In This Series:
- 1. In-Law Relationships
- 2. Myths and Realities of Extended Families
- 3. How Your Relationship with Your In-Laws Impacts Your Marriage
- 4. Getting Along With Your In-Laws
- 5. What if an In-Law Doesn't Accept Me?
- 6. What If an In-Law Tries to Run Our Lives?
- 7. Cutting Your Spouse's Apron Strings
- 8. Holidays and the In-Laws
- 9. Advice for an In-Law
- 10. Dr. Bill Maier on In-Laws
Since we no longer have a traditional rite of passage in which a young person officially enters adulthood, marriage often ends up serving that role by default. Sometimes, though, even marriage doesn’t trigger an appropriate emotional separation from a parent.
If parent and adult child are enmeshed in an unhealthy way, there can be runners of that vine throughout the marriage—gradually choking it to death. A prime example: the married daughter who still allowed her mother to balance her and her husband’s joint checking account!
It helps if both sets of parents give the new couple their blessing—thereby affirming the newlyweds’ independence. While this may seem unnecessary with today’s career-delayed first marriages and blended second or third marriages, it’s a valuable gift for any husband and wife.
If you believe an in-law is trying to run your life, consider how the following principles might help.