Shared Responsibilities — A Perfect 10 Marriage Meditation

a couple cheers each other on while doing chores
© makistock/Adobe Stock
While are no spiritual laws for vacuuming or dusting, the Bible has things to say about how couples can deal with chores. But it’s not easy.

Getting Started

  • Read today’s marriage devotion.
  • Share today’s question with your spouse.

Today’s Video

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Today’s Devotion

On a scale of one to 10 — with 10 being the highest — where do you rate your marriage?

We all want a perfect 10. But can two imperfect people have a perfect 10 marriage?

During the recent Perfect 10 Marriage event, Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley — authors, counselors and Focus on the Family’s Marriage Experts — invited couples from around the world to share how they’re working toward a perfect 10 marriage.

The “Perfect 10” couples talked about five major challenges all marriages face … and what they’re doing to overcome those challenges.

The five challenges include:

  • Communication
  • Time Together
  • Shared Responsibility
  • Conflict
  • Intimacy

To help you work through these challenges in your marriage, Focus on the Family has created a series of devotionals to address each issue and offer Bible-based tips for you and your spouse.


The Bible gives a few hints about life in ancient Israel. The story of Mary and Martha gives us a peek at some hectic dinner preparations. In the Parable of the Lost Coin, Jesus speaks of a woman cleaning her home. The Mosaic Law gives instructions on removing toxic mold from a house. Unfortunately, there are no commands about folding laundry or vacuuming. What’s a modern couple to do?

Scripture Reading

  • Philippians 2:4— “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”
  • Galatians 5:13 — “Through love serve one another.”
  • Matthew 23:11— “The greatest among you shall be your servant.”


Let’s be honest: Nobody likes chores. But how badly do married couples hate housecleaning? The referral site asked couples which household chores they hate the most and what they’d be willing to give up if it meant they’d never have to clean house again. The 2019 survey revealed the tasks couples hated most:

  • Washing dishes/Cleaning the kitchen
  • Laundry
  • Cleaning the bathroom
  • Sweeping/Vacuuming
  • Grocery shopping/Meal prep

How badly do couples hate household chores? Here’s what people would rather do than sweep and fold laundry:

  • Add an hour to their daily commute
  • Spend a week in jail
  • Give up their smartphone
  • Shave their head
  • Completely give up sex

Maybe there’s a better way to deal with housework and other shared responsibilities.

While there are no spiritual laws for vacuuming or Old Testament directions on how to fold clothing, the Bible has a few things to say about how couples should deal with the day-to-day drudgery of housework and chores. But it’s not easy advice.

In Matthew 23:11, Jesus set the standard: “The greatest among you shall be your servant.” And there’s more — Philippians 2:4 tells us to “look to the interests of others.” Galatians 5:3 tells us: “Through love serve one another.”

Simple words. Not-so-simple decisions. But imagine the difference it will make in your marriage when your spouse sees you serving him or her from a heart full of love.


Heavenly Father, it’s not easy to be a servant. Thank you for Jesus’ example. Fill my heart with love for my spouse so that I may serve them like Jesus served us. Amen.

Today’s Question

What household chore can you take over in order to serve your spouse?

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