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Faith Conversation: Listen First, Speak Second

By Melissa McNulty
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Spouses can't always agree, but how they respond to disagreements can either strengthen or strain their marriage. Learning to listen first and speak second in emotionally charged discussions is important. 

As a couple, discuss the book of James. Read each chapter together or individually, then focus your conversation on the passage and discussion questions below. 

“Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger” (James 1:19).

  • When you were growing up, how did people in your family act when they were angry?
  • What are the positive and negative ways we respond to each other when we’re angry?
  • What can I do to make sure you feel heard when we’re having a disagreement?

A married couple cannot agree all the time, but how they respond to disagreements can either strengthen or strain their marriage. It may take practice, but learning to listen first and speak second, especially in emotionally charged discussions, is important. Waiting until your anger has subsided to discuss hurt feelings with your spouse can also help.

Do you know of a marriage in crisis? Learn more about Focus on the Family’s marriage intensives by visiting HopeRestored.com.

Copyright © 2014 by Focus on the Family.

Learn How to Cherish your Spouse and Have a Deeper Connection

Do you cherish your spouse? Couples who cherish each other understand that God created everyone different, and as a result they treasure the unique characteristics in their spouse. We want to help you do just that. Start the free five-part video course called, “Cherish Your Spouse”, and gain a deeper level of connection with your spouse.

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