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How to Be Intentional About Raising Christ Followers

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Rhett H. Wilson gives parents five ways to guide kids to become devoted Christ-followers.

Fans expected the American women’s team to win the 4×100 relay in the 2004 Summer Olympics. But when Marion Jones finished the second leg, she could not successfully hand off the baton in the exchange zone to Lauryn Williams, the third racer. This caused the fastest team at the Olympic Games to be disqualified from the prize.

When it comes to matters of faith, most Christian parents do their best to successfully “pass the baton.” Others, who have run the race of faith before me, successfully passed it on to me. Their lives and walks of integrity challenged me to embrace Christ and follow Him. As a parent, I deeply desired to not only run the race well but to transfer the baton of discipleship to my children. Here are five ways I chose to mold my teens to become devoted Christ-followers:

Role models

The Bible says, “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm” (Proverbs 13:20). As parents, we can encourage our children to attend church and help them find good role models to follow, because teens need to see adults who are living with integrity, practicing spiritual disciplines and walking day to day with Jesus.

When my son Hendrix turned 13, I asked five men to join us for supper one evening. The men already knew him well. Each man exhibited a faithful walk with God and gave evidence of an authentic Christian walk. I could point my son to them and say, “That man is following Christ.” At supper, each one exhorted Hendrix briefly and shared a Bible verse, challenging him to become a man who loves, obeys and follows Jesus. After supper, every man prayed for Hendrix, for his next step into young manhood.

Another way to expose our kids to godly role models is by reading biographies of notable Christians. For years our family has read stories about Christian missionaries, inventors, explorers, politicians and pastors. History provides wise and godly role models for our children to follow instead of the immaturity and irreverence modeled by many pop-culture icons.

Responsibility

Parents make the majority of the decisions for their children, and my wife and I were no different. But for young men and women to grow in wisdom and discernment, they need to practice decision-making. Ultimately, our children will be responsible to the Lord — not us. That’s why it was important for my wife and I to slowly transfer the responsibility of decisions to our teens.

Accountability

Shifting the burden of accountability from parents to the Lord prepares our teens to be more successful in living their own lives. I began teaching my children to be accountable to God by giving the reasons why we’re supposed to do things.

  • Why tell the truth? Because God is truthful, and He made life to work the best when we model truth-telling.
  • Why practice sexual purity? Because God’s essence is pure. He created sex for marriage, and He wants us to enjoy it in the context of a godly covenant.
  • Why guard what goes into our minds and bodies? Because we are God’s temple. Our minds and spirits operate best when the temple is free from pollutants.

Prayer

Jesus said, “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5). As my children became teenagers, I emphasized one simple truth: You cannot live a godly life apart from Christ’s indwelling power and presence. They needed to know how to talk with God daily and how to draw strength from Him for life’s challenges. One day I may not be there to step in and help. But God will always be available to them.

God’s Word

Teenagers need to learn the necessity of regular Bible intake, which can be done through reading, hearing the Word and meditating on Scripture. I found Bible reading to be an invaluable part of the faith journey in the lives of my children. If I help my children develop a habit of reading the Bible, I am not just giving them a sermon but teaching them to go to God with their concerns and questions.

The handoff between faith runners must take place so the next generation can start its leg of the journey.

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There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.

There Is Still Hope for Your Marriage

You may feel that there is no hope for your marriage and the hurt is too deep to restore the relationship and love that you once had. The truth is, your life and marriage can be better and stronger than it was before. In fact, thousands of marriages, situations as complex and painful as yours, have been transformed with the help of professionals who understand where you are right now and care deeply about you and your spouse’s future. You can restore and rebuild your marriage through a personalized, faith-based, intimate program called, Hope Restored.
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Understand How to Respect and Love your Son Well

Why doesn’t my son listen to me? Have you ever asked that question? The truth is, how you see your son and talk to him has a significant effect on how he thinks and acts. That’s why we want to help you. In fact, we’ve created a free five-part video series called “Recognizing Your Son’s Need for Respect” that will help you understand how showing respect, rather than shaming and badgering, will serve to motivate and guide your son.

Reconnected: The Digital Experience

Is the love there, but not the spark? Reawaken fun in your marriage and move from roommates to soulmates again with the help of this 7-part online video experience. Learn how to connect emotionally and spiritually as husband and wife using techniques such as dreaming together and establishing deep, heartfelt communication. The Digital Experience includes 7 teaching videos, an online study guide and access to additional tools and resources to help spouses reconnect.

Next Steps: Marriage Assessment

We want your marriage to be thriving and healthy. Take the free Marriage Assessment from Focus on the Family to learn how to strengthen your bond with your spouse and get the tools to help you need to grow closer together. 

Next Steps: Fruit of the Spirit Devotionals for Couples

The Fruit of the Spirit Devotional is a free series of nine short videos to get you into God’s Word and inspire you to seek the Holy Spirit’s help in loving your spouse.

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