I’ll never forget June 24, 2022. I know exactly where I was when I heard that the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. It was a day to celebrate.
But your teen may not think so. At the time, headlines like these appeared everywhere: “Abortion Is Healthcare,” “Women’s Rights Are Being Taken Away” and “Women Will Die Without Abortion!” But other headlines declared, “Life Wins: Supreme Court Issues Victory for Rule of Law” and “Roe Was Wrong the Day It Was Decided.”
Which headlines should our teens believe? What’s the truth about reproductive rights? And how can we have an honest conversation about pro-life issues with our teens?
Search for Honesty Together
Conversations in schools, on college campuses and on social media can challenge teens’ beliefs about abortion and leave them scrambling to find answers. Our first step as Christian parents is to help our teens discover what God has to say about pro-life issues.
Reading Psalm 139 with your teen is an excellent place to begin your search for the truth: “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret” (verses 13-15).
As you talk with your teen about this passage, highlight the value our loving Creator places on each and every person. You might say, “Can you imagine a God who loves you so much that He knit every part of you together? That same God cares deeply for each of us and wants the best for us. Every life is valuable and worthy of protection because God made us in His image” (Genesis 1:27).
Counteract Cultural Narratives
The Bible clearly tells us that every life has value, including the lives of preborn babies. But our culture often blurs this value, especially in its narrative about the reproductive rights of young women. Have you heard the slogan “My body, my choice”? This conveys to our teens that since their bodies belong to them, they have a right to terminate an unexpected pregnancy.
It’s our job as parents to help our teens understand the nature of personal rights so they can see why this view is wrong. Here’s a logical way to explain it.
If I want people out of my life, I can choose to confront them, ignore them, press charges or even file a restraining order. However,
I do not (and should not) have the right to take their lives.
Likewise, I have the right to make decisions about my own body, but I don’t have that right over someone else’s body, not even the body of a preborn baby. A more reasonable approach to “My body, my choice” is that you have the right to choose whether to sleep with someone, parent an unexpected child or arrange an adoption. But you don’t have the right to end a child’s life by having an abortion. Even if a preborn baby is growing inside your body, their body belongs to them, not you.
Counteracting this faulty and dangerous logic with truth can help our teens see these distortions more clearly.
Affirm Respect and Dignity
Our teens also need to know that when a woman goes to an abortion provider, she’s given information that leads to only one choice: abortion. But when a woman seeks out a life-affirming pregnancy center, she’s given information on parenting, adoption and abortion. Instead of providing abortion services or referrals, the pregnancy centers that Focus on the Family work with share all the benefits and risks associated with the different options.
We believe that when a woman is treated with respect and dignity and receives information that will help her make an educated choice, she will be empowered to advocate for herself and the life of her preborn child. Talk with your teen about the differences between abortion clinics and pregnancy centers so he or she understands the importance of respect, dignity and life.
Speak Up
The sole intent of an abortion is to produce a dead baby—that’s why it’s called a “failed abortion” when a baby survives. This may be difficult for our teens to hear, but they need to know the whole truth about their reproductive rights. As parents, we need to engage with them on this issue. So don’t be reticent or afraid to speak up. Start a conversation with your teens today, even if it’s uncomfortable. When they see life through God’s eyes, they’ll know which narrative is true so they can make the right choices.
MYTH: Abortion is needed because pregnancy can endanger women’s lives.
TRUTH: This message is used to create fear. The death of any pregnant mother is tragic, yet according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, there were only 22.3 pregnancy-related deaths per 100,000 people in the United States in 2022. That’s 0.02%. In life-threatening situations, such as an ectopic pregnancy, abortion is legal in all 50 states. In those instances, the intent is always to save the mother’s life, not to cause the death of her preborn child.
MYTH: Without abortion, unwanted children will end up in foster care.
TRUTH: Many children enter foster care because they’re victims of abuse or neglect, not because they’re unwanted. This is very personal to me. My husband and I raised our grandkids because my son and daughter-in-law were struggling with their own issues. I would never say that our grandkids were unwanted or that it was unfortunate they were born. I’m so blessed to have them in my life.
MYTH: The abortion pill makes an unexpected pregnancy go away.
TRUTH: Many people say the abortion pill (aka medical/chemical abortion) is as safe as taking aspirin. It’s not. The abortion pill is designed to cause a miscarriage. This means everything that happens to a woman’s body during a spontaneous miscarriage also occurs when she takes an abortion pill—assuming there are no complications. Learn more about what the abortion pill does at FocusOnTheFamily.com/AbortionPill.
MYTH: Children shouldn’t be raising children.
TRUTH: If a young woman has an unexpected pregnancy, she may feel unable to parent a child. That’s OK. Pregnancy resource centers can help her understand her options. And now that awareness is growing, many birth mothers are given choices. One solution is adoption. A young woman can decide who will adopt her child and whether she wants an open, semi-open or closed adoption. These are real choices. And if she’s undecided and is in a state that allows them, she can use a Safe Haven Baby Box. If you haven’t heard about this option, check out shbb.org.
Pro-Life Resources for Teens
- Find others who are asking questions about reproductive rights: FocusOnTheFamily.com/PerfectLove.
- Be a voice for life and follow us on social media: @i.am.prolife.
- Connect with other teens who are standing up for life: StudentsForLife.org/Learn.
- Find resources for a friend with an unexpected pregnancy: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/topic/pro-life/unplanned-pregnancy/.
- A Pro-Life Declaration for Kids and Teens.
- Roe Finally Did Go. Now, How Can Teens Have Conversations about Abortion and Pro-Life Topics?
- Teaching the Pro-Life Student
