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How Your Differences Strengthen Your Marriage

How Your Differences Strengthen Your Marriage

Family physician Dr. Walt Larimore and his wife, Barb, discuss how God designed the unique differences between men and women for our benefit, and how understanding and appreciating those differences can improve your marriage.
Original Air Date: May 6, 2013

Teaser:

Barbara: I like black coffee.

Chuck: Sugar and cream.

Barbara: I don’t mind sour things.

Chuck: I have the world’s biggest sweet tooth.

Barb: I’m a saver.

Chuck: I’m a spender.

Barb: I’m a planner.

Chuck: I’m impulsive.

Barb: When I’m lost, I’ll ask directions quickly.

Chuck: Asking directions is a sign of weakness.

End of Teaser

(Laughter)

John Fuller: I wonder if you ever feel like that couple where you’re married, and you, you love each other, but there are some things that are just really different about the two of you. And, uh, the question for you is this. Maybe, did you ever wonder if maybe God purposely designed those differences not to frustrate you but to compliment you. We’re going to explore that on today’s Focus on the Family with Focus president and author, Jim Daly. I’m John Fuller, and a fun conversation, Jim, for the next 25 minutes or so.

Jim Daly: Yeah. You know, John, I think God intended for both to happens. Sometimes, it’s a frustration, and sometimes, it’s a blessing that opposites attract. And, I think he knew what he was doing when he designed it. Um, you know, newlyweds have to be quaking in their boots right now thinking, oh no, what have I, what have I gotten myself into? Because they’ve seen it. Jean and I, we had that same experience. We went to premarital counseling thinking, we are so much alike.

John: Oh yes.

Jim: That’s why we’re in love.

John: Mm-hmm.

Jim: And (laughs) we went to counseling, and we walked out going, wow, we are really different, aren’t we?

John: (laughs) Good revelation.

Jim: Introvert, extrovert, all of those things that we just heard really played out even in my own marriage, and I think most people’s marriages, but today we’re going to talk about it, and we’re going to talk about it with two great friends of the ministry, Dr. Walt and Barb Larimore. And, it is great to have you back here at Focus.

Dr. Walt Larimore: Great to be back, Jim.

Barb Larimore: Thanks for having us.

John: We should note, Jim, that in addition to the Larimore’s, we have a number of our Focus Leadership Institute students joining us, and, uh, it might be a little bit of a revelatory conversation for them.

Jim: That was a big word you used there. (laughs)

John: It was. Well, they’re college students. They understood.

Jim: Revelatory. I like that. Uh, Walt and Barb, you guys were here in the 2000s. You spent time here. You were the official physician residence here at Focus on the Family, Walt. And, we so appreciated that service. And, in that, it’s a great place to start when we talk about the brain chemistry. Your book, His Brain, Her Brain, highlights those differences and those distinctions.

Dr. Larimore: Mm-hmm.

Jim: For so long, the culture has been telling us we’re all the same. You know, biologically, there’s no difference, but there is, isn’t there?

Dr. Larimore: There’s no question about it. One of the leading feminists in our country had a situation where she decided as a single mom to adopt a, a child. And, she adopted a little boy. And, she decided she was going to raise him in a gender neutral, peaceful, green home, which she did. But, when she got up to about two and a half, three years of age, one day, she made him a peanut butter sandwich, and he chewed it into the shape of a gun and shot her several times with it.

Jim: Oh.

Dr. Larimore: And, she said in a very honest editorial, she said, “The only people who believe little boys and little girls come out the same are people who are childless. (laughs)

Jim: Well, that’s probably true.

Dr. Larimore: Because we do see the differences, from, not only from birth, but in the womb.

Jim: Now, here’s the reality. When I talk to wives, they, I think, gladly tell me there are differences. Barb, isn’t that true?

Barb: Absolutely.

Jim: Do, do you think you and Walt are the same? (laughs)

Barb: No, heavens, no. Heavens, no. I, I knew from the get-go that we were probably pretty compatible, but we were as different as night and day.

Jim: Give us some examples of how you saw that.

Barb: Oh my goodness, he is so impulsive.

Jim: (laughs)

Barb: And I’m the non-risk taker of the family. I want to think it through. I want to plan it out, and he’s like, in the spur of the moment, let’s do, or let’s go, or, you know, when-

Dr. Larimore: She, she actually reads directions. I have no idea why.

Barb: Oh, and ask for directions? Are you kidding me?

Jim: (laughs) Yeah, right?

Barb: I mean, it’s the things that we see all the time.

Dr. Larimore: Right. I was going to put on pants this morning that I’d worn for the last five days. I mean, they were fine.

Jim: They were nice and clean, I hope. (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: But someone in my family thought …

Barb: They weren’t fine.

Dr. Larimore: … it was not the right-

Jim: It’s been five days. (laughs) Right.

Barb: Yeah, exactly.

Dr. Larimore: But, those differences that so dramatically draw us together when we’re courting or when we’re dating, in early marriage, can begin to drive us apart. They can distract us. They can disrupt us. If we don’t understand them, Jim, they lead to divorce. And so, the purpose of this book is to recognize where those differences came from that we believe they’re divinely designed, and when understood, allow a couple to realize you’re stronger together with your differences than you would ever be apart, and that’s the good news.

Jim: That is the good news.

Barb: And, the differences can be celebrated. You know, it’s not any big deal that you have to be ashamed of or anything. They are there because God has put them there, like Walt said, to bring you together.

Jim: Right, in the end, that’s the goal.

Barb: And to have more appreciation for the other person.

Jim: Well, let’s start from the beginning. I think it’s a great place to start. When you’re in your mother’s womb, Walt, you’re the physician. Uh, what is happening chemically to the little boy and the little girl that is different? Something happens even there.

Dr. Larimore: Oh, no question. In fact, uh, from conception through, ah, the first six or eight weeks, the little unborn baby is much more female than male, irrespective of whether it’s going to be a little boy or a little girl. And then, there’s a surge of hormones that occur sp- about six or eight weeks, and the little boy, it’s a surge of testosterone, and in the little girl, it’s a surge of estrogen. And that testosterone surge has a dramatic effect. For example, it makes his little developing bones much harder, so a little boy is born with harder bones than a little girl. And, there’s one bone (laughs) that is the hardest in him as he develops, and it’s his head. I mean, literally-

Jim: (laughs) This is just too good to be true.

John: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: He’s literally born hard-headed. And then, another thing that the testosterone does is that it makes his muscles, uh, more active. We like to talk about his brain being like a chest of drawers, and he’s got a box for everything, but he can only operate in one box at a time. Because her connection’s been preserved, she did not have that testosterone surge, she can multi-task much, much better than he can.

Jim: So, she just has one big drawer (laughs) and everything’s in there.

John: (laughs) It’s connected.

Dr. Larimore: Well, it’s, it’s all a guess-

Jim: Okay, I’m in trouble, now.

Barb: And, it’s all interconnected.

Jim: Gene’s going to get me for that one.

Dr. Larimore: No, no, it’s a- and, and that has wonderful advantages, but it does make you different. One of the most wonderful ones we learned about was what I, what I like to call the nothing box, that guys literally have a box that they can go into in their brain, and their brain does nothing.

Jim: It’s a great place.

Dr. Larimore: And, and Barb, for years, would ask me, “What are you thinking about?” And I would say …

Barb: He would say, “Nothing,” and I would think, well, let’s see, what have I done to make him want to avoid a conversation with me?

John: (laughs) Yes.

Dr. Larimore: Or, or-

Barb: You know, and you start getting in that little, uh, thinking, which is totally unproductive, and I-

Jim: So really, you’re overthinking.

Barb: Yes, and I thought he was just lying to me, and trying to put me off.

Dr. Larimore: But, that can become a very divisive thing. If she doesn’t know I, I have that nothing box, and now, Jim, the research is showing the average woman, not even the great woman, but the average woman can hear and independently process seven different audio signals at one time, so she can be talking on the phone, listening to Focus on the Family on the radio, listening to the TV in the other room, listening to one child in another room, another child in another room, and the husband in the garage, and she’s processing it all at one time without problems.

Jim: That sounds exhausting just thinking about that. (laughs)

John: Yeah, I’m thinking of going to the garage.

Dr. Larimore: Right. Now, his brain, the average guy, not the exceptional guy, the average guy can listen to and process one audio input at a time.

Jim: Mm-hmm.

Dr. Larimore: If you don’t know that, that can be very destructive. We, we were, a number of years ago, we were driving to the airport, and, um, so, we were listening to the radio, and Barb started to talk to me about something, and I turned the radio off, and she said …

Barb: You really don’t have to do that.

Jim: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: And for her brain, she didn’t, because she can listen to the radio and talk.

Jim: Right.

Dr. Larimore: And I said, “No, I do have to do that.” Well, that used to an- cause division, anger. Now that we understand the brain differences, we go … She realizes, when I turn that off, I’m honoring her, not dishonoring her. So, it’s one of hundreds of examples we have in the book that couples can look at, and Jim, some of these male differences, female members of our audience will recognize that in themselves, and some of the female differences, some of the guys will say-

Jim: But, these are general rules.

Dr. Larimore: But, as a general rule, we’re different when we marry, and if we recognize those differences and understand them, it actually strengthens us.

Jim: Barb, you’ve seen this play out very practically, because you like to mentor younger couples.

Barb: Mm-hmm.

Jim: So, you probably have seen this. How, as you have alluded to a couple of times here, how have you seen it, uh, be destructive in those newlywed couples?

Barb: Well, newlyweds think that they have to spend every waking minute with each other.

Jim: (laughs)

Barb: And, you know, yes, you want to, because that oxytocin level in her brain is soaring very high, and it’s a feel good, um, chemical, and, um, you know, things are still going well, and the fairy tale is coming true, but where you see all of this come together is when they start nitpicking at each other.

Jim: About the differences.

Barb: About their differences, because they’re-

Jim: Give, give us some of those.

Barb: … spending so much time together.

Jim: Give us some examples, just so we can catch it.

Barb: Well, you know, she might be the neatnik of the two, and he might leave his clothes from the time he comes in the door from the door to the bathroom to the bedroom-

Jim: (laughs) Ouch.

Barb: … to the den, you know? He doesn’t pick-

Jim: Okay, does that hit you, John?

Barb: … pick up after himself.

John: I’m not going to go there, Jim. (laughs)

Jim: Yeah, come on. Yeah, we need some real life, I’ll, I’ll go there, then, because this is one of the things for Gene and I (laughs) because I have, I keep kind of tidy piles of the (laughs)-

Barb: Piles.

Jim: … the, the shorts, just the, you know, the pants I wore one day, and they’re not dirty. Now, I’ve got a pile for that.

Barb: Yes.

Jim: So, and if it was the, the T-shirt I wore from 3:00 to 8:00 last night, y- you know, I can wear that one again. I’m actually thinking about laundry and all that.

Barb: Mm-hmm.

Jim: So, I’ve got that pile. Then, I’ve got those things, yeah, add the shorts I wore on the weekend, and I helped stain the outside of the house, and they’re kind of dirty, but next time I stain, I can wear those again. These piles drive Gene nuts, obviously. She doesn’t know my categorization (laughs) and-

Barb: Right, right.

Jim: She, it’s, yeah.

Barb: And so, you know, you, you do get a person like Gene who, who is very orderly, and then you come on the scene and-

Jim: (laughs) It drives her crazy.

Barb: … it really disrupts a lot of what’s going on in her psyche.

Jim: Well, you know, Barb, I’m actually pretty orderly on some things, like the toothpaste tube, but I have been married 26 years, and that one is still (laughs) one that Gene and I, she won’t put the cap back on that thing for some reason, and I, she says, “Well, I’m just going to turn around and use it in the morning.”

Barb: Well, and you know the easy solution to that is to buy two tubes of toothpaste.

Jim: (laughs) You know, I never thought of that.

John: (laughs) [crosstalk]

Barb: But, he’ll probably-

John: But, you’ll still see that one with the cap off.

Jim: (laughs) But no, we want to, you know, we want to share. (laughs)

Barb: Yeah, well …

Jim: But I, you know, so that’s more like, that’s more, probably, more personality oriented than gender specific. Would that be fair?

Dr. Larimore: Exactly, but another one would be odors.

Jim: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: Women, their ability to discern odors and fragrances is almost 10 times greater than the average guy.

Jim: Oh.

Barb: And especially when they’re pregnant.

Dr. Larimore: Mm-hmm, pregnant, and during the cycle. There’s cyclical changes, so Barb will, she’ll say, “How long have you been wearing those pants?” I’ll say, “I don’t know.” She’ll smell them.

Jim: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: And she’ll know.

Barb: And I can tell, and the, the closet-

Dr. Larimore: It’s like carbon-14 dating.

John: (laughs)

Barb: The closet will reek.

Jim: Smell him from a distance, I know. (laughs)

Barb: Yes, and the closet gets gross and stinky. You know, I really almost have to pull him upstairs and get him to smell it, but you know, he, he can’t smell that difference.

Jim: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: [crosstalk]

Jim: You know, I just got to say, you guys are giving me so much hope for my two boys right now.

Dr. Larimore: (laughs)

Barb: (laughs)

Jim: You are speaking to my heart, so-

Dr. Larimore: Well, Jim, we’ve gotten, that’s stunned us, how many letters and notes we’ve gotten from parents saying, because there’s a book written for married couples, but the surprise for us was the notes we’ve gotten from teachers, the notes we’ve gotten from engaged couples, and the notes we’ve gotten from parents saying, a mom like Gene saying, “Understanding these differences allows me to understand those boys differently.”

Jim: Well, but something you said is important, because again, for Gene and I, even in that discussion, it’s not that she is being hyper-sensitive to it.

Dr. Larimore: Mm-hmm.

Jim: She’s more inclined to smell those odors. That’s a big difference. The boys and I always say, “Gosh, Mom just, wow, she’s just over the top on that,” but you’re saying it’s because she’s (laughs) overwhelmed by it.

Dr. Larimore: Well, and it’s important for me to know, going to an office to take care of patients, many of whom are female, now, instead of being kind of resentful of Barb’s olfactory skills, now, I can appreciate them, because she helps me.

Jim: Mm-hmm.

John: Well, you’re listening to our guests today on Focus on the Family, Dr. Walt Larimore, his wife, Barb. I’m John Fuller. Our host is Jim Daly, and, uh, there is something that I could disclose at this point-

Jim: I think it’s time, John, whatever that might be. (laughs)

John: Well, I mean, so, this difference, um, that you lay out in the book, His Brain, Her Brain, in communication, one of the frustrating things that we have is Dina will, will look at me and just say, “Can’t you say something?” While we’re talking, and I’m just thinking, no, I’m, I’m letting it play out here. You have a need to express, and I’m not going to try to direct or, or step in too soon. Is that me avoiding a fight, or is that just me being a guy?

Dr. Larimore: It’s you being a guy. In fact, we had to spend two chapters just talking about the, not only the communication differences between men and women, the processing differences between men and women. For example, it takes the average male with a certain stress seven times longer to process that than it does the average female, and so it’s critical to understand that, that difference, and then-

John: And, I can share that stat with her, right?

Dr. Larimore: Well, and, but even more important-

Barb: That’s not going to win any brownie points.

John: Oh. Worth a try.

Jim: (laughs)

Dr. Larimore: Even more important is for her to understand how because her brain is designed to verbally process, her verbal centers, her hearing centers, and her emotional processing centers are very highly connected. His emotional processing center isn’t connected to his verbal processing at all. It’s actually connected to, it’s called the spinothalamic tracts. It’s his activity tracts. When he is stressed, he either needs to get alone, or he needs to go out and do something.

Jim: Chop wood.

Dr. Larimore: Exactly, go fishing.

Barb: Absolutely.

Dr. Larimore: Go for a run. When she’s stressed, she needs to talk, and most typically, to someone who’s a female. She cannot process without that talking. In fact, the data shows that women prisoners who are put into solitary confinement are much more likely to die quickly than men in solitary confinement, because they cannot emotionally process without that. So, in our marriage, it’s been important for, where there was a situation a couple years ago where a local ministry had a bunch of staff in a van, and the van wrecked, and five or six of the staff were killed, and a couple of others were in the hospital in the ICU. And, when we heard that, my response to that was, I just needed some time to, to think about it, to pray about it, to process it. Barb called her best friend, Penny. And, we used to get mad about that. Like, why can’t she talk to me? Why does she have to talk to Penny? Or, why does he go away? Why can’t he talk to me? Now, we understand that, but even better are the ways that Barb has taught me to talk.

Barb: You know, I, I started thinking about his office situation in seeing patients, that if somebody wants to see him, they make an appointment. So, I thought one day, you know, I’m going to try this. I made an appointment with Walt. I had him look me in the eye. The TV was not on. The radio was not on. There were no children around. I just went to him, and just said, “Walt, could I have a little of your time tonight?” So, I, I set an appointment. And then, I told him I only needed 10 minutes, so that let him off the hook. He knew that I would not be talking forever, and ever, and ever.

Dr. Larimore: You set, you set a limit for me.

Barb: I did set a limit.

Dr. Larimore: I thought I could tolerate 10.

John: (laughs)

Jim: (laughs) I’m not going there.

Barb: And then I gave, then, I gave him an agenda item.

Jim: Okay.

Barb: You know, a patient will make an appointment for a specific need, so I made the appointment, and told him up front the time limit and what I needed to talk about. And, you know what? He felt like a free man.

Jim: (laughs) No, it works. Gene has done that for us. I mean, she, uh, maybe she read His Brain, Her Brain. I’ll ask her tonight, but she actually-

Dr. Larimore: Well, no, girls, women actually, they do this naturally. When women are parenting a little boy, they’ll tell their little boy, “Look at me, look in my eyes,” because they know he’s so distracted, but their little girls, they don’t have to do that, because she can multitask. And, remember how we talked earlier about he has his boxes? It’s very hard for him to transition from one box to another box. It takes a little time to do that.

Jim: He needs to close the one box.

Barb: That’s right.

Dr. Larimore: So, you’ll see, you’ll hear moms do this. They’ll say, “Jimmy, 30 minutes till bedtime. 20 minutes till bedtime. 10 minutes to bedtime.” With their little girls, they tend not to do that, because it takes him time to get from that one box to another. And, Barb recognizing that differences says, if I’m down writing and-

Barb: Yeah. Truth be told, I still have to practice that with him.

Dr. Larimore: Yeah.

Barb: If I have dinner on the stove and almost ready to serve, I have to go downstairs and say, “Walt, 15 minutes till dinner. Do you think you can close it up, wrap it up?” And then, I’ll go down five minutes later, and then, “Five minutes till dinner. We’re, I’m serving whether you’re there or not.”

Jim: (laughs)

Barb: But the, the freeing thing is in teaching him how to talk to me, training him in that process, is that I let him know up front whether I want him to fix it, or if I want him to help me think through solutions.

Jim: So, you’re actually opening the box he needs to go to.

Barb: Yes.

Dr. Larimore: He’s built to fix things. That’s part of how God designed him, to lead, to fix, to conquer, to conquest, to be in projects, to do. He’s not nearly as relational as she is. And so, for her to say, “Walt, I want to talk. You don’t need to fix it,” and then I don’t have to think about, how do I fix this? Because if I do, and she doesn’t need that, that just angers her. That pushes her away. That, that doesn’t respond to her heart, which is what she needs me to do.

Jim: Here’s the one thing that I’ve noticed, though, also, in that environment, in parenting, particularly, when you’re parenting a boy. I think a mom can feel frustration because she sees it as disrespect that the little boy’s not responding, but he truly, in my opinion, as I have observed it, and being a boy, we’re not paying attention to you.

Barb: Mm-hmm.

Jim: You know, you’re talking to me, but my mind is thinking about superheroes, and you know what? If I go outside right now, I could play with the …

Dr. Larimore: Mm-hmm.

Jim: You know, you’re out there, and Mom’s going, “Wah, wah …” And I think that’s why Peanuts cartoons caught it pretty well with the adult voice in the cartoon always going wah, wah, wah.

Dr. Larimore: (laughs)

Jim: That’s what boys hear.

Dr. Larimore: And knowing this allows you to parent a little boy differently than you’re going to parent a little girl, to know that, that he’s not doing that because he’s trying to anger you, or he’s disrespecting you, but when you understand how he was built, and this isn’t evolutionary. This isn’t chance and time. This is God’s divine design, and scripture clearly indicates that God made male and female different-

Jim: Right.

Dr. Larimore: … and differently.

Jim: And we should embrace that, understand it, and then learn from it. Um, I would, I want to come to the defense of women, because I think, again, for Jean, with her brain wiring, and a woman’s brain wiring, there already there. They’re [inaudible] … They’re all connected, integrated, one big drawer, and I think I can understand, from that perspective, how a little boy or her husband could frustrate her. Do you feel that way, Barb, at times? It’s just frustrating, because Walt doesn’t get it.

Barb: Yeah, it is, but knowing these things that I know now, it helps me kind of approach what I want the end result to be from a little bit different angle. You know, like you said, my brain never turns off, and it, you know, sometimes, I find myself saying, “Well, I don’t have time for this. You know? You’re an adult. Let’s get it done,” but still, it’s just the chemical concoctions in his brain that are making him respond to me the way he is responding, and it’s not giving me the end result, so I have to think it through. I can either be frustrated, and ticked off at him, or I can approach it from a different angle.

Jim: (laughs) No, that’s good. Walt, I want to ask you, as a physician, because this one kicks around. You know, here at Focus on the Family, we get really difficult calls at times. And, and we want those calls to come. Um, but people that are experiencing depression, people that are having difficulty in their marriage because of these communication battles, how do you, as a Christian and a physician, much like Dr. Luke, I’m sure, bring your faith together? We’re chemically charged. You know, God uses these elements in this life to create our bodies and our brain. And, we fire in certain ways. Um, how do you reconcile that theologically, that when a person has biochemical depression, how do you sort that through as a physician and a Christian? Um, where is God in all of that?

Dr. Larimore: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Well, Jim, it’s a fallen world. It’s not the world that was created. It’s not the Garden of Eden, and so, since the fall, since we, as humans, chose to go our own way, things have changed. So, one way I li- I like with my depressed patients, because for decades in the Christian world, depression was considered the result of sin or sinfulness.

Jim: Right.

Dr. Larimore: It wasn’t seen as a, as a biological disorder, so I would often have to explain to Christians who were suffering from chemical depression that it’s kind of like diabetes. In diabetes, the pancreas isn’t making as much insulin as it’s supposed to. Insulin brings the blood sugar down, so, if you don’t make as much insulin, the blood sugar goes up. The same thing can happen in the brain. If the brain’s not making enough, say, of serotonin-

Jim: Right.

Dr. Larimore: … if that level’s low, then depression goes up. Chronic stress can lower serotonin. Certain types of diet can lower serotonin. Not having enough light can lower serotonin, so there could a variety of causes, including genetic causes. And so, I find in my patients that beginning to understand the brain’s design, it’s a little, three-pound organ, but it uses 20% of the blood flow, 25% of the oxygen, 20% of the calories we take in. There are more connections in the brain per second than in all of the computers in Colorado in a minute. I mean, it’s, it’s an amazing organ. Man was made one way, and it’s really interesting, because the Hebrew word there, Jim, is, um, a word that’s used for the making of a pot or a container. It’s something that’s a little bit rough, a little bit practical, a little bit rural, but it’s design to protect something. When you look at the Hebrew word that describes the creation of woman, it’s a completely different word. It’s a word that describes the creation of something very complex, very intricate, very precious, of great value. And then, you begin to see, at least for me, when I understood those two words, that part of my design is to protect Barb, that she has great value. And that’s why scripture in the New Testament tells me that it’s my responsibility to honor her, to cherish her, to nourish her. She’s built to respond to that. And she, in scripture, is given the admonition to admire, and to respect, and to compliment me, and I respond to that. Well, these differences, and we have four chapters of these differences. He needs respect, she needs love. He needs conquest. She needs security. We talk about, biologically, where those come from, but biblically, where they come from. And, Jim, the best picture I have in my mind is that you take two pieces of wood, different species of wood, different grains, different strength, different purpose, but if their dovetails are perfectly cut, when those two pieces of wood are put together, say, as a drawer, they now have a new function, a new purpose. They’re stronger together than they ever were apart. They’re still different, but they have this new function. And, this biblical design for his brain, her brain, for he and she, is that if God’s calling you to marriage, he’s calling you to be something together that you never can be apart. You’re still different, but you were made different and differently. Jim, it’s a great picture.

Jim: Ah, Dr. Walt Larimore, his wife, Barb Larimore, authors of the book, His Brain, Her Brain. And, I’m sure people will find it very helpful in their marriage communication and their newlywed steps. Thanks for being with us.

Dr. Larimore: Good to be with you guys.

Barb: Good to be here.

John: What a great and insightful conversation with Dr. Walt and Barb Larimore today on Focus on the Family. It really is always great to have them on and to have that reminder about God’s unique design for males and females, and how marriage seems to really enunciate those differences between us. Now, the Larimore’s book, His Brain, Her Brain, goes much deeper into the topic, offering perspective and practical tools to help make those differences work for your marriage. We’d love to send a copy of that book. It’s our way of saying thank you when you donate today to the ministry of Focus on the Family. Make a monthly pledge or a one-time gift of any amount when you call 800, the letter A, and the word FAMILY. 800-232-6459, or online at focusonthefamily.com/broadcast. Well, join us again tomorrow as we hear from Lee Strobel. He’ll explain the importance of leaving a legacy of faith for your children.

Preview:

Lee Strobel: You know, I really believe that the family is the answer for how we’re going to equip this next generation to be authentic, devoted followers of Jesus Christ, because I’m convinced this next generation has the potential to be the greatest generation that has ever lived for Jesus Christ.

Today's Guests

His Brain, Her Brain: How Divinely Designed Differences Can Strengthen Your Marriage

Receive our guests' book His Brain, Her Brain for your donation of any amount!

Recent Episodes

Promotional image for Focus on the Family broadcast "Embracing Your Role as a Spouse"

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

Pastor Kevin Thompson explores three primary roles in marriage – friend, partner, and lover – and explains how spouses can live out those roles optimally by investing in their relationship mentally, emotionally, and physically.

Promotional image for the Focus on the Family broadcast "Praying Scripture Over Your Child's Life"

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life (Part 2 of 2)

Jodie Berndt, best-selling author of the Praying the Scriptures book series, offers parents guidance for how they can more frequently and effectively pray for their children’s faith, wisdom, self-discipline, character, life purpose, and more. (Part 2 of 2)

Promotional image for the Focus on the Family broadcast "Praying Scripture Over Your Child's Life"

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life (Part 1 of 2)

Jodie Berndt, best-selling author of the Praying the Scriptures book series, offers parents guidance for how they can more frequently and effectively pray for their children’s faith, wisdom, self-discipline, character, life purpose, and more. (Part 1 of 2)

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Affair-Proof Your Marriage (Part 1 of 2)

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Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

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How a Former Abortion Doctor Became Pro-Life

As an abortion doctor at Planned Parenthood, Dr. Patti Giebink believed she was helping women. Later, she began reading scripture and God gradually changed her heart on the abortion issue. Patti tells the story of her long journey from abortion doctor to pro-life and encourages listeners to share the message of life with compassion.

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Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

Cover image of the book "Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life"

Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life

Unexpected Choice is told from the perspective of a doctor who actually performed abortions through Planned Parenthood. The book chronicles her journey from being a pro-choice physician to someone speaking on behalf of the pro-life movement.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 2

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Cherishing Your Spouse Every Day

Do you love your spouse, or do you truly cherish them? Gary Thomas encourages couples to make a daily effort to go beyond the ‘duty’ of love, and combat the natural inclination to drift apart, by choosing to see the best in their spouse.

Mr. Gary Thomas

Gary Thomas is an international speaker and best-selling, award-winning author whose books include Married SexSacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting. He has also written numerous articles for several prominent national magazines. Gary and his wife, Lisa, reside in Texas and have three children. You can learn more about Gary by visiting his website, www.garythomas.com.

cherish front cover

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.” Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book–Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

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Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

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Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

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Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 2

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Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

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Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

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Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder

Dr. Randy Schroeder has spent more than four decades writing, counseling, speaking, and teaching. For nearly 25 years, he was Vice President of Student Personnel Services, Dean of Students, and a professor of pastoral counseling at Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne, Ind. He’s also led a successful counseling practice helping individuals, couples, and families to thrive in their lives and relationships.

Cover image of Dr. Randall Schroeder's book "Simple Habits for Effective Parenting"

Simple Habits for Effective Parenting

Effective parenting is now within your grasp! With this inspiring how-to comprehensive book, achieve extraordinary results in raising a child to be self-assured, self-reliant, and responsible! You will be able to successfully lead and lovingly encourage your child toward a Godly life!

The Spiritual Battle for Your Marriage

God designed marriage to reflect His love to the world; and because of this, the enemy wants to destroy God’s beautiful design. Based on his book, Defending Your Marriage, Dr. Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff share about the reality of spiritual warfare against marriages, and how to combat the enemy’s lies with the truth of God. Couples will be encouraged that they’re not alone in the fight for a godly marriage and better equipped to be a shining example for the world around them.

Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff Cropped

Dr. Tim and Mrs. Noreen Muehlhoff

Dr. Tim Muehlhoff is a professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication, apologetics, gender, and conflict resolution.  Tim and his wife, Noreen, are both on staff with Biola’s Center for Marriage and Relationships  where he is a co-host of The Art of Relationship podcast. 

Defending Your Marriage

Is your marriage under attack? Sometimes it can feel like the world is trying to tear your marriage apart. Internal conflicts or external pressures might make you wonder if something sinister is going on. How can you tell if you’re facing spiritual opposition? And what can you do about it? Tim Muehlhoff provides a straightforward resource for protecting your marriage from the threats of the evil one. He looks at what Scripture says about spiritual warfare and how our everyday struggles have deeper spiritual realities. And he provides practical steps for guarding our marriages with the whole armor of God.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 1

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 2

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 2

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage - Part 2

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!