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December 2, 2025
Enjoy family traditions or come up with activities that can become traditions to draw your family closer together during the Christmas season
Estimated reading time: 11 minutes
Christmas is a wonderful time to grow closer to family and friends. One way to do this is through enjoying family activities and traditions together. A tradition is anything that your family does each year. They might be passed down from ancestors or made up on the spur of the moment. Regardless, these activities are meant to help people of all ages enjoy each other and the season.
My husband and I put unbreakable ornaments on the tree when our kids were toddlers. We wanted the tree to be a symbol of the peace of Christ, so we made sure our interactions with the toddlers were peaceful. We didn’t block off the tree or scold our children to leave it alone.
When my daughter pulled off the little stuffed-bear ornaments multiple times, I smiled and put them back up again.
—Amber Bulk
We took advantage of the darkness one December evening and went outside with our children—ages 4, 14 and 16—for star viewing. My oldest shared his telescope with his siblings, who took turns searching for the brightest star.
We named the brightest star we found the Christmas Star, took turns admiring its beauty and talked about the star at Jesus’ birth. It was a peaceful Christmas moment as we huddled near one another, looking up in quiet awe.
—Carrie Nelson
One year I learned that even a Christmas gone awry is still a time for celebration. That year I tried to paint sets of peg dolls for my children for Christmas. Even though I worked into the wee hours night after night, I finished only eight of the 20 that I had planned to make.
I thought the kids would be disappointed, but they had a more exciting time watching me paint the remaining dolls. Remembering that experience has helped take the pressure off of having the perfect Christmas experience.
—Cassi Griesbach
I’ve always loved our Christmas traditions, but in the past, instead of using them as a framework for celebration, I used them to measure the value of Christmas — how perfect our family’s holiday looked to others. I realized that our traditions were for our benefit, not others. Ideally, they should build up family members, focus on what Jesus did or model His love.
So I took an inventory of our Christmas traditions to decide which ones to keep. As I did, I asked myself the following three questions:
—Catherine Grace
My husband and I give our Christmas presents in different ways each year. One year, we didn’t put them under the tree until the night before. Another, we used a coded number system on the gift tags. But then one Christmas we stopped because we thought our children were getting too old for these games.
That Christmas morning, I awoke to find our presents duct-taped to the walls and ceiling. Our son chose to continue our let’s-have-fun-with-the-presents tradition and worked on it in the middle of the night. His younger sisters thought it was hilarious.
—Danielle Pitzer
I love sharing a favorite Christmas tradition from my childhood with my own children — a neighborhood Nativity play.
Each year we invite the neighborhood kids to join us in dressing as Bible characters from the story of Christ’s birth: angels, animals, shepherds and kings. The oldest child narrates. Our annual production takes place in the front yard with an inflatable Nativity scene as the backdrop.
After the play, we celebrate with a birthday cake for Jesus and a brunch with all the kids’ families. I treasure sharing the Gospel with our children and neighbors.
—Jennifer Cook
Sally Lloyd-Jones, author of The Jesus Storybook Bible, encourages parents to allow their children to help decorate for the celebration of Christ’s birth.
“I love to involve children in the excitement of Jesus’ coming,” Sally says. “God’s people waited for Him, and in Advent we’re waiting, too. We’re getting ready for Him; we’re preparing our homes and our hearts for Him.”
Consider relating biblical symbolism and stories to items you use while decorating the tree. As you string the lights, you might remind your kids that Jesus is the Light of the World. The star on the top of the tree represents the star that led the wise men to where Jesus was born. Here are a few additional insights to share while decorating together:
—Andrea Gutierrez
As I stitched an angel design on a Christmas stocking for our newborn daughter, she slept peacefully in the bassinet. I wondered, “Would this stocking, filled with toys and goodies, diminish the meaning of Christmas?”
I prayed for guidance. My husband and I wanted to instill faith in our five children. We did not want our children to get caught up in material things. I grabbed my Bible, flipped the pages and started reading about Elizabeth and Zechariah. I read where Elizabeth’s unborn baby leapt in her womb as she greeted Mary, pregnant with Jesus, and my own heart leapt with an idea.
If I wanted God’s Holy Spirit to fill us, why not compare the filled stockings to how God fills our lives with good gifts? Months later, as Christmas approached, we prepared for a new tradition.
During Advent, we read about Elizabeth’s joy at the upcoming birth of Jesus. We shared with our children how we wanted them to be filled with joy and that we had a new surprise in store for that year.
On Christmas Day, holding our stockings filled with fruits and treasures, we gathered around the tree. We asked everyone to share how the surprises we had carefully chosen reminded them of God’s love and the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
Becky held up a watch and said, “Look, my watch tells time. God loves me all the time.”
James pulled a toy car out of his stocking and said, “God goes with me in our car.”
Sometimes we puzzled over how an item could help us think of God — especially when each child received the same gift. I remember laughing after the fourth banana was pulled from a stocking. Our creativity was definitely stretched on those. Yet the moments of laughter and sharing helped us keep God in our celebration.
Over the years, we kept the tradition, and as the children grew, the comments changed, adding more depth. Last Christmas we received a gift in return. Our daughter Darlene’s fiancée joined in our Christmas stocking tradition. Darlene exclaimed, “I can hardly wait until we have children and celebrate this custom with our own family.”
—Karen H. Whiting
My kids enjoyed our family’s Christmas traditions when they were younger, but as they reached their late tween years, these traditions no longer seemed quite as fun to them. My husband and I decided that it was time for a change because we wanted our children to enjoy celebrating Christ’s birth. We adjusted our traditions so our kids could take more responsibility and play a larger role in them.
New Christmas ornaments. Instead of buying ornaments for each child, I gave my kids a budget and let them purchase their own ornaments. Sometimes my kids spent weeks hunting for the perfect ornament that represented something from the past year.
Christmas cards and letters. Instead of picking one family photo for our Christmas card, I had my kids choose a few favorite photos from the past year. They also wrote their own section for the family letter. All with parental veto power, of course.
Christmas tree. Instead of an exclusive family trip to the Christmas tree lot, we let our kids invite friends to traipse along to choose our tree. Afterward, we hosted a decorating party that included hot chocolate and treats.
Gifts for the needy. Instead of choosing a Christmas service project for the family, my husband and I allowed our children to pick someone or an organization to bless, such as Samaritan’s Purse or The Salvation Army. They earned money doing odd jobs or recycling to pay for their personal project.
I knew that these traditions would need to be readjusted again as my kids grew older, but these small changes demonstrated that I recognized their growing maturity.
—Marian Fritzemeier
My family and I have always loved outdoor Christmas lights. Every December, we’d fill a thermos with hot chocolate, wrap ourselves in blankets, open the car windows and cruise through any wonderland of lights in our town.
Our own Christmas decorating story began modestly. The mission my wife, Dale, gave was simple: Drive to the store with our two boys, Mark and Brad. Return with two strands of outdoor Christmas lights. You’d think she would have learned her lesson after she sent us to buy flour and we returned with a four-person raft.
Once at the store, Brad whispered softly, lest other shoppers notice the great deal, “These only cost two bucks for 100 lights.”
“I guess we could get a few more,” I said.
Mark scooped lights off the shelf by the armful.
“ A few doesn’t mean all,” I said.
“But we can light up our whole house! Even the roof and all the trees,” Mark exclaimed.
“Plus, it would be fun,” Brad added.
Their logic was unassailable.
The result of all the lights on our house was so visually stunning that we scarcely noticed the sharp whine of the electric meter as it spun with the velocity of a buzz saw.
The first year we moved to our current home, when Brad was 10 and Mark was 12, we again put up our light display. By this time, we had enough wiring yardage to drape the windows, roof lines, chimney, garage, front fence, hedges, bushes, trees, and stray cats that walked through the yard.
Millie was a widow and lived in the house across the street. She rarely left her home, largely because she looked after an equally aging relative. She watched ministers on television and prayed in her home because she would not leave her relative unattended.
“Each year I look forward to seeing your lights,” Millie told Dale one day. “I can’t get out so much anymore, but I can look out my window and it makes my Christmas.”
In fact, it was our Christmas light display that sparked the friendship between Millie and Dale. One of Millie’s Christmas traditions was whipping up pounds of homemade candies, which she gave to friends and loved ones. One day, Dale brought in a tray from Millie.
“She made all this?” Mark looked wide-eyed at the fudge, maple glazed walnuts, peanut brittle, and a broad array of cookies.
“That must have been a ton of work,” Brad said as he reached for a treat.
As the boys grew, developing new hobbies, friends, and interests, our annual spectacle of lights dimmed. The boys and I hung lights, but fewer and sometimes just days before Christmas.
One year, Brad said, “Let’s just hang a couple of strands on the fence. It’s almost Christmas and we’ll just take them down in a week.”
I agreed.
But Dale led the charge of the light brigade. “Even if no one else sees them, the lights are important for Millie.”
Most of us won’t be touted in the media, won’t be in the spotlight, and won’t wield national power. Odds are, most of us will scarcely be noticed outside of our small circle of family and friends.
But Jesus said that God notices and rewards small acts of thoughtfulness done in His name, even giving a thirsty person a cup of cold water. So Brad and I got ladders and flashlights and trudged into the night. We put up our family’s dazzling display of Christmas lights—not because we wanted to or had to.
That year, we decorated for Millie.
—Dave Meurer
Familiar traditions can feel painful in the midst of grief. The loss of someone dear or another life-altering situation can cause the usual celebrations to feel overwhelming. These are the times to remember differently.
“Happy Thanksgiving!”
“Merry Christmas!”
“Happy New Year!”
As the end of the year approaches, everywhere we turn someone is telling us we should be happy.
But for families who’ve recently lost someone they love, handling the holidays can seem more like something to survive than to enjoy. The traditions and events that can add so much joy and meaning to the season are punctuated with painful, repeated reminders of our loss. Many of us wish we could find a quiet place to hide until January 2.
Since we likely can’t hide away, it makes sense to have a strategy to handle the holiday season. We need a plan that will help us get through what can be a very difficult time of year.
Our daughter, Hope, was born on a Monday before Thanksgiving. I thought we’d always be celebrating her birthday around that holiday. In a sense we do – but of course it’s not the way I thought it would be.
When that first Thanksgiving rolled around six months after Hope died, I was in the lowest part of my grief. I couldn’t bear to do a big family thing, fearing that perhaps no one would say her name or that I wouldn’t have space to just be sad. But we didn’t want to stay home in our quiet house and feel the gloom closing in, either.
So we drove to Asheville, N.C., stayed in a bed-and-breakfast, visited the Biltmore mansion and went to the movies.
We did have some fun, though our sadness came along for the ride. Still, we did our best to pursue joy and celebrate life together in new and different ways. The change of scenery lightened our load of sorrow.
Shortly before making the trip, I went by a friend’s house. She was one of those people who never seemed to really get our loss, and seemed to want me to hurry back to being happy.
When I told her about our plans, she said, “That should be fun.” The look she gave me said I was supposed to agree wholeheartedly with her.
“Yes, it should,” I said.
I didn’t know how to explain that when you’ve lost a member of your family, even the best of times are painfully incomplete. Someone is missing. Even the best days, the happiest events, are tinged with sadness.
How do you get a Christmas tree without Dad, when he always picked out the best one? Can a child find a gift for Dad without Mom there to help? How does a wife get through New Year’s Eve with no one to kiss at the stroke of midnight?
There are no simple answers, no easy ways to get through these important, memory-laden days. But there are a few things that can help bring back some joy amid the sadness. For the years when grief is an unavoidable companion, consider adjusting or trading traditions in a way that acknowledges that Immanuel is God with us in the good and the hard times.
This article is a compilation of articles written by various authors. The author names are found within the article.
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