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A Father, A Husband, A Man

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Dad holds toddler on boat dock

The prevailing framework with which dads approach their role in the family is as an equal partnership with their wife.  Dads view their role as that of a team player with shared responsibility with their wife rather than split responsibility.  Instead of taking sole ownership for the financial support of the family, many dads share this role with their wife.  In return, they play active roles in caring for the children and completing other domestic duties.  In this shared responsibility fathering role, dads, as well as moms, deal with the daily frustrations of getting children ready to leave and the hassles of shuttling them to their activities. 

Even very traditional dads tend to have less of a split-responsibility partnership, and more of a shared-responsibility partnership.  These dads complete a variety of domestic duties and reject conventional divisions of household labor.  Traditional dads see completing domestic duties as one of the best ways to love their wife sacrificially.  Other dads see completing domestic duties as just a natural extension of having a household or the only way tasks will be done the way that they like them.  Most dads will take at least some responsibility for childcare and cleaning the house while their wife will often contribute to the family financially and do chores such as mowing the lawn.

Jake explains this approach by sharing, “We’re a team, my wife and I.  There’s nothing that I can’t do or won’t do for the kids and vice versa.  She does everything from, you know, dog care to, you know, working outside, working in the yard.  We don’t have one task that’s just mine.  We don’t have one task that’s just hers…So, our family’s important and we’re together… We’re doing it as a team together.”  This team approach is so prevalent in dads; most children are spending healthy amounts of time and developing meaningful relationships with both their moms and their dads.

Dads have a stronger connection with their children as a positive outcome from this shared-responsibility arrangement.  Most dads hold significant responsibility in caring for the daily needs of their children.  The overwhelming majority prioritize their activities in order to maximize time with their families.  As a result of the large amount of time dads are spending with their children, they experience a high level of emotional warmth in the relationships they have with their children.

When both parents work and the dad’s job begins later than the mom’s job, dads typically shoulder the entire responsibility for getting children ready in the mornings.  Even dads with an early morning commute are usually involved with the children’s morning routines.  They are also every bit as engaged in bedtime routines as they are in getting the kids ready in the mornings.  Many dads use bedtime as an opportunity to intentionally build their relationship with their children.

In addition, most dads anticipate the time they will get with their families on the weekends.  Some dads, such as Joseph, integrate time with their children with their chores.  “More often than not, it’s all together, and it’s a lot of fun.  So sun up to sun down, we use that time.  We might run a lot of shopping errands…sometimes groceries, sometimes other things.  Just a lot of running around, but we do it together… We try to throw in a store that we know they like to look at, a toy store… to do yard work, maybe the kids will come outside, and they’ll play in the swing or they’ll ride their bike and I take breaks and help them with that and we laugh.”

Dads will do anything for their kids.  Most dads rate themselves highly as fathers because of their heavy level of involvement with their children.  Not only are dads succeeding as fathers in holding an integral part of their children’s daily life, but they also tend to rate themselves highly on the emotional affirmation they provide for their kids.  Dads have an especially strong sense that the way they interact with their girls and the example they set in marriage will shape their daughters’ future interactions with potential romantic partners.

The negative outcome of parents sharing household responsibilities rather than splitting them is that the dual involvement can often lead to conflict between husband and wife concerning the best way for tasks to be accomplished.  Dads say that the lack of clear-cut gender roles creates disagreements as it forces families to tediously coordinate every aspect of household responsibilities.  Disagreements are unequivocally dads’ least favorite part of being a husband.  Dads especially dread fighting over different parenting approaches.  They have strong aversions and responses to disagreements with their wife.

Family Challenges

Dads tend to feel better prepared to meet the logistical needs that their children have than they do to meet the emotional needs of their wife, especially when their kids are younger.  A very prevalent duty husbands discuss is listening to their wife, but this duty is often referred to with a negative tone.  Dads recognize this as critical to being a good husband, but many do not particularly relish the task.  Dads complain about having to hear the same facts multiple times and having to just listen rather than helping their wife find a solution.  Yet even when they don’t enjoy the task, dads see it as their duty to listen to their wife daily, and even more when she’s processing stressful circumstances.

Most dads feel like they are failing to meet their wife’s emotional needs.  This is often related to the frustrations they have in actively listening to their wife.  Some dads say they lack the patience to be consistently engaged emotionally.  Others say that they already know what she’s going to say so they get distracted.  For many dads, finding time alone with their wife is the biggest barrier to being emotionally supportive.  These dads are not insensitive to their wife’s needs, but they are struggling to meet them because providing emotional support does not come naturally for them.

Dads, especially those with younger children, have an easier time meeting the logistical needs that their kids present.  They may get frustrated with their kids constantly interfering with their sleep, but they are usually able to muster the physical resources to take care of what their children need without feeling as personally drained.  Ryan explains how easily he handles even the less pleasant tasks of parenting, especially in the light of the joy he finds in the role.  “I’m just tickled to death to be a father and to have these kids…I’m just loving every second of it.  And I guess that’s the answer to ‘what is my favorite part?’ Everything.  From dirty diapers to giving them baths, to getting them dressed, to watching them learn, to the questions.  My daughter is three now and every second is a question…I love singing my daughter to sleep, putting her to bed and cuddling with her, brushing her hair, talking about her day… I really love every single second… There really is no least favorite part, even the inconvenience of just having to leave work a little early to pick the kids up at daycare if they just got a whooping cough… that really rolls off my back, like water off a duck… There’s no pity for myself anywhere and it’s all just like I’m so happy that I get the opportunity to be the guy that comforts my daughter when she’s sick, cleans up after the kids, teaches her how to ride a bike.”

Feedback

In stark contrast to the devotion with which Ryan approaches even changing diapers and cleaning up after the kids, he says, “I probably don’t put near the energy into being a husband, unfortunately, that I do into being a father.”  This preference for the role of dad above the role of husband is common, but what causes it?  Ryan, who adores his children, and is idolized by them, says that some days it seems like his wife is always “complaining and creating issues,” so although he realizes his life is “richer, more rewarding, and more enjoyable” with his family, sometimes he thinks that it would be easier if he had his own apartment and could come home to relax in peace.

With the multitude of decisions couples must make together and the myriad of expectations that many women have for their partner, the relationship between dad and mom is often fraught with conflict.  Parents care so deeply about the well-being of their children, but all too often do not agree on the best path to ensure a secure future for them.  This almost inevitably causes disagreements to ensue.  These negative interactions can often strain a marriage.

Children, on the other hand, have a tendency to be adoring of their dad, which can meet a very deep need for him.  Cameron gives an example of this in sharing, “My favorite part about being a father is… when I see my children after a long day at work and they run and hug me and say, ‘Daddy, I miss you, I love you.’  And it’s pretty much an everyday thing.  And then one of the things that I notice that…they work hard to please me and make me happy.  And that’s something that I love about them…when they play sports…when they’re dancing… they really want me to be happy and proud of them…that’s the best part of being a father… I don’t care how long my day is, I don’t care what I’m doing, when I see my children and they tell me they love me and they hold me, it makes me feel good.”

Receiving positive feedback from their children while being critiqued by their wife sets the stage for many men to prioritize their relationships with their children above the relationship they have with their wife.  Most dads think that they are doing a pretty good job as a father, certainly better than they are doing as a husband.  Part of this difference between the roles of husband and father comes from the great enjoyment the men find in being a dad.  As a result, many men invest more heavily into their role as a dad.

Although this is common, it is certainly not universal.  For some dads, having kids is their favorite part about being a husband.  For other dads, though, their favorite part about being a husband is being alone with their wife, so they are excited for the kids to grow up.  Either way, there is consensus among all dads that for the present, having kids and being a family is a “beautiful thing.”

Accomplishment vs. Enjoyment

Partially as a result of the more complicated relationship men share with their wife, many have a deep sense of accomplishment in successfully maintaining their marriage.  In fact, a commonly shared favorite aspect of being a husband is the commitment and maturity that marriage requires of them.  They appreciate being required to mature and be committed because this makes them a better person and they are very proud of the relationship they have with just one woman.  One dad said that his favorite part of being married is knowing that he’s a part of God’s purpose.  Others say that the biggest challenge of being a husband is beating the statistics to keep their family together.  Very honestly, several dads admit that the way marriage forces them to be less self-centered is simultaneously their favorite and least favorite part.

Jamell crystallizes the sense of accomplishment he feels in being a husband.  “I love being married.  I love being with one woman… It gives me a sense of self-importance, self-value to be with one person and to be able to commit with one person, when there’s so much out there, so many temptations that humans are confronted with… So to be able to turn away from that life, to be with one person for the betterment of two people, I love the fact.  That keeps me happy, with knowing that I made the good decision to get married.”

In contrast to the accomplishment dads feel in being a husband, they tend to find deep enjoyment and fulfillment from being a dad.  When dads are talking about their favorite aspects of being a father, they get the biggest smile on their face.  Several say that “everything” is their favorite part of being a dad.  Dads delight in being with their kids and watching them grow.  They find a special kind of satisfaction in helping their children master new qualities and skills.  The time dads share with their children is precious to them.

Most dads do not share a least favorite part of fathering.  Among the few who actually shared, their least favorite is the same as their favorite, watching their kids grow up.  While some of the greatest enjoyment in being a father comes from helping their kids discover the world and successfully master new skills, this same process can also be heartbreaking as dads realize how quickly their children are growing.

Perhaps William best sums up what so many dads feel when considering their roles of husband and father. “Favorite part about being a husband is my family.  I think if I was a husband without kids, that would be pretty challenging.  I do love my wife, don’t get me wrong, but I definitely appreciate my family, kids, the whole family life.”

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There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

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You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
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Is the love there, but not the spark? Reawaken fun in your marriage and move from roommates to soulmates again with the help of this 7-part online video experience. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually as husband and wife using techniques such as dreaming together and establishing deep, heartfelt communication. The Digital Experience includes 7 teaching videos, an online study guide and access to additional tools and resources to help spouses reconnect.

Next Steps: Marriage Assessment

We want your marriage to be thriving and healthy. Take the free Marriage Assessment from Focus on the Family to learn how to strengthen your bond with your spouse and get the tools to help you need to grow closer together. 

Next Steps: Fruit of the Spirit Devotionals for Couples

The Fruit of the Spirit Devotional is a free series of nine short videos to get you into God’s Word and inspire you to seek the Holy Spirit’s help in loving your spouse.

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A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!