Three Daughters and a Dad

By Elsa Kok Colopy
Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email
Pascal Campion

Take steps to keep communication with your kids open and honest.

My daughter sat behind a closed bedroom door, fuming at my insensitivity. I replayed our conversation in my mind. The greeting: normal. The talk of school: inconsequential. The boy thing: What was it I said about the new crush in her world? Something about her being too young.

God, I prayed, please help me. I think I may have said something wrong . . . again. This scenario was not new to me. As a single dad of three girls, I spent a fair amount of time outside closed bedroom doors with a baffled look on my face. My single-parenting journey began when I was granted primary custody of my girls, then 6, 8 and 9. Thankfully, their mother stayed involved, calling regularly and initiating visits, but she lived out of state. So when it came to the day-to-day tasks of raising our children, I was the man on deck.

As my girls started into the tween and teen years, I found myself even more humbled by the weight of this responsibility. It became my goal to reduce closed-bedroom-door incidents and do my best to engage in their world. I made my share of mistakes, but I also did a few things that opened the door to their hearts. If you’re a single dad with daughters, you may want to consider these tips:

Be affectionate

Daughters need to feel your love. Whether it’s a warm hug, words of affirmation or some cuddle time, displays of affection communicate care to their hearts.

Be teachable

Do all you can to learn how to guide and influence your children. Don’t try to go it alone. Consider having a panel of women in your corner — moms, sisters, friends — who can help you understand the emotions and changes your daughters may be experiencing.

Be faithful

One of the best ways you can influence your daughters is to be diligent in your faith journey. As you grow in your relationship with God and in your dependency on prayer, your daughters will benefit. And they will learn to live what you model.

As a dad, you have the incredible opportunity to shape future godly women. These girls will someday become wives, moms and bright lights shining in a dark world. Don’t lose sight of that vision, no matter what closed door might stand in your way.

Copyright © 2012 by Elsa Kok Colopy. Used by permission.

Share on facebook
Share on twitter
Share on pinterest
Share on print
Share on email

You May Also Like

Thank you [field id="first_name"] for signing up to get the free downloads of the Marrying Well Guides. 

Click the image below to access your guide and learn about the counter-cultural, biblical concepts of intentionality, purity, community and Christian compatibility.

(For best results use IE 8 or higher, Firefox, Chrome or Safari)

To stay up-to-date with the latest from Boundless, sign up for our free weekly e-newsletter.

If you have any comments or questions about the information included in the Guide, please send them to [email protected]

Click here to return to Boundless

Focus on the Family

Thank you for submitting this form. You will hear from us soon. 

The Daily Citizen

The Daily Citizen from Focus on the Family exists to be your most trustworthy news source. Our team of analysts is devoted to giving you timely and relevant analysis of current events and cultural trends – all from a biblical worldview – so that you can be inspired and assured that the information you share with others comes from a reliable source.

Alive to Thrive is a biblical guide to preventing teen suicide. Anyone who interacts with teens can learn how to help prevent suicidal thinking through sound practical and clinical advice, and more importantly, biblical principles that will provide a young person with hope in Christ.

Bring Your Bible to School Day Logo Lockup with the Words Beneath

Every year on Bring Your Bible to School Day, students across the nation celebrate religious freedom and share God’s love with their friends. This event is designed to empower students to express their belief in the truth of God’s Word–and to do so in a respectful way that demonstrates the love of Christ.

Focus on the Family’s® Foster Care and Adoption program focuses on two main areas:

  • Wait No More events, which educate and empower families to help waiting kids in foster care

  • Post-placement resources for foster and adoptive families

Christian Counselors Network

Find Christian Counselors, Marriage & Family Therapists, Psychologists, Social Workers and Psychiatrists near you! Search by location, name or specialty to find professionals in Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselors Network who are eager to assist you.

Boundless is a Focus on the Family community for Christian young adults who want to pursue faith, relationships and adulthood with confidence and joy.

Through reviews, articles and discussions, Plugged In exists to shine a light on the world of popular entertainment while giving you and your family the essential tools you need to understand, navigate and impact the culture in which we live.

Have you been looking for a way to build your child’s faith in a fun and exciting way?
Adventures in Odyssey® audio dramas will do just that. Through original audio stories brought to life by actors who make you feel like part of the experience; these fictional, character-building dramas use storytelling to teach lasting truths.

Focus on the Family’s Hope Restored all-inclusive intensives offer marriage counseling for couples who are facing an extreme crisis in their marriage, and who may even feel they are headed for divorce.