Heart Talk – Date Guide

By Greg Smalley
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Focus on the Family

Print this out and take it on your date!

Step 1: Go someplace different for dinner.

Step 2: Choose a Date Night activity designed to foster ICU and Heart Talk.

  • Go to your favorite café and spend the evening playing “The Ungame.”
  • Come to dinner with several different ideas each as to how you would like to spend the rest of the each. Try to reach a mutually satisfying decision by engaging in ICU and Heart Talk before moving into the problem-solving stage of the discussion. Then go for it!

Step 3: Relax and unwind. Ready to answer a few questions?

  • What was your favorite part of the evening?
  • What is the one thing you learned tonight that you didn’t know about me before?
  • What are some practical steps we can take to foster more Heart Talk at the center of our marriage? How can we become more intentional about resolving life’s practical problems by means of ICU?

Step 4: Home sweet home. Let’s plan our next date!

  • Talk about additional ways you can learn to communicate at a deeper, more feeling-based level in the coming week.

© 2015 Focus on the Family.

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About the Author

Greg Smalley

Dr. Greg Smalley serves as the Vice President of Marriage at Focus on the Family. In this role, he develops and oversees initiatives that prepare individuals for marriage, strengthen and nurture existing marriages and help couples in marital crises. Prior to joining Focus, Smalley worked for the Center for Relationship Enrichment at John Brown University and as President of the …

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