Custom CSS of Section contains Conditional Preview for See Life Campaign Elements

Setting Godly Boundaries in Marriage

Share:
Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email
setting-godly-boundaries-in-marriage
Photo by Belle Collective on Unsplash
Just as God drew a boundary to protect Adam and Eve, setting clear boundaries in marriage safeguards us from temptation and cultivates deeper intimacy.

“Satan got Eve to doubt God by first getting her to doubt herself. ‘Eve, my dear, perhaps you misunderstood. Because I can assure you, you won’t die.'”Secure in Heart, p. 151

As I travel across the country speaking and talking with women, I hear a scenario described often. A woman marries a Christian man. Because he is a follower of Christ, she doesn’t even consider he might be engaged in a secret war against impurity. But then, slowly, signs emerge. He stays up late into the night online. When she enters a room where he is watching television, he quickly flips the channel. Then, after a sermon or men’s retreat, he confesses one of his many encounters with pornography.

She is devastated, and rightly so. But she doesn’t think to ask if there is more. She just wants it to be over. Surely he won’t do it again, now that he knows how much this hurts me.

Some brave women also describe their own struggles with bringing impurity into their marriage. For instance, she starts off reading steamy romance novels in order to get an emotional high without the pain of confronting issues with her husband. Eventually, yearning for more than her novels can deliver, she ends up addicted to pornography or in a secret emotional affair.

It’s easy to see why purity struggles tend to only intensify with time. And unfortunately, when one spouse introduces impurity into marriage, and the other doesn’t draw a clear boundary, both partners suffer losses.

What is a boundary?

In marriage, think of a boundary as a limit we set that protects the sacredness of our marriage – keeping us far from anything that could hurt our relationship. Certainly, God’s plan for sexual purity has always included boundaries. As Solomon said of the wayward woman, “Keep a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house…” (Proverbs 5:8).

We shouldn’t be surprised then that Satan’s very first attack on Adam and Eve came in the form of an all-out assault on the only boundary God had set. “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden?'” (Genesis 3:1).

One thing is for sure, Satan’s enticing lies then sound eerily familiar to the way he attacks today:

  1. Did God really say? Who says this is wrong? How could it be wrong when it looks and feels so good?
  2. What are God’s motives? Is God withholding from you? Does God want you to miss out on knowledge? Pleasure?

Often Satan seeks to desensitize us to the harmfulness of impurity by taking us there one small boundary break at a time. The truth is that God’s boundaries are evidence of His goodness and His desire to protect us from painful consequences. And, if you look at the many Scriptures that set sexual boundaries in context, you’ll find that they are wrapped in love:

Boundary

God’s Love

No coarse joking, not a hint of sexual immorality (Ephesians 5:3).

“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love…” (Ephesians 5:1-2).
Treat younger men as brothers and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity (1 Timothy 5:1-2).

“Watch your life and your doctrine closely … save both yourself and your hearers” (1 Timothy 4:16).

Keep the marriage bed pure (Hebrews 13:4).

“Keep on loving each other as brothers” (Hebrews 13:1).

Learn to control your body in a way that is holy and honorable (1 Thessalonians 4:4). “May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other …” (1Thessalonians 3:12).

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

Setting boundaries

Dave and I have come to see boundaries as our best friends – calling us to the highest expression of our love. Our boundaries include:

  • Not a hint of immorality. Neither of us is alone with someone of the opposite sex without advance permission from the other. We refrain from movies, books or magazines with full or partial nudity, or sexual innuendo.
  • Absolute purity. Dave confesses sexual temptation early. I make it safe to have the discussion.
  • Keeping the marriage bed pure. We focus solely on each other through eye contact and open communication.
  • Walking in the light. We’ve agreed not to initiate or receive lovemaking if there is unconfessed sexual sin or broken boundaries; we first confess and repair the rift.

Establishing good boundaries will not only help protect your marriage, but it will also create a refuge where you can taste the glorious freedom of being naked and unashamed (Genesis 2:25).

But what if you’ve already taken some blows in the arena of impurity? Television?

Dynamic CTA Template Below

Your Teen Needs You Most of All

No parent of teens is perfect and even the best can learn how to better connect with their son or daughter. Get practical action steps to better connect with your teenager in 8 Essential Tips for Parenting Your Teen in this FREE video series!

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
Emerson-Eggerich4-840w

Understand How to Respect and Love your Son Well

Why doesn’t my son listen to me? Have you ever asked that question? The truth is, how you see your son and talk to him has a significant effect on how he thinks and acts. That’s why we want to help you. In fact, we’ve created a free five-part video series called “Recognizing Your Son’s Need for Respect” that will help you understand how showing respect, rather than shaming and badgering, will serve to motivate and guide your son.

Reconnected: The Digital Experience

Is the love there, but not the spark? Reawaken fun in your marriage and move from roommates to soulmates again with the help of this 7-part online video experience. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually as husband and wife using techniques such as dreaming together and establishing deep, heartfelt communication. The Digital Experience includes 7 teaching videos, an online study guide and access to additional tools and resources to help spouses reconnect.

Next Steps: Marriage Assessment

We want your marriage to be thriving and healthy. Take the free Marriage Assessment from Focus on the Family to learn how to strengthen your bond with your spouse and get the tools to help you need to grow closer together. 

Next Steps: Fruit of the Spirit Devotionals for Couples

The Fruit of the Spirit Devotional is a free series of nine short videos to get you into God’s Word and inspire you to seek the Holy Spirit’s help in loving your spouse.

Share:
Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email

About the Author

You May Also Like

Boundaries

Do Your Kids Have Healthy Phone Habits?

Our kids’ mental health has nearly been narrowed down to two words: Likes and Followers. Learn how to approach habits for your kids and phones.

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 5: It’s Going to be Amazing!

After a couple has chosen life, hear the heartwarming stories of children that culture would have cast aside, yet are making tremendous impacts in their communities. Whether the diagnosis was adverse or the circumstances were difficult, these stories will inspire you to come along side of families who have chosen life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 4: Sometimes the Choice is Hard

Hear real life stories of parents who have made the decision to choose life even though the circumstances were overwhelming. You’ll see why “ALL” life is precious to God and why choosing life is always the right decision!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 6: Families Helping Families!

So, after all you’ve seen through the SeeLife ‘21 Episodic journey; what can you do now? We’ll share how you can partner with some amazing organizations that are making significant impacts in the pro-life movement! You want to Celebrate Life!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 3: The Power of a Picture

Have you ever wondered what a baby looked like in the womb? With today’s technology, Moms and Dads can see the baby’s heartbeat, facial expressions, and movements! You’ll find out why more women choose life once they hear their baby’s heartbeat and realize it’s a real living human!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 2: Heroes Providing Hope

Discover the amazing work our PRC’s Directors, Nurses, and Volunteers are making in their communities! You’ll see firsthand testimonies of a PRC in action, and that there are other options outside of abortions! You’ll also discover how your family can support your local PRC!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

Play Video

Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!