May 3, 2023
Addressing anxiety in your parenting can be difficult. But there are ways to practically and appropriately manage your anxiety and stress to serve and love your family well.
Anxiety is not easy to manage. It tends to spill into all aspects of the day. I love this question because you are recognizing the negative impact anxiety inside of you can have on others around you and on your ability to be present with them.
Stress, which is a given as a parent, can create an even more anxious response to a life that already feels somewhat out of control because of ongoing anxious feelings. Your goal will be to have a flexible mindset that considers multiple possible perspectives to moments and situations. Anxiety creates a rigid and inflexible mind that usually predicts the worst in order to avoid loss, pain, or embarrassment.
One of most common and popular bible verses about anxiety is Philippians 4:6. The Apostle Paul writes, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”
On its own, this verse can be discouraging to those who struggle with anxiety. It can read like we’re simply told to stop being anxious, pray instead, and all the worries will disappear. For anyone who struggling with anxiety, this can be a deflating message.
However, Paul’s thought continues beyond this verse: “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Paul encourages us towards peace that comes from God, not from ourselves or our world.
In other words, the ability stop being anxious is not something we can do because of ourselves. Instead, relief from anxiety and worry comes from a reliance on something outside of ourselves: letting go of control, using our discernment for guiding our family, and trusting God through untrustworthy feelings.
Parenting is messy. Anxiety plus parenting can be even messier. But trying to be the perfect parent isn’t the solution. Building a home founded on grace and gratitude can help transform the culture in your family. Challenge yourself to look for ways to be grateful for the small joys in parenting. Remember, your kids aren’t looking for you to be perfect. They want you to be present, interested in them, and effectively guiding them with grace and understanding.
Explore how you can approach anxiety in your parenting to be purposeful for your family and yourself.
Vice President, Parenting and Youth
Dr. Huerta oversees Focus’ initiatives that equip mothers and fathers with biblical and research based principles and guidance for raising healthy, resilient children rooted in a thriving faith in Christ.
Dr. Huerta is a bilingual psychologist, licensed clinical social worker, author of 7 Traits of Effective Parenting, and co-author of Focus on the Family’s Age and Stage resource, and various other resources. He is also the co-host and expert on the Focus on Parenting and the Practice Makes Parent podcasts.
For many years, he has provided families with practical, biblically-based, and research-based parenting advice on key parenting topics. He has been interviewed by various media outlets including Fox News, Fatherly, Christianity Today, WORLD Magazine, The Christian Post and CBN, and regularly speaks on Christian radio stations and podcasts across the United States. He’s also written for various publications and is a regular speaker at retreats, conventions, family camps, online events worldwide, and on various social media channels.
Dr. Huerta has maintained a private practice serving families in Colorado Springs since 2003 and has also served families as an employee of Focus on the Family since 2004.
He and his wife, Heather, love the outdoors, have been married since 1997, and love spending time with their two adult children.
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