Time Together — A Perfect 10 Marriage Meditation

By Bill Arbuckle
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a man and woman dance together in a kitchen.
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There is no secret formula to a lifelong love. It takes commitment. It takes work. And it takes time. Time spent together.

Getting Started

  • Read today’s marriage devotion.
  • Share today’s question with your spouse.

Today’s Video

Today’s Devotion

On a scale of one to 10 — with 10 being the highest — where do you rate your marriage?

We all want a perfect 10. But can two imperfect people have a perfect 10 marriage?

During the recent Perfect 10 Marriage event, Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley — authors, counselors and Focus on the Family’s marriage experts — invited couples from around the world to share how they’re working toward a perfect 10 marriage.

The “Perfect 10” couples talked about five major challenges all marriages face … and what they’re doing to overcome those challenges.

The five challenges include:

  • Communication
  • Time Together
  • Shared Responsibility
  • Conflict
  • Intimacy

To help you work through these challenges in your marriage, Focus on the Family has created a series of devotionals to address each issue and offer Bible-based tips for you and your spouse.

You might not think that the Bible has a lot to say about spending time with your spouse. While it never specifically mentions date nights or weekend getaways, it does have a lot to say about our relationship with your spouse. Let’s take a look.

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Scripture Reading

  • Ecclesiastes 9:9 — “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.”
  • Ephesians 5:25 — “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
  • First Peter 4:8 — “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.”


The year was 1925. A man from the American Midwest introduced the nation to “radiovision” and broadcast a 10-minute video to Washington, D.C. The Grand Ole Opry made its first radio broadcast from Nashville, Tennessee, and the “Scopes Monkey Trial” opened the door to teaching evolution in schools. Meanwhile, on the other side of the world, Karam and Kartari Chand entered an arranged marriage in India.

As the years passed, the Chands watched the world change around them. Charles Lindberg crossed the Atlantic Ocean. The world marched to war in the 1940s. Television became a worldwide source of news and entertainment. The Cold War started — and ended. Man walked on the moon. The internet launched a worldwide communications renaissance. But one thing never changed: Karam and Kartari Chand’s love for each other. In 2015, the Chands reached a one-of-a-kind milestone: their 90th wedding anniversary. By that time, Karam Chand was 110 years old. His wife was 103. Mr. Chand died in 2016 — a month shy of his 111th birthday. Mrs. Chand passed away in January 2019. Their story is a reminder that love can last a lifetime.

How to cultivate a lifelong love

There is no secret formula to a lifelong love. It takes commitment. It takes work. And it takes time. Time spent together.

Many couples are strapped for time. They’ve allowed life to crowd their schedules with good things: work, volunteer opportunities, school events and hobbies. But couples often forget to make time to spend together.

Spending time with your spouse is critical. The Bible talks about it in Ecclesiastes 9:9: “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun.” (In this Scripture passage, “vain” refers to the fact that life is a vapor that quickly vanishes.) In other words, life passes quickly. Make sure to enjoy time with your spouse.

What does spending time together look like? It’s everything from a date night to snuggling together on the couch to watching a favorite movie to taking a few minutes to talk to your spouse when you come home from work. It doesn’t have to be complicated. What matters most is that you and your spouse take regular time to connect and enjoy your life together.


Heavenly Father, life passes so quickly. Help us take time to enjoy life together. Amen.

Today’s Question

How can we spend more time together as a couple?

Additional Resources

© 2020 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. Originally published on FocusOnTheFamily.com.

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