecting your marriage from the threats of the evil one. He looks at what Scripture says about spiritual warfare and how our everyday struggles have deeper spiritual realities. And he provides practical steps for guarding our marriages with the whole armor of God.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 1

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 2

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 2

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage - Part 2

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 1

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

How a Former Abortion Doctor Became Pro-Life

As an abortion doctor at Planned Parenthood, Dr. Patti Giebink believed she was helping women. Later, she began reading scripture and God gradually changed her heart on the abortion issue. Patti tells the story of her long journey from abortion doctor to pro-life and encourages listeners to share the message of life with compassion.

Headshot image of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Patti Giebink

Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

Cover image of the book "Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life"

Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life

Unexpected Choice is told from the perspective of a doctor who actually performed abortions through Planned Parenthood. The book chronicles her journey from being a pro-choice physician to someone speaking on behalf of the pro-life movement.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Thank you for committing to pray for the pre-born!

Sign up below for your free seven-day prayer guide. This daily guide will help give direction to your prayers for the pro-life movement. We will be praying with you!