Dad Who Grew Up Fatherless Needs Advice and Guidance

What does it take to be a good father? I grew up without a dad. Now I'm married with kids of my own, and I'm not sure I'm leading my family in the way God intended. Do you have any advice?

It’s tough to grow up without a dad, but it appears your situation is not without its redemptive aspects. You understand – perhaps in a way that many other men cannot – just how important it is for kids to have a male role model in their lives. As a result, you’re motivated to become the best father you can possibly be.

The first thing you should do is look for a mentor – an older man who has experience as the head of a home and who can help you learn what it means to be a godly husband and father. Your church is a great place to begin the search. Ask your pastor if he can match you up with a mature Christian man in the congregation who would be willing to give you some guidance. If you attend a large church, it may have a strong men’s ministry that offers support groups designed to disciple men and help them develop into the kind of husbands and fathers that God wants them to be. Another excellent source of mentoring possibilities is the National Center for Fathering. Visit their website for information about their “Dads of Destiny” Program and other helpful resources.

If you’re not studying the Bible on a regular basis, we would challenge you to make that a priority. Chapter 5 of Galatians, Chapter 3 of Colossians, and Chapters 5 and 6 of Ephesians contain some great advice for Christian husbands and fathers.

It’s possible that your personal experience as a fatherless child has left you with some unresolved emotional issues. You’ll want to work through these as you seek to become the best dad you can possibly be for your own kids. Your wife may want to come alongside to encourage you in this process. Start by building a strong, healthy marriage. Then, on the basis of that firm foundation, work on your relationship with your children. If you call our Counseling department we can refer you to a licensed Christian family therapist in your area who will be able to assist you in this area.


If a title is currently unavailable through Focus on the Family, we encourage you to use another retailer.

Anchor Man: How a Father Can Anchor His Family in Christ for the Next 100 Years

The Book of Man: Readings on the Path to Manhood

Other Fatherhood resources


Promise Keepers

National Center for Fathering


Fatherhood: How to Be the Dad Your Family Needs


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