Age-Appropriate Chores:
How to Help Kids Be Responsible

Dirty dishes. Messy bedrooms. Toys on the living room floor. Some days, there just isn’t a good way to avoid the chore wars. But there is always tomorrow, and you can be proactive. Ask yourself, What chores are important for my children to learn, and what are they capable of doing? Then, check out this list of age-appropriate chores for kids will help you to discover the answers to those questions.

Baby/Toddler

0 to 3 Years Old

Preschool/Primary

4 to 8 Years Old

Preteen/Tween

9 to 12 Years Old

Teenagers

13 to 18 Years Old

As you view this list of chores for kids by age, remember that every child matures at a different pace. Adjust the chores you select for your kids to what you know about your children’s skills and talents. Realize that no child should do all of the chores listed below every day. Remember the importance of recognizing the difference between a chore (an ongoing task that benefits the household) and a life skill (an activity that children should know how to do before living on their own, such as handling money).

The following list of age-appropriate chores is only meant as a guide and reflects the types of chores that many children in specific age ranges are capable of completing. And we’ve included resources from some of these chores that offer hands-on, practical ways to train your children to do them. Hopefully, approaching chores for kids in a thoughtful and intentional way will help your children succeed in personal and family responsibility:

Personal Chores

Family Chores

T ake their dirty laundry to the laundry basket
Fill a pet’s water and food bowls (with supervision)
Help a parent clean up spills and dirt
Dust

The 7 Traits of Effective Parenting and Chores for Kids

Adaptability

You will need to have psychological flexibility to be content with imperfections as your children learn to manage daily responsibilities.

Boundaries

You get to set up structure in your home as your children learn to work and enjoy work. Interestingly, a commitment to consistently doing chores and navigating responsibility together yields peace and connectedness for your whole family.

Avoiding the Chore War With Your Kids

Our guests offer parents practical advice on teaching children responsibility by giving them age-appropriate chores.

Personal Chores

Set out clothes for the next day
Make their bed with minimal parental help
Bring their things from the car to the house
Pick up their toys
Make their bed every day
Write thank you notes with supervision

Family Chores

Set the table with supervision
Clear the table with supervision
Help a parent carry in the lighter groceries
Sort clothes and towels for the laundry
Match socks after clothing is washed
Dust with supervision
Hang up towels in the bathroom
Clean their room with supervision
Be responsible for a pet’s food, water and exercise
Vacuum individual rooms
Dust individual rooms
Fold laundry with supervision
Put their laundry in their drawers and closets
Put away dishes from the dishwasher
Clean their room with supervision
Empty indoor trash cans

The 7 Traits of Effective Parenting and Chores for Kids

Grace and Forgiveness

Your children will most likely argue and imperfectly complete their chores. You can bridge these moments of failure by communicating and extending grace and forgiveness along the way. As you model this, you ease the tension that can come from chores.

Gratitude

Through a proper view of gratitude, you and your family can achieve a healthy perspective of chores. When you value gratitude, you bring a heart of service, a flexible mind, and a calming presence. Through your example, your kids have a better chance of cultivating gratitude in their own perspectives.

Chore Chart for Young Kids

Compensating Kids for Chores

Is it appropriate to pay our school-aged children for doing household tasks? When I was growing up I always received an allowance, but my spouse says that kids need to work without being paid because that's part of being a family. What do you think?

Family Q&A

Personal Chores

Keep bedroom clean
Be responsible for homework
Write invitations and thank you notes
Change bed sheets
Keep their rooms tidy and do a biannual deep cleaning

Family Chores

Wash dishes
Wash the family car with supervision
Prepare a few easy meals on their own
Clean the bathroom with supervision
Rake leaves
Learn to use the washer and dryer
Put all laundry away with supervision
Take the trash can to the curb for pick up
Change light bulbs
Dust, vacuum, clean bathrooms and do dishes
Clean mirrors
Mow the lawn with supervision
Baby-sit or nanny

The 7 Traits of Effective Parenting and Chores for Kids

Respect

You get to set the tone for respect as a core ingredient to serving through chores. Chores are about respecting others and your family’s space. Ask yourself: do you model bringing life-giving words and life-giving actions to your home? Encourage one another as you conquer a home that naturally goes into chaos and disorder when everyone has so many competing demands and distractions.

Chore Chart for Tweens

Personal Chores

Responsible for all personal chores for ages 9 to 12
Earn spending money
Purchase their own clothes
Maintain any car they drive (e.g., gas, oil changes, tire pressure, etc.)

Family Chores

Do assigned housework without prompting
Do yard work as needed
Baby sit
Prepare food — from making a grocery list and buying the items (with supervision) to serving a meal — occasionally
Wash windows with supervision
Do housework as needed
Do yard work as needed
Prepare family meals — from grocery list to serving it — as needed
Deep cleaning of household appliances, such as defrosting the freezer, as needed

The 7 Traits of Effective Parenting and Chores for Kids

Intentionality

As parents, you set up opportunities for your kids to serve and mature. Chores require guidance, follow through, and organization. You can help shape your child’s heart toward humility and responsibility, regardless of their personality. Some kids will be more difficult than others, but you can set up daily and weekly chores that are opportunities to serve one another.

Love

When there are emotional outbursts and tantrums, that’s when your children need your “A” game love. This is an opportunity to love your children by adapting to their interpretations or frustrations so you can guide their understanding of responsibility.

Dealing With Lazy Teenagers

How can I motivate my two lazy teenagers? They won't help me around the house, and they consistently wait until the last minute to do their homework. As a single parent, I usually don't have the energy to make them get down to work. Is there a way to break this negative pattern?

Family Q&A

About the Author

Sheila Seifert

Sheila Seifert is the editorial director of Brio and Focus on the Family magazine, the author of over 20 books and the founder of Simple Literature.

More by Sheila Seifert

Age-Appropriate Chores: How to Help Kids Be Responsible

Contents

Personal Chores

Family Chores

Adaptability

Boundaries

Avoiding the Chore War With Your Kids

Personal Chores

Family Chores

Grace and Forgiveness

Gratitude

Chore Chart for Young Kids

Compensating Kids for Chores

Personal Chores

Family Chores

Respect

Chore Chart for Tweens

Personal Chores

Family Chores

Intentionality

Love

Dealing With Lazy Teenagers

About the Author

Sheila Seifert

Age-Appropriate Chores:
How to Help Kids Be Responsible