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Protect Your Marriage From Divorce

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Protect your marriage from divorce: Woman Preparing Bouquet Of Roses
Rob and Julia Campbell / Stocksy United

Focus on the Family is dedicated to bringing healing and restoration to couples who are struggling in their marriages. But God’s design for marriage never included abuse, violence or coercive control. Even emotional abuse can bruise or severely harm a person’s heart, mind and soul. If you are in an abusive relationship, go to a safe place and call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit TheHotline.org.

I hadn’t even made the turn into our driveway when I saw the scene. My husband’s Mazda was balancing precariously 5 feet in the air over a retaining wall. 

You might think my first reaction would have been, “I hope Carey’s OK!” 

Instead, with a disgusted shake of my head, I thought, You’re getting what you deserve. Now clean up your own mess. I imagined the scenario: Carey had tried to squeeze 10 tasks into the space of eight, fell behind, raced out the door 10 minutes late, sped through a three-point turn and voilà.

I felt no compassion or motivation to heal our marriage or protect it from divorce. That’s how bad our more than 10-year relationship had become.

Living with resentment

Fortunately, Carey found another way to get where he needed to go. When he arrived home, I was ready for a fight—or should I say another fight. We no longer had isolated arguments. They ran into each other because resentment and bitterness were constantly simmering under the surface of our marriage.
A provocative eye roll was enough to set one of us off.

I resented the way our life had no margin—the relentless cycle of too much work, not enough hours. I had often complained, “You’re saying yes to too many things, and this pace is wreaking havoc on us.” 

Carey had his own resentments. He saw all the housework that needed to be done and believed I wasn’t stepping up to help. According to him, I was too focused on other things and blew off his priorities.

The worst part was that our marriage should have been better. Protecting our marriage from a potential divorce should have been easy. After all, Carey was a pastor, and I volunteered at our church. We were also lawyers and had received training in divorce law. We’d seen up close what divorce can do to families—and how God can work to save marriages in crisis. But the truth was, I was on the edge of ending it all

If you find yourself in a similar place in your marriage, you understand those feelings of emotional dissatisfaction, frustration, anger and distress.
Who wants to live the rest of their days in misery? I remember the endless nights lying awake wondering, How can we make it? Do I even want to?

Yet we did make it. Carey and I just celebrated our 31st wedding anniversary. We’re living a marriage that not only measures up to our wedding-day dreams but also surpasses them. 

Lessons learned

How did Carey and I make it from that bad to this good? How did we protect our marriage from divorce? In addition to committed prayer, counseling and determination, we focused on four principles that helped us move toward a better marriage instead of divorce court. If you’re thinking about ending your marriage, I’d encourage you to first consider the lessons we learned. 

Lesson No. 1:
Grow your marriage and protect it against divorce

The principles of the harvest apply to marriage. As pastor Nicky Gumbel says, you harvest what you sow, later than you sow and more than you sow. 

Carey and I would not have survived in our marriage if we had continued planting the same old words and actions. We discovered that if we wanted a better harvest, we needed to start planting better seeds.

We saw firsthand that if we planted discord, we harvested chaos. If we planted resentment, we harvested contempt. But if we planted new seeds of kindness, self-control and respect, just to name a few, we began to see a miracle harvest in the making. Though it took time, the new seeds grew into thriving plants.

Lesson No. 2: 

See what is true about your spouse

One of our biggest problems was that we both believed we were right and the other person was wrong. In short, we had a problem with our eyes.

In Luke 11:34, Jesus said that when our eyes are healthy [the Greek word implies generous], we are filled with His light. But when our eyes are bad [the Greek word implies stingy], we fall into darkness. 

Here are questions Jesus might ask you about your marriage: How are your eyes? Do you see what is true about your spouse? Do you see what is true about you? 

I didn’t like what I saw. When Carey wrecked his car, instead of being generous in my response, I had been stingy. So first I had to ask Jesus to clear my eyes. 

I also had to ask Him to clear my ears to hear what He said. That meant I needed to take time on my own with Jesus—without child care responsibilities. My preferred time to pray and read my Bible is first thing in the morning. When our kids were babies, that routine didn’t work, so I chose evenings or nap times. 

I started with God, I have this problem. Please help! And then I laid it out and asked Jesus to show me what was true. I asked Him to do what only He can do: shine light into the darkness. Jesus answered by leading me to a Christian counselor, wise mentors and friends who could help me see my blind spots, which were contributing to unhappiness in my marriage.

Lesson No. 3: 

Cultivate peace

I met Marcus* when he and his wife, Katie*, were getting divorced. They had three kids between ages 4 and 9. Marcus ran a business, and Katie was a stay-at-home mom. He saw the problems in their marriage as a box he could pack up and leave behind.

Throughout the divorce proceedings, I heard both Marcus and Katie say they wanted what was best for their kids.
I could see they sincerely didn’t want their sons to be caught in the middle.

After the divorce was finalized, Marcus discovered the marriage box was taken away, but in its place he was handed a box containing different problems. Now the parenting schedule was a perpetual issue. His finances were tighter than he ever imagined.
His friendship circles imploded, and nights of fun disappeared. He had sources of conflict that he never dreamed would be a part of his life. 

And worst of all, their kids didn’t experience more peace.

Katie let slip how frustrated she was that Marcus didn’t pay support on time. She didn’t think about the emotional impact on her boys when she vented about her expenses. Marcus didn’t intend to complain to his kids that their mother didn’t care if he had no money left to spend on them. But they heard it.

When I saw Marcus again after the divorce, he looked at me through teary eyes and said, “If only I’d known then what I know now, I would have worked harder to save my marriage.”

Protect your marriage now

When our marriages are in distress, we may wonder whether we need to leave for the sake of our kids. After all, we think, Is this the model of love we want our children to grow up with? 

Having been a divorce attorney, I can say that walking out is not going to provide more peace for your children. The time to find peace and protect your marriage is now, before divorce. Children do need their parents to stop fighting in dysfunctional ways in front of them. They need to see them get past their cold wars, stubbornness and indifference. That is what will bring them peace.

If you think there’s no way this can ever happen in your marriage, humbly ask Jesus whether He agrees. 

Would planting tiny seeds of loving acts (not false feelings of affection) and messages spoken with a kinder tone disrupt the negativity you’re caught in? Could it be that Jesus is leading you to own something hurtful and genuinely apologize? Your willingness to take small steps for the sake of your children may create just enough hope to save your marriage.

Lesson No. 4:
Fight for “us” instead of “me.” 

In Ephesians 5:21, the apostle Paul said we should be “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Carey and I needed to learn to elevate the value of keeping our relationship strong over satisfying our individual desires. We needed to start thinking in terms of us instead of me. That meant we had to intentionally humble our attitudes and compromise some of our wants for the sake of our connection with each other. 

We started simply. Our interior-decor tastes are different. Whenever we redecorated our home, we argued over everything, clinging tightly to our own preferences. But as we began to fight for us, we became more patient and open-minded, willing to negotiate and respect the views and tastes of the other. We gave up our former way of incessantly trying to persuade the other person to adopt our own sense of style. Now our shared priority is for both of us to be satisfied with the outcome. 

To keep fighting for we when things get heated, we remember this motto: If I win, we lose. How can we win?

If I know Carey will be unhappy with a particular choice, I don’t push for it. Carey does the same for me. Both of us consider that a choice that leaves the other person unsatisfied is an unacceptable choice. As a result we’ve become more creative as we brainstorm potential solutions to our challenges.

Heal your broken marriage

At my lowest point, I didn’t want to take those first steps toward healing my broken marriage and protecting it from divorce. Taking those steps seemed too difficult. In light of the outcome, I can identify with the psalmist: “He who goes out weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of joy, bringing his sheaves with him” (Psalm 126:6). 

Weeping while planting the initial seeds of change in my marriage is an apt picture. I wasn’t filled with much hope or inspired by feelings of affection. I was filled with grief and despair. But I trusted Jesus with the hope of a harvest.

I could easily have followed my emotions out the door. But I’m grateful I didn’t. I’m grateful that the next time Carey had an incident with his car, my response was loving. And his responses to my mistakes have been generous as well.

Jesus offers Carey and me a power and a source of love that can’t be exhausted. He offers it to you and your spouse, too. The truth is that I couldn’t imagine the harvest God had for my marriage. I doubt you can see the harvest He has for you either. But trust Him, and you’ll find it on the other side of not giving up.

*Names have been changed.

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There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

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You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
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The Fruit of the Spirit Devotional is a free series of nine short videos to get you into God’s Word and inspire you to seek the Holy Spirit’s help in loving your spouse.

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Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 2

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Cherishing Your Spouse Every Day

Do you love your spouse, or do you truly cherish them? Gary Thomas encourages couples to make a daily effort to go beyond the ‘duty’ of love, and combat the natural inclination to drift apart, by choosing to see the best in their spouse.

Mr. Gary Thomas

Gary Thomas is an international speaker and best-selling, award-winning author whose books include Married SexSacred Marriage and Sacred Parenting. He has also written numerous articles for several prominent national magazines. Gary and his wife, Lisa, reside in Texas and have three children. You can learn more about Gary by visiting his website, www.garythomas.com.

cherish front cover

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

“Most marriages survive by gritting teeth and holding on. But marriages can and will not only survive but thrive when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another.” Those are the powerful words of bestselling author Gary Thomas in his newest book–Cherish. And in a world desperate for marriage redemption, it is needed now more than ever. Thomas shows that although there are a countless number of marriages consisting of two people just going through the motions, there are real ways this pattern can be reversed: when husbands and wives learn to cherish one another in proven, loving, and everyday actions and words.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 1

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

How a Former Abortion Doctor Became Pro-Life

As an abortion doctor at Planned Parenthood, Dr. Patti Giebink believed she was helping women. Later, she began reading scripture and God gradually changed her heart on the abortion issue. Patti tells the story of her long journey from abortion doctor to pro-life and encourages listeners to share the message of life with compassion.

Headshot image of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Patti Giebink

Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

Cover image of the book "Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life"

Unexpected Choice: An Abortion Doctor’s Journey to Pro-Life

Unexpected Choice is told from the perspective of a doctor who actually performed abortions through Planned Parenthood. The book chronicles her journey from being a pro-choice physician to someone speaking on behalf of the pro-life movement.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.