September 8, 2021

Pro-Life Hypocrisy: Slay Your Inner Hypocrite

“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.”

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

Pro-Life Hypocrisy

“Pro-Life Hypocrisy” might have been a term created to slander the pro-life movement, but it doesn’t mean pro-lifers, even pro-life Christians, are safe from practicing hypocrisy.

Sometimes, like all humans, we act selfishly for personal gain. Other times, we make poor judgments based on limited knowledge. We can let petty distractions (anger, fear, pride, offense, arrogance) dictate our words and actions. For this reason, being able to check ourselves and our motives against the ultimate goal of the pro-life movement is a vital practice for any pro-life advocate.

The beginning and end of every passionate pro-life effort should be surrounded with love and deep respect for every human life, preborn or otherwise.

A march for life sign saying "America's great pandemic abortion"

“America’s Great Pandemic Abortion” | Photo taken at the March for Life 2021

Slaying the Inner Hypocrite

Taking an honest look at ourselves can be a harrowing quest. So, as we dive into pro-life hypocrisy, let’s do so with the bravery of one of our favorite literary heroes — hobbits, as found in several of J.R.R. Tolkien’s most popular works like The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings.

People, in general, are like hobbits. We enjoy the comfort of home, the solace of familiar things. We’re relatively simple creatures, some of us more harry-footed than others, but most of us are also braver than we think. We may shy away from a dragon-slaying adventure, like hobbits, but as Bilbo and Frodo bravely left the shire, we too can make the choice to venture beyond our comfort zones.

Greedy Smaug, the dragon, has taken residence in our hearts. Ousting Smaug, self-proclaimed “King Under the Mountain,” will be the adventure of a lifetime with rewards greater than silver and gold. But we can’t defeat a dragon if we’re too afraid to look at him.

Begin Your Journey

Prologue

What Does Real Pro-Life Hypocrisy Look Like?

“There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something. You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after.” 

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

Pro-life People vs Pro-life Politics

A quick Google search reveals that pro-abortion activists have extensive lists of ways they believe pro-life advocates are hypocritical. Oddly, items in this list are either blatantly false claims about most pro-lifers or have a lot to do with political bias. Often, they point to the far extremes of questionable pro-life efforts while assuming that all pro-lifers are Republicans.

The value of a human is not dependent on a political party or presidential candidate. For this reason, when discussing pro-life hypocrisy, we’ll distance ourselves from any discussion of “left” or “right” beliefs. 

If you are human, you are worthy of basic human rights; agreeing with that statement is not reserved for Republicans. There are many Democrats and Independents who hold “pro-life for the whole-life” values.

Abortion is not a Republican vs Democrat issue. In the same sense, abortion is not a Science vs Bible issue. Many non-Christians are pro-life (Secular pro-life). Agreeing with scientific evidence on when life begins isn’t reserved for the religious. Similarly, one does not have to be born on American soil to believe in the “unalienable rights” outlined by the United States’s foundational documents. 

pro-life hypocrisy democrat for life stands with a pro-life sign

A member of the DFLA (Democrats for Life of America), attends the 2021 March for Life in Washington, D.C.

Abortion is not a head issue but a heart issue, a complex debate of compassion for both mother and baby. For this reason, political squabbles have done little to combat the common root causes of abortion: poverty, hopelessness and misinformation. And this leads us to our first real pro-life hypocrisy.

Chapter One

Pro-Life Hypocrisy #1: Politics Over People

“’Escaping goblins to be caught by wolves!’ he said, and it became a proverb, though we now say ‘out of the frying-pan into the fire’ in the same sort of uncomfortable situations.”

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

Pro-Life Hypocrisy of Politics Over People

There are several occurrences of the pro-life movement using a recovering person to make political points. For example, it is well argued that, at various stages of her life, Norma McCorvey (a.k.a Jane Roe of Roe v. Wade) was extorted by both pro-choice and pro-life institutions.

For some people, stepping out of recovery and into the church or pro-life community can feel like what Bilbo Baggins describes in The Hobbit as “escaping goblins only to be captured by wolves.”

Being passionate about being pro-life is great! Undoubtedly, having a story in your pocket that proves your arguing point is tempting to use. However, attached to that story is a human being. They also have inherent value and deserve to be treated just as humanely as preborn babies.

Examples of Hypocrisy #1

  1. A post uses a picture of a unique person (usually someone with a visible disability) for arguing points rather than celebrating or defending that person’s life and voice.
  2. A heated Facebook post turns the shortcomings of public figures who have mental health issues or previous abortions into a public example.
  3. The sadness of a woman with an abortion in her past is met with, “Well, that’s what you get…”

See Life 2021, Episode 1 | A roundtable of everyday heroes covers the basic facts of life and being pro-life.

How To Respond

We can catch moments where we fall short of valuing all life by asking ourselves these questions:

  • Am I treating the person as if they are the injustice?
  • By sharing this, will the person involved be ridiculed, hurt or attacked?
  • Do I care more about the social rewards I receive for sharing this (likes, comments, shares, verbal affirmations) more than I care for the person the information is about?

If we answer “yes,” to any of these questions, then there’s a chance we might be on the verge of committing pro-life hypocrisy. 

Chapter Two

Pro-Life Hypocrisy #2: Pro-Birth and Anti-Woman

“Where there’s life there’s hope.”

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

It was Mother Teresa, a renowned pro-life advocate, who said, “Abortion is profoundly anti-women. Three-quarters of its victims are women: half the babies and all the mothers.”

Mother Teresa was right. All the same, being pro-birth is also anti-women, and can be severely detrimental to birth moms, women facing an abortion decision and their preborn children.

Pro-Birth

Leah Outten, who chose to place her child in an open adoption at age sixteen, recalls the fears and pains associated with her choice. “The birth mothers I know died to themselves the day they signed their rights away. … They surrendered their desires to do what they felt was best for their child. Adoption rips a hole in our hearts that we live with every day.”

The courageous birth mother is just as valuable, worthy and important as her preborn child. If we don’t advocate for her just as passionately as we advocate for her preborn child, then we’re either pro-adoption or pro-birth. Neither, on its own, serves the woman with the unexpected pregnancy.

Being pro-birth can manifest in other ways as well. Most of us would firmly oppose the selective abortion of babies with Down syndrome. But do we celebrate those with Down syndrome beyond the womb and the adorable baby stages? Do we treat them as equals, advocating for them in school and the workplace?

Examples of Being Pro-Birth

  1. A pro-life church holds a pro-life fundraiser but removes the wheelchair ramp to make room for more parking spaces.
  2. Church members pressure a pregnant teen to choose adoption but offer no post-adoption support to her after her decision.
  3. A church offers no practical support to a family who adopts a child with special needs, dismissing the family as having a “special calling.”  

See Life 2021, Episode 2 | A roundtable of pro-life experts discuss the power of being authentically, pro-life. 

Anti-Woman

Few people in the pro-life moment would say, “I’m anti-woman.” Nevertheless, there are plenty of pro-lifers who don’t realize their words and actions are exceedingly anti-woman. This form of pro-life hypocrisy usually comes in the form of pregnancy shaming.

Things like sex, femininity and pregnancy should be celebrated! Sex is best inside the covenant of marriage. Even so, the process and product that follows — both new life and motherhood — is something miraculous and worth treating with respect and reverence. It is also important to remember that, often, we don’t know the full conditions of an unexpected pregnancy.

Examples of Being Anti-Woman

  1. When a young girl confesses she’s been sexually assaulted, those she confide in ask, “What did you do (to deserve it)?”
  2. A protestor responds to unexpected pregnancy by blaming the woman’s life choices.
  3. Teachers and coaches instruct women students that early pregnancy may cost them their scholarship.

The See Life 2021 roundtable discusses the importance of serving women facing an abortion decision.

How To Respond

The simplest way to identify this pro-life hypocrisy is to ask ourselves these three questions:

  • Is this loving?
  • Do my actions help build a world where those I defend can thrive?
  • Do my actions toward this person reflect the heart that God has for that person? (Romans 5:7-8)

When our words and actions toward those in need are loving, we create an environment for the weary to find hope and rest (Matthew 11:28-29).

"Pregnancy itself is not a sin."

Sonya, See Life 2021
Chapter Three

Pro-Life Hypocrisy #3: Dehumanizing Language

This thing all things devours:
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

A Pro-Life Hypocrisy Given Time

What if a stranger had the power to define your worth simply by their choice of words? This ability might seem like dark sorcery, conjured up by the imagination of J.R.R. Tolkien, but this is a superpower we all carry (Proverbs 18:21). Given time, the use of improper language can reinforce the ideas that some lives are less human or of less value than others. Usually, these phrases displace the humanity of a person and replace it with condition-first or condemning language.

Examples of Hypocrisy #3

  1. A person is identified by a disability or circumstance (e.g. “her rape baby,”  “that Downs guy”).
  2. A church-goer refers to a woman who has had an abortion as a murderer.
  3. All kids in foster care are referred to as, “orphans” or are labeled “foster kids” rather than just, “kids.”

See Life 2021 guests with unique conditions and circumstances discuss human value.

How To Respond

To beat this pro-life hypocrisy, choose to speak words that celebrate the life of the person, rather than focusing on their circumstance or condition:

  • Do I respond negatively to unexpected pregnancy (saying I’m sorry, rather than congratulations)?
  • When discussing pro-life issues, do I call women murderers?
  • Do I identify people by their condition rather than their name?

The Office of Disability Rights has a helpful list of affirmative language. However, this list may not be correct for some communities (such as the Deaf and Autistic communities who prefer otherwise). If possible, it’s best to get to know each person or community and then be considerate of their individual preferences.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Philippians 4:8
Chapter Four

Pro-life Hypocrisy #4: Inhumane Treatment of Deceased Children

“Farewell! O Gandalf! May you ever appear where you are most needed and least expected!” 

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

Intention Matters

A few years ago, a popular YouTuber committed the unthinkable. He and his group of friends visited Aokigahara, Japan’s famous “suicide forest.” This dense forest received its name for its dark history. To date, the forest has been the location of hundreds of suicides. Because of the frequent tendency for bodies to be discovered throughout the forest, signs line all the walkways warning visitors not to stray from the main path.

The YouTuber and his friends trekked far from the designated path. Not only did the YouTuber encounter a man who had been hanged, but he also filmed the scene and uploaded it to his channel. The video went viral, racking up millions of views, likes, dislikes and comments. Naturally, many viewers were disgusted and outraged. Eventually, YouTube pulled the video from their platform, apologizing to their viewers.

Dignity After Death

Why was everyone so upset? After all, the video contained the YouTuber talking about the tragedy of suicide. He also said he felt terrible for the victim and his family. Wasn’t that enough?

We treat the bodies of the deceased with reverence for several reasons. Firstly, we recognize their body as having been a vessel for something sacred — their life.

Secondly, we realize that their life, like all lives, carried weight and impact. Out of consideration for those who care about the deceased, we treat the body with dignity, even long after their death.

Pam Vredevelt describes the incredible pain & grief she and her husband experienced in losing two children.

The Hypocrisy In Practice

Plenty of pro-lifers are disgusted at undercover videos of Planned Parenthood reps brokering aborted baby parts. However, less prominent is the outrage towards fellow pro-lifers who use graphic images of aborted babies as a platform to push anti-abortion messages.

If we believe the preborn are valuable human beings, why do we parade their remains publicly? 

“But the world needs to know the truth about abortion!” one might say. True. The world should know the tragedy of abortion just as much as they do the tragedy of suicide. However, treating the deceased inhumanely is a dangerous way to go about it. 

Brutally honest photos, in the right context, can be beneficial to defending life and seeking justice. For example, in 1955, Emmett Till, a 14-year-old African American, was murdered for interacting with a white woman. It is said that the gruesome photos of his open-casket funeral helped inspire Rosa Parks to take her stand on the Montgomery city bus.

No doubt, had pictures of fetal remains been present at the time of Roe v Wade, the case might have been ruled differently. However, there is a fine and precarious line between using the two-edged sword of truth as a scalpel or a cleaver.

Consider the Whole-Life Impact

According to Guttmacher Institute, nearly one in four women will have had an abortion by the time she is forty-five years old. At large pro-life events, such as the March for Life in Washington D.C., attendance can reach around half a million people, most of them women. 

While covering the event, our pro-life team counted several 6ft images of decapitated and dismembered preborn children. Smaller signs of the same photos were even more plentiful.

The beginning of being authentically pro-life is practicing genuine whole-life values. This means women, both those who chose life and those who don’t, must matter just as much as their children.

A marcher at the March for Life 2021 holds a sign that says, “I regret my abortion.”

How To Respond

When faced with the decision of whether or not to share sensitive material, we can be more confident that we are avoiding pro-life hypocrisy if we can answer “yes” to these three questions:

  • Have I accounted for how this material will impact those recovering from an abortion decision?
  • Have I prepared a pro-love response to those who are triggered by this material?
  • Do I share this truth in hope that it brings healing and freedom (John 8:32)?

Ultimately, since we’re pro-life for the whole life, we should never forget that many pro-choicers are pro-choice because an abortion decision has impacted them or someone they know. It was a former director of Planned Parenthood, turned passionate pro-life advocate, who said it best:

"Those who speak out against life are people who are hurting. We pray for them to find truth, because we want them to know peace." 

Abby Johnson
Chapter Five

Pro-Life Hypocrisy #5: Pro-Christian, Anti-Jesus

“‘You have nice manners for a thief and a liar,’ said the dragon.”

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit, or There and Back Again

Pro-Christian, Anti-Jesus

We’ve finally reached the lair of Smaug the dragon. Now, it’s time to discuss the worst pro-life hypocrisy of all.

Imagine if Jesus walked up to the woman at the well and said, “Honey, you’re forgiven, but you better skedaddle before the disciples get here. Wouldn’t want your behavior ‘rubbing off’ on them.”

It’s unthinkable, isn’t it? Our compassionate savior, dismissing someone for their past behavior. Our thoughts on interacting with others should be the same. Revoking hope, forgiveness and love from someone because of their past choices should be unthinkable!

But I’ve never done that. We may think, at first. Hopefully we’re right, but then again, we’re human. A reliable sign, foretelling the coming of this pro-life hypocrisy is this sneakily prideful thought:

“If I respond lovingly, it’ll reinforce sinful behavior.”

The See Life 2021 roundtable discusses how families can get involved in helping save lives.

Graciously and lovingly meeting the needs of others doesn’t reinforce “sinful” behavior. On the contrary, it introduces Jesus to those who may not know him, but need him most.

Examples of Hypocrisy #3

  1. Parents forbid their kids from hanging around their pregnant friend for fear her behavior might, “rub off” on them.
  2. A youth group claims to be pro-life, but no one wants to hang around “the pregnant girl.”
  3. Anti-abortion sermons are delivered with dehumanizing language and without consideration that 1 out of 4 women in the church have had an abortion.

How To Respond

This hypocrisy is best avoided by our being able to answer “yes” to these brave questions:

  • Do my actions line up with my words?
  • Am I exhibiting the amount of grace I would want extended to me in that same situation?
  • Am I demonstrating the heart of Christ as outlined by the Apostle Paul in Romans 12:10-12?

There’s a reason why pro-lifers who work in the trenches refer to the pro-life movement as being #prolove. When we hear of an unexpected pregnancy, we should let our words and actions reflect the mission of Jesus as summarized in Mark 10:45

Abby Johnson lays roses on supreme court steps in honor of the those lost to aboriton.

Abby Johnson places a rose at the March for Life, in remembrance of those impacted by abortion.

"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

Mark 10:45

About the Author

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Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

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Headshot image of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Patti Giebink

Mrs. Patti Giebink

Dr. Patti Giebink is an OB-GYN who serves on the board of the Alpha Center, a well-known pregnancy center located in Sioux Falls, S.D. She also travels intermittently to work in mission hospitals in Pakistan and other countries. After completing her medical training, Dr. Giebink worked for Planned Parenthood from 1995-1997, during which she was the only abortion-provider in the state of South Dakota. She eventually experienced a radical change of heart on the issue of abortion after receiving God’s grace, forgiveness, and love, and she is now a passionate advocate for the pro-life movement.

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Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!

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Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

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Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. Randy Schroeder

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Tim and Noreen Muehlhoff Cropped

Dr. Tim and Mrs. Noreen Muehlhoff

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With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Reigniting Your Passion for Jesus - Part 2

For those of faith whose passion has waned over time, Kim Meeder will reinspire you in your relationship with Jesus Christ as she tells powerful, true stories about God that will spark renewed joy in your heart and encourage you to share the Gospel with others.

Headshot photo of author Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder

Kim Meeder and her husband, Troy, are the co-founders of Crystal Peaks Youth Ranch, a non-profit organization in Bend, Oregon, that rescues abused horses and pairs them with hurting kids for mutual healing. Kim is a popular motivational speaker and the author of a half dozen books including Hope Rising and Bridge Called Hope, which feature inspirational stories from her ranch.

Revival Rising

With enthusiasm that will set ablaze your passion to reach the hurting, Kim Meeder encourages you to let the holy fire of God’s presence fill your heart, soul, mind and strength. As your fear and pride melt away, those around you who are losing their battle for hope will be transformed by encountering His redeeming love in you. This–this is revival rising.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 2

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage - Part 2

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 2

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Embracing Your Role as a Spouse

As a spouse, you have three roles to play—a friend, a partner, and a lover. On this one-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Pastor Kevin A. Thompson explores those different roles and challenges you to live them out by investing emotionally, physically, and mentally in your relationship. As friends, he suggests we learn to play and laugh together. As partners, he equips us with solid ways to handle conflict and communication. As lovers, he offers some thoughts on how to bring back the sizzle. He shares five keys to saving your marriage: humility, respect, mercy, communication, and resilience. You’ll be encouraged to intentionally invest in your marriage.

Headshot of Kevin Thompson

Pastor Kevin Thompson

Kevin A. Thompson (MDiv, Beeson Divinity School) is lead pastor at Community Bible Church, a growing multi-site church with four locations in western Arkansas. Every year he meets with nearly one hundred couples with a range of needs, from pre-marital counseling to navigating the most serious betrayals. A marriage and parenting conference speaker, he and his wife, Jenny, have two children and live in Fort Smith, Arkansas. He blogs at kevinathompson.com.

Cover image of Kevin Thompson's book "Friends, Partners & Lovers"

Friends, Partners, and Lovers: What It Takes to Make Your Marriage Work

With engaging stories and clear, simple language, pastor Kevin Thompson shows how to live out three distinct roles in marraige. Using solid biblical principles, he helps you and your spouse grow your friendship, be supportive partners through the good times and the bad, and develop a healthy and satisfying sex life.

Sharing Your Faith with Grace and Purpose

You can confidently and lovingly share your faith—you just need to learn some new tactics to do so! In this Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast, apologist Greg Koukl outlines the “Columbo” tactic of asking questions, the “self-defeating argument” tactic to find holes in your opponent’s arguments, and other specific methods for engaging in faith-building conversations with others. Greg pulls from his over 30 years of experience debating atheists and agnostics to help you share your faith with grace and truth.

Mr. Greg Koukl

Greg Koukl is a writer, public speaker and talk show host who’s spent 30 years advocating for and defending the Christian worldview. Greg has written or contributed to 15 books, including The Story of RealityTactics, and Precious Unborn Human Persons. Greg has published nearly 230 articles and has spoken on 80 college and university campuses in the U.S. and abroad.

Tactics front cover

Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions

In a world increasingly indifferent to Christian truth, followers of Christ need to be equipped to communicate with those who do not speak their language or accept their source of authority. In Tactics, 10th Anniversary Edition, Gregory Koukl demonstrates how to artfully regain control of conversations, keeping them moving forward in constructive ways through thoughtful diplomacy. You’ll learn how to stop challengers in their tracks and how to turn the tables on questions or provocative statements. Most important, you’ll learn how to get people thinking about Jesus.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 1

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Giving up Sugar, Tasting God's Goodness

As a latchkey kid, Wendy Speake turned to sugar for comfort. Every Friday, she would pedal to the candy show and use her allowance to fill her bag with candy. And one day, when she was older and a mom of three young boys, she came to realize that she was still “pedaling” away from her stress and using sugar as comfort, instead of turning to Jesus. She was joyless, worn out, tired, and in need of a change. In this interview, Wendy will challenge Christians to take 40 days to focus on fasting from something they turn to instead of Jesus for comfort. She invited people to break free from a dependence on sugar and taste the goodness of God.

Author Wendy Speake smiling as she holds up her book "The 40-Day Social Media Fast"

Mrs. Wendy Speake

With a background in Hollywood as a trained actress, Wendy Speake ministers to women as a bible teacher by applying the power of drama, poetry and comedy to the study of Scripture and real-life application of biblical truths. She has co-authored two books with Amber Lia titled Triggers: Exchanging Parents’ Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses and their latest, Parenting Scripts: When What You’re Saying Isn’t Working, Say Something New. Wendy is also the co-author (with Kelli Stuart) of Life Creative: Inspiration for Today’s Renaissance Mom.

Cover image of the book "The 40-Day Sugar Fast"

The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation

Welcome to the 40-Day Sugar Fast, a fast that begins with us giving Jesus our sugar and ends with Jesus giving us himself–the only thing that can ever truly satisfy our soul’s deep hunger. On this 40-day journey you’ll learn how to stop fixating on food and other things you use to fill the voids in life and instead fix your eyes on Christ. Anyone who runs to sugar for comfort or a reward, who eats mindlessly or out of boredom, who feels physically and spiritually lethargic, or who struggles with self-control will discover here not only freedom from their cravings but an entirely new appetite for the good things God has for us.

Understanding the Root of Your Child's Misbehavior - Part 2

Often, children act out because they are used to getting attention through bad behavior. Dr. Kevin Leman offers advice to help parents transform their child’s behavior. He discusses the benefits of allowing your kids to learn from real-life consequences and describes the importance of understanding your child’s temperament based on his birth order.

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman

Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known family psychologist and an award-winning, New York Times best-selling author. He is also a popular public speaker and media personality who has made countless guest appearances on numerous radio and TV programs. Dr. Leman has written more than 50 books including The Birth Order BookHave a New Kid by Friday and Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours.

Bundle of Why Your Kids Misbehave

Why Your Kids Misbehave and What to Do about It

Tantrums. Talking back. Throwing toys or food. Meltdowns. Slamming doors. Kids know just how to push your buttons. You’ve tried all sorts of methods, but nothing seems to work. In this book, Dr. Kevin Leman reveals exactly why kids misbehave and how you can turn that behavior around with practical, no-nonsense strategies that really work . . . and are a long-term win for both of you.

Loving Your Spouse Through the Seasons of Marriage - Part 2

Debra Fileta has identified the four seasons of marriage that correspond with our natural seasons – spring (new life and new love), summer (things get hot!), fall (showing our true colors), and winter (long days ahead). In this interview, she will help couples better understand the four seasons of healthy relationships, what to expect during each one, and how to carefully navigate them for a stronger marriage.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage.

Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of a Healthy Relationship

Every relationship goes through four life-changing seasons: Spring. Summer. Fall. Winter. Each season plays an important role in taking your relationship to the next level. And depending on how you navigate each season, your relationship will either flourish and grow, or it will slowly die. Whether you’re single, dating, engaged or married, join licensed professional counselor and relationship expert, Debra Fileta as she takes you on an eye-opening psychological and spiritual journey through the four seasons that she has observed in every healthy relationship.

Reconciling Faith and Science in a Medical Crisis

Dr. Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon who has faced many heavy challenges in his life – from serving in the Iraq War to removing deadly brain tumors to experiencing the loss of a teenage son. He’ll share about his difficult quest to find answers to some of life’s toughest questions, while holding onto his faith in God and the sure hope of heaven

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Dr. W. Lee Warren

Dr. Lee Warren

W. Lee Warren, M.D., is a brain surgeon , inventor, Iraq War veteran, and author of I’ve Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon’s Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know, winner of the Christian Book Award®. His previous book, No Place to Hide, was included on the 2015 U.S. Air Force Chief of Staff’s Recommended Reading List. Dr. Warren has appeared on The 700 Club and the CBS Evening News, and his writings have been featured in Guideposts magazine. His Dr. Lee Warren Podcast, which is heard in more than 60 countries, helps listeners use the power of neuroscience, faith, and common sense to change their lives.

Cover image of Dr. Lee Warren's book "I've Seen the End of You"

I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know

This gripping inspirational memoir grapples with the tension between faith and science—and between death and hope—as a seasoned neurosurgeon faces insurmountable odds and grief both in the office and at home.

Praying Scripture Over Your Child’s Life - Part 1

Jodie Berndt loves to pray for her children. She’s been doing that for the past thirty years. Now she helps other parents to talk to God, asking for the salvation of their kids, and for wisdom, self-discipline, purpose, a future and much more. She offers fun and practical encouragement that moms and dads can put to work immediately in their daily lives as they prepare their children for a life in Christ.

Headshot of Focus on the Family broadcast guest Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt

Jodie Berndt is a public speaker, a Bible teacher, and the the author of 10 books. Find out more about Jodie and get some free resources (including printable prayer cards and calendars) at her website, jodieberndt.com.

Cover image of Jodie Berndt's book "Praying the Scriptures for Your Children"

Praying the Scriptures Over Your Children

You will discover how using the Bible to shape your desires and requests opens the door to God’s provision—and frees us from things like worry and fear in our parenting! This expanded edition of the bestseller features updated content on issues like technology and identity, and comes with new material designed to invite children into the family prayer circle. Purchase now and receive 10% off your product.

Mothers and Sons: Being a Godly Influence - Part 1

Rhonda Stoppe describes her early motherhood challenges of raising a son, which was intimidating to her. She found help through group of older women mentors. She urges moms to see their role as ministry in shaping sons to be good and godly men. Rhonda outlines several practical suggestions to moms about spiritual training, how to communicate with boys, and supporting the father-son relationship as a wife.

Headshot of Rhonda Stoppe

Rhonda Stoppe

Drawing upon 35 years of experience as a mentor, pastor’s wife, and homeschool mom, Rhonda Stoppe offers encouragement and guidance to women as an author and public speaker. She is popularly known as the “No Regrets Woman,” as she is especially passionate about helping women live life without regrets. Rhonda’s books include Moms Raising Sons to Be MenReal Life Romance, and The Marriage Mentor, which she co-authored with her husband, Steve.

Cover image of Rhonda Stoppe's book "Moms Raising Sons to be Men"

Moms Raising Sons to Be Men

Mothers of boys have the special calling to shape future men of God. Popular speaker Rhonda Stoppe, mom to two sons, knows this opportunity is a challenge, a joy, and probably the most important work of a woman’s life. Drawing from years of experience, this inspirational resource will revive the faithfulness and fortitude a woman needs to partner with God as they shape the character and heart of a future godly man.

Identifying Triggers in Your Marriage Part 1

They were both convinced they had married the wrong person. From almost the very beginning of their marriage, Amber and Guy Lia experienced various tensions and personality clashes related to house cleaning, backseat driving, workaholism, and intimacy. In this two-day Focus on the Family broadcast, Amber and Guy discuss how they bravely faced the triggers head-on, and committed to working on their own relationships with Jesus. As you listen to the Lia’s story, you’ll feel hope that you, too, can see real marriage transformation!

Headshot of Guy and Amber Lia

Mr. and Mrs. Guy and Amber Lia and Mrs. Jean Daly

Amber Lia is a work-at-home mom, blogger, public speaker, and co-author of two best-selling books. Her husband, Guy, is a former TV, feature film, and VFX development and production executive who has worked on popular TV shows and films. Guy and Amber own Storehouse Media Group, a faith- and family-friendly TV and film production company based in Los Angeles,

Cover image of the book "Marriage Triggers" by Guy and Amber Lia

Marriage Triggers: How You and Your Spouse Can Exchange Angry Reactions for Gentle Biblical Responses

A husband-wife team offers practical advice for married couples to end the cycle of reactionary arguments by examining the most common issues that trigger disagreements and apply God’s Word to radically transform relationships.

What to Do When You're Not Okay - Part 1

Life can be pretty stressful. Between work, relationships, and other obligations, the pressure builds, and we lose sight of who we are. Counselor Debra Fileta helps you better understand your emotions, assess your mental, physical, and spiritual health, and intentionally pursue a path to wellbeing. In dealing with anxiety, depression, and panic attacks, Debra understands the importance of self-examination as well as the benefits of seeking professional help. She offers biblically-based advice, tools, and encouragement to help you get on a path toward healing and wholeness.

Author Debra Fileta in the Focus on the Family broadcast studio

Mrs. Debra Fileta

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor specializing in relationship and marital issues. She is also a public speaker and the author of multiple books, including Married SexChoosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me, Love in Every Season, and Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are, How You’re Doing, and Why It Matters. Debra’s popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, and her Love + Relationships podcast reach millions of people each year offering guidance on topics including love, sex, and marriage. Debra resides in Pennsylvania with her husband, John, and their four children.

Are You Really Okay?

Are You Really OK: Getting Real About Who You Are

In Are You Really OK? author and licensed counselor Debra Fileta challenges you to get real with who you are and how you’re doing spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically so you can recognize where you need growth and healing.

Navigating a Toxic Culture with Your Daughter - Part 1

As a pediatrician, Dr. Meg Meeker has seen thousands of girls come through her office through the years. They struggle with eating issues, sexual identity, social media…and many other challenges in this toxic culture. Dr. Meeker will encourage parents to invest love and time in their daughters and develop their character to give them the best opportunity for a bright future, all rooted in a spiritual foundation. The discussion also includes healthy feminism vs. toxic feminism

Mrs. Meg Meeker

Dr. Meg Meeker is a pediatrician who is widely recognized as one of the country’s leading authorities on parenting, teens and children’s health. With appearances on numerous nationally syndicated radio and TV programs, her popularity as a an expert on key issues confronting families has created a strong following across America. Her work with countless families over the years served as the inspiration behind her best-selling books which include Strong Fathers, Strong DaughtersStrong Mothers, Strong Sons and The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers

Cover image of Dr. Meg Meeker's book "Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture"

Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture: 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe

Meg Meeker has been a pediatrician for more than thirty years, is a mother and a grandmother, and has seen it all. She knows what makes for strong, happy, healthy young women–and what puts our daughters at risk. Combining that experience with her famous common sense, she explains the eleven steps that will help your daughter–whether she’s a toddler or a troubled teen–to achieve her full human potential.

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Newest Release - Episode 1: The Truth About Life!

In this episode, we will tackle tough questions like, “When does life begin?” and “What does the Bible
say about Life?” You’ll discover and understand the stages of pre-born life and that babies are more than
just a clump of cells!

Yes, I Promise to Pray for the Pre-born and Their Moms!

Will you pray for the pre-born and moms that are facing unexpected pregnancies? We will send you a 7-day prayer guide that will help guide you along this journey with us!! You can even choose to receive this great resource by text!