Yes, DOUBLE MY GIFT to help families!

Yes, DOUBLE MY GIFT to help families!

Yes, Double my gift to help families!

Facebook and Your Marriage

By Tricia Goyer
Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email
Laura Perez

Although Facebook can be fun, it's not always the best thing for a marriage. When you get wrapped up in your online social life, even innocent interactions can divert your time and attention.

I smiled as I read a new post from a high school friend. We joked online about the songs we’d loved, the games we’d played and the boys on whom we’d had crushes. Facebook helped us re-establish an old friendship.

Then I noticed on my friend’s page that one of her “friends” was an old boyfriend of mine. I knew that with one click of my mouse I could re-establish communication. Would he be excited to hear from me? Had he thought about me over the years? The idea of reconnecting with him was tempting, but I knew that doing so would break my husband’s heart.

Although Facebook can be fun, it’s not always the best thing for my marriage. When I allow myself to get wrapped up in my online social life, even innocent interactions can divert my time and attention. It’s essential that I guard against distractions so that my husband never has to wonder which “friend” is most important in my life.

The Time Factor

When I first began using Facebook, I was often surprised how quickly the hours passed. And sometimes the phrase “Just a minute!” was used to the detriment of the man I love. One thing that’s helped me is to set limits. My time spent with online friends is now limited to 30 minutes after my husband goes to work and another 30 minutes before he comes home.

The Transparency Factor

Another goal I’ve set for myself is a commitment to complete transparency with my spouse. He has access to my Facebook account and is free to read my posts, comments and messages at any time. I have the same access to his account.

The Respect Factor

I strive to be positive on my Facebook page. If my husband has said or done something that frustrates me, I do not share it. Instead, I express my appreciation for him, giving him respect through my words. In this way I’m showing honor to the man I love by not participating in online gossip.

The Accountability Factor

Finally, I’ve asked my husband to let me know if I say or do anything to hurt or frustrate him concerning my Facebook usage. This accountability has allowed me to strengthen my marriage even as I’ve enjoyed the thrill of reconnecting with old friends online.

How strong is your marriage? Find out today with the Focus on Marriage Assessment. This reliable assessment is based on the research and experience of Focus on the Family’s marriage experts Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley. Take this free assessment now. 

Copyright © 2011 by Tricia Goyer. Used by permission.

Learn How to Cherish your Spouse and Have a Deeper Connection

Do you cherish your spouse? Couples who cherish each other understand that God created everyone different, and as a result they treasure the unique characteristics in their spouse. We want to help you do just that. Start the free five-part video course called, “Cherish Your Spouse”, and gain a deeper level of connection with your spouse.

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email

How useful was this article?

Click or Tap on a star to rate it!

Average Rating: 0 / 5

We are sorry that this was not useful for you!

Help us to improve.

Tell us how we can improve this article.

About the Author

Tricia Goyer

Tricia Goyer is a best-selling, award-winning author of more than 50 books, including contemporary and historical novels and non-fiction titles offering hope and encouragement. She has also published more than 500 articles and appeared on numerous national TV and radio programs. Tricia regularly contributes to several blogs for Christian moms and homeschooling parents in addition to her own. She is …

Fill out the form below, and we will email you a reminder.

Focus on the Family

Have Focus on the Family resources helped your family during the coronavirus pandemic? Share your story today and inspire others!